


Clash

by Adayinmymeadow



Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms, The Walking Dead (Comics), The Walking Dead (TV), The Walking Dead Series - Robert Kirkman & Jay Bonansinga
Genre: F/F, F/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-03
Updated: 2019-11-25
Packaged: 2020-01-04 03:52:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 64,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18335639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Adayinmymeadow/pseuds/Adayinmymeadow
Summary: poor awkward Stephanie was fine daydreaming and writing fanfiction about the leader in her community. Not to mention she somehow found ways to embarrass herself in front of Negan. However a bully from her past causes cause her to become face to face with the man of her dreams.





	1. Daydreams and Bullies

**Author's Note:**

> this was a dream I had.

Negan… His name sounded like sex. He was all I could think about these days. He was the best thing to happen to me. His dimpled smile, his strong arms… Did I mention he was the reason we were alive? He was so handsome. I watched him across the cafeteria, he was making his rounds. Simon and Dwight were at his heels. I sighed dreamingly. The way his jacket made him look oh so ever badass, or how cool he looked swinging around Lucille: it was just enough to send a girl through an orgasm. If only he knew you existed girl. My conscious reminded me (who suspiciously sounded like my thirteen year old self). But I didn’t care as long as I caught a glimpse of him every now and then was fine. Beside me I heard my friend Gina snicker.

“Girl, you better shut that mouth before you drool all over my mash potatoes.” Gina warned me playfully. I looked down at the food in front of me reminding myself I was at work, I need the points to get a typewriter I had seen at the “market” ( honestly that’s what I called it.)

“He just so…” I started and I was lost in one of my daydreams.

“Damn you must be thinking of something fucking amazing with that look on your face.” A voice pulled me from my daydream. Negan stared down at me with a grin, his dimples looking so mouthwatering. He was talking to me. “Now I wanna fucking know what are you thinking about?” oh shit! He was talking to me! I noticed he was in line with the other saviors. Simon was on his right and Dwight at his left all three stared at me. What was he doing here! Most of the time we had to bring his lunch to his room! I froze up clutching the serving spoon to my chest. Don’t just stand there you idiot! My conscious screamed at me. Do something!!! I took a step back, quickly ducking behind Gina, making sure I didn’t hit her pregnant belly. Nooooo! You idiot! You’re embarrassing us!

“Stephanie, Negan’s waiting for his lunch.” Gina informed me. I glared at her. She was always trying to get me to interact with Negan. Face burning I peeked out from behind her and slowly used the serving spoon to push Negan’s lunch on his tray. I stared up at him a few more seconds before mumbling a thank you. Embarrassed I hid behind Gina one more time. “I’m sorry sir, she shy.” Gina explained in a cheerful manner.

“Aww, look at that, Little Stephie is all shy.” I heard Simon tease.

“I think it’s cute.” Negan’s rumbly sex god voice made way to my ears. Simon laughed then silence. Apart of me was ecstatic that Negan called me cute the other part of me not so much. Why are we so awkward? The voice moaned in horror. I moved from behind Gina to lean against the metal doors of the food warmer. Sadly my conscious was right. This wasn’t the first time I had humiliated myself in front of Negan. There had been countless times. But there were three moments that were high on my list that I would like to erase from mind. And they go as followed:

The first time was a year ago. I was brought to the sanctuary with Gina and a few others. I wanted to thank Negan and as I made my way up to him. The person I was with tripped me. I face planted at his feet. I was so embarrassed I ran away only to crash in to a savior behind me and sent him flying into one of Negan’s trucks. Thank the stars it was parked.

The second time was when I was delivering a party tray to Negan’s wives. I didn’t expect him to be there, half naked! So I panicked placed the tray on a counter and turn to leave only to crash into the closed door!

The third time was not so long ago, it was the worst one yet. It had been Negan’s birthday. I had used my points to buy a canister of baseball bat cleaner and some new barbwire. Not to mention I hand sewn a red scarf for him, and embroidered silver barb wire at the ends of the scarf. I wrapped the gift all pretty and went to find him. When I finally built the courage to give him the gift… I tripped over my shoelaces, the gift went flying from my arms and smacked Negan in the face. I managed to cut my eyebrow during my fall, I thanked the stars Simon carried me away. Six stitched was worth it, then to face Negan after that horrible incident. My luck with Negan has never been good. Gina’s snickering caught my attention, I looked up at her.

“Now, girlie don’t look so sad.” Gina collected herself. “It turned out all right!” Gina was fixing new dishes for the saviors coming to lunch rush.

“Gina, I’m a stupid, awkward idiot!” I brought my knees to my chest, wrapped my arms around my legs and buried my face in my knees. I felt Gina pat me on top of my head.

“At least he called you cute.” She said in a comforting manner. I smiled into my knees. Gina was right, Negan had called me cute! “How about this, why don’t you call it a day: and I’ll see you at the dinner rush.” I looked up at her in surprise mouth falling open. I climbed to my feet.

“What? I can’t leave you with this rush!” I said sweeping my arm out toward the near empty cafeteria. I scanned the area with disbelief. “Oh.” Gina burst in to laughter and slapped me on the back.

“I’ll be fine! Go and write! I know that’s what you want to do anyway.” I scanned Gina to see if she really was okay with me leaving. I returned my gaze to the cafeteria. The tables weren’t as full as usual, and it was pretty slow; since most of the saviors were out. I noticed Negan and his group were nowhere in sight.

“Thanks Gee!” I squealed with excitement. I kissed her on the check before I ran to the back to get my backpack out of my cubby. I quickly made way out of the cafeteria, with a destination in mind. As I came up to the emergency exit stairwell, I made sure the cost was clear before slipping inside. Works were not allowed in this part of the building, and if I got caught I could get in big trouble. As I made my way up the stairs I couldn’t help but wonder if I should finish the new fanfiction I had started of Negan. I know! I know! It was wrong for me to write such things for the leader of our community. I gave a depressed sigh. Sometimes I missed the internet. I missed my online friends. I miss staying up late chatting with people from all over the world. Hell, I was so starved for fanfiction, that I missed the fandoms. (Well, not the drama.) I wish I could send a picture of negan to my online community, they would have loved him.

I finally made it to my secret spot, it was the area near the door of the roof access. It was tucked in the corner where if someone came out of the fifth floor exit, they wouldn’t see me! It was the best spot to write and if you wanted some peace and quiet. I settled against the wall pulling off my backpack and unzipped it. I opened it to find my composition book. I saw loose pens, three books from the library, a handmade sketchbook Gina’s husband had made for me, my old smart phone that I now used as a music player, and head phones I had since before the end of the world. My heart begun to pound with panic. My composition book full of fanfiction of Negan was missing. I looked around where I sat just in case it fell out when I opened my backpack. I made a noise of panic in the back of my throat. I had to find that book! I closed my backpack, jumping to my feet running back to the kitchen.

I searched my cubby with shaking hands, nothing but recipe books and loose leaf paper. I tried to remember what I had done this morning. I moved toward the library, remembering I had free time before breakfast.

“Hank!” I shouted bursting through the library doors. Hank cried out and dropped the pile of books he had been holding. Hank was an older man, with brown hair and a stocky built. He had owned his own book store, and was the reason we had so many books. “Sorry! I left a note book here!” I huffed between breaths. I crouched down to help Hank pick up the books he had dropped. Hank thought for a second rubbing his chin.

“The one you’re always writing in?” he asked. I nodded, -making small piles of books on the ground. He shook his head. “I saw you put in your backpack with the books you checked out this morning.” I cursed silently. What if negan finds it!? My conscious screamed. I was on the verge of tears as I thanked him for his time and running out the library. I moved to the emergency exit stairwell and sat on the stairs. The hot tears of frustration already spilling.

“Kirstin found it! It’s hilarious!” a voice echoed in the stairwell. “It has all these stories about Negan.” The voice continued. My heart fell to my butt. I was so worried that Negan was going to find it when the worst person in the world had found it. I jumped to my feet and ran up the stair taking two at a time. I was a woman on a mission. Anger burned through me, I had enough of that bitch. I ran past the two woman on the stairwell, barely registering that it was two of Negan’s wives. I entered the hallway and heard her voice. I stormed in to the Wives sanctuary. My eyes landed on Kirstin, she sat on one of the couches reading aloud from my book. Four other wives sat around her listening.

“You bitch!” I shouted surprising the women. Kirstin looked up at me a cruel smile on her face.

“Hello, Lardo. We were just enjoying your shit stories.” She greeted me. I watched her close my notebook. My heart had skipped a beat at the nickname she had given me throughout our middle school/high school days. Glared at Kirstin, she looked she was dressed in a beautiful black dress her blonde long hair fell around her shoulders.

Kirstin Vander-Hill was a bully. She had made my middle/ high school experience hell. When I thought I was finally free from her after I graduated. She decided to follow me to the college I had been accepted into and copied me to do a dual major of creative writing and theater. She told anyone who would listen she was a natural born writer and actress. She was cruel, she humiliated me, degraded me and forced me to do her homework. I worked hard to graduate a year earlier then her and I was finally free from the wicked witch. I lived in bliss for three years and then the end of the world hit. Two years later I found myself returning to a zombie filled hometown with Gina and to my shock she was alive with her boyfriend at the time and others I had known growing up. When we were rescued she returned to her old self. I guess she realized she was going to live to an old age and bullied me whenever she had the chance.

“Give me back my notebook you—you—“ I was so upset that insults were escaping my vocabulary. “Beef witted flap mouthed scallywag!” nailed it. Kirstin’s eye twitched at the insult a few wives giggled.

“Look at you acting so tough.” She stood up moving toward me. “Looking cute stuffed in those overalls.” I took a sharp breath. I wasn’t going to cry. I was going to stand my ground! fuck her!

“Fuck off you paunchy maggot pie! And give me my notebook!” I shouted holding out my hand. She sucked in a sharp breath. Her eyes narrowing dangerously.

“Do you have any fucking idea who I am?” she growled. Stand your ground. My conscious coached me. You can get your book back. I took a step up to her never losing eye contact. I was done, this was the last time I was going to let her boss me around.

“Yeah, you’re the ill-breed rank slag that’s gonna get her face clawed off!” I threatened. With a burst of courage I shoved her. She stumbled back her face contorting in rage.

“Go ahead and try fatty!” she came at me shoving with all her might and hooking her foot around my ankle. I cried out as I feel. Somehow I managed to spin and landed on hard on my knees and hands. However my face smashed in to something warm and covered in grey.

“Well, hell-fucking-lo to you too doll. But how about we move to a private setting if we wanna have a good fucking time?” A familiar voice sang down to me. I pulled away catching Negan’s eyes. He winked at me. I realized I had fell head first in to his groin. Great we can add this to the list! I quickly rose to my feet. Simon and Arat stood behind Negan watching with wonder. “So Darling what are you doing up here?” I was lost for words. If I told him the truth he might get the book and read all those filthy things I wrote! On the other hand…if I don’t answer. My gaze landed on Lucille.

“Oh Negan! I’m so glad you’re here!” Kirstin breezed past me and went to hug Negan. She kissed him on the mouth I felt a stab of envy and jealousy in my gut. “This girl came running in saying I should read the story she wrote about you!” My eyes widen. Negan turned to me a smile on his face.

“No shit?” he asked. I stretched toward Kirstin trying grabbing at my book but she laughed and danced away. My foot caught the carpet and I crashed in to Negan, he wrapped an arm around my waist to steady me. Oh my gods he touching us! My conscious squealed. Dude right not the time I thought back. But was secretly pleased he was touching me.

“Don’t be so shy Stephanie.” She laughed. She opened my notebook and turned to a random page. “I found myself pinned against the wall, Negan’s arms either side of me.” Kirstin read that horrible smile on her face. Humiliation burned through me, tears pricking at my eyes. “He leaned down, lips inches from mine. His hand moved from the wall to my jeans. I couldn’t help but moan as he cupped my mound-“ I tore myself from negan and snatched the book from Kirstin’s hands. A wanted to hurt her, but I decided to play her at her own game. I had a degree in theater and I was going to use it!

“You’re reading it wrong!” I snarled opening the book and finding that passage. “Read it like this!” and I acted my heart out. I made my voice breathy during the love scenes, I even moaned a few times, and when the character climaxed I turned to Kirstin. “She sounds like this.” And faked an orgasm, calling out Negan’s name. (hey, I can’t be the only one person in the world that wanted to be in plays right?”) I snapped my notebook shut. And made a “what now bitch?” gesture. If looks could kill I would have been dead. Kirstin knew she had lost.

“Holy shit!” Simon’s voice broke though the silent room. “Who knew Stephie had some fucking skills. That one hell of an imagination girl.” Simon smiled at me, I felt my face burn with embarrassment. Arat raised her hand in a thumbs up. I couldn’t look at Negan.

“I’ll be damn!” Negan finally spoke up. “That was a fucking spectacle.” Negan moved near me, he smelled cologne and leather. If I wasn’t so embarrassed I would have swooned for him to be so near me. “Your story gave me some fucking ideas.’ He wiggled his eyebrows at his wives. He leaned down his mouth near my ear. “And if I could fucking say, that performance got me fucking hard.” I sucked in a breath and gawked at him. My heart was pounding a mile a minute. I honestly didn’t know what to say to that. “Maybe you should stay and show me what you’re capable of.” Negan grinned at me, I clutched my book to my chest and found myself looking down at my shoes. Holy shit! Is he for real girl!? Climb him like a fucking tree! Kirstin snorted catching our attention.

“Really Negan! Someone like her!? She’s a virgin!” My head snapped up. “My brother tried it with her and she cried!” Kirstin laughed. Tears burned through my eyes, my hands shook with anger. How dare she bring that up!

“Fuck you Kirstin! Your brother was a horrible person and I hope that every time he thinks of me he gets assed rape by demons with pitchforks!” I shouted. I spun to run out of the room when a sharp pain at my hair yanked me back. Fucking bitch grabbed our hair! Kick her in the head! My conscious yelled. I dropped my book in surprised and turned around clocking Kirstin in the throat with my fist. Something inside me snapped. She hunched over trying to catch her breath I grabbed her by her hair and tossed her to the ground. I swung my foot back and nailing her in the face. As she laid there unmoving I knew I fucked up.

I cried out in pain as my back hit the floor, Simon was on top of me, Knife to my neck. Simon as a sad look on his face.

“Sorry kid.” He whispered. When I gave him a confused look. Negan came in to my view. Rage etched on his face.

“I’m sorry sweetness. But you know the fucking rules, that shit doesn’t fucking fly here.” We’re going to die because of that vain miscreant lout. I couldn’t help but laugh, in my situation it wasn’t a good idea; but it was laughable. Negan stared at me with a look at disbelief. "You think this is some fucking joke?” he asked crouching down near my head.

“No, sir.” I said giggling. I was surprised how normal I sounded, how loud my voice was and I wasn’t mumbling. “It’s just funny how all my life that pile of plastic surgery left overs walked all over me. I never did anything to her.” I started to laugh again. It was as if my conscious took over my vocal cords. I couldn’t stop.” But here I am going to die, because I managed to finally fight back.” I took a deep breath I was in hysterics. “Holy shit, my grandpa was right! The meek fail and the strong win, you now he always said that before he beat me and my cousin black and blue?” I continued to laugh my stomach already hurting. My laughter died down. I heard crying come from the middle of the room, in the corner of my eye I saw Kirstin sit up. I felt a relief that she was alive, I didn’t want to be the reason a second Vander-Hill died. “I’m about to get my head so lovingly smashed in--” I took a deep breath. Trying hard not to cry but I could feel the tears starting to fall from my eyes. “By Lucille, while later tonight that haggard slag will be riding you like a drunk sailor on a tugboat.” I stared at Negan, he stared back an unreadable look on his face. Negan stood up. I gave a small whimper. This was it. I was going to die.

“Let her up Simon.” Negan finally spoke. Simon got off me, kneeling next to me. I sat up reaching up to touch the place the knife had dug into. Simon patted me on the back before standing up and moving behind Negan. I didn’t move but stared up a Negan. “You’re a good fucking cook. Too good to throw away. So honey I’ll let you live, if and only if you apologize to Kirstin.” I stood up quickly. He was fucking kidding right? There was no way in hell I was going to apologize to that bitch! I rather die. Negan stared at me and swung Lucille on to his shoulder. Scratch that. I took a deep breath and bit the inside of my cheek. I turned to Kirstin. I felt satisfaction roar through me seeing Kirstin with the side of her face swollen and her nose bleeding, not to mention the bruise forming on her throat.

“Kirstin,” I started. I was trying so hard not to insult that bag of decomposing flesh. “I’m sorry you feel so inadequate that you have to bully people! I’m sorry that you’re such a cunt!” with that I ran off. Nobody stopped me. Negan told me to apologized, but he didn’t tell me what to apologize for. As I ran down the hall, I couldn’t help but feel proud that I sort of stood up for myself. I knew there would be consequences but maybe I’ll let future Stephanie deal with it.


	2. My big fat mouth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stephanie deals with the consequences.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> why do i like torturing this poor girl? also i was inspired by Lizzie McGuire when i wrote 13.  
> I did write this on my phone so expect typos and grammar errors sorry.

I could just punch my past self in the face. It had been about two weeks since the horrible incident Since then I’ve kept my head down, did my work, and made sure to stay out of Negan’s way. Not to mention I had left my precious notebook with all my fanfiction and original chapters in negan’s wives room. I took it as the lost refusing to write anything For two weeks, that’s until I got hit with an idea for an original story. 

So here I was in the middle of the market staring at Ellen with my mouth open in disbelief, trying to process what she had just told me. 

“What do you mean the notebooks tripled in points!?“ I asked. My heart pounding. I found myself growling in frustration. Buying a notebook now would leave me with a quarter of what I have. Ellen gave me a look that said, that she was ashamed to tell me such thing. 

“I’m sorry honey, Simon inform me that all the writing utensils and supplies will be tripled for you.“ I clinch my fist in anger I knew this was Negan is doing I’ll because of what happened two weeks ago. My stupid mouth, my stupid pride. 

“Just for me it’s been triple points? “ I asked. She nodded. I looked around realizing that a majority of workers, dealers and saviors were watching us, whispering amongst themselves. I wasn’t surprised that word had gotten around about what had happened with Kirstin. 

“yes, orders from Negan.“ I felt the tears of frustration prick my eyes, I wasn’t going to cry in front of Ellen. I found myself sighing in defeat, there was nothing I could do. No what? 13 asked. Had decided to name her that since she sounded like my thirteen year old self. 

“Thanks Ellen “ I gave her a sad smile as I got out of line. “I’m sorry I held up the line.“ I moved from the line, ignoring the looks I was getting. I felt the prickles of tension at the back of my neck, sighting I reached up rubbing at it. Laughter caught my attention I turned to see Kirstin flirting with her ex boy toy Roy. I felt anger burn through my body, Kristen had made an appearance a day after the incident moaning and crying to Roy. She told her story to anyone that would lend a listening ear. I moved quickly to the exit, I had to get out of here. 

“Hey, Steph.” I turned to see Richard, Gina’s husband, he was the king of DIY’s he sold his items for points. I turned to him, he gave me a concerned look when he saw my face. “ are you okay?” He asked softy. I nodded, giving him a small smile. 

“Yeah, fine.” I didn’t want to bring him in my drama knowing negan he would punish Richard for just knowing me. Richard leaned down and pulled out my backpack. 

“Okay, but you left this in the kitchen.” I smiled at him as I took the pack. That’s when I noticed it was heavier then usual. Confused I opened it to see two packs of copier paper. Richard smiled as I hurried to close the pack, slinging it over my shoulder. I gave him a look an astonished look. “It’s a gift, I heard what happened. Remember what I taught you, double the thread so it could hold the binding better.” He patted me on the shoulder.i nodded excitedly thanking him profusely. “Now go to Gina, she’s been worried.” I gave him a wave as I ran off. 

As I entered the housing unit for workers I looked around searching for Gina. Sometimes she helped the elderly, with making their bed or their laundry. Each workers had their own beds, their spaces were claimed by the curtains surrounding the bed, so they could close if they wanted privacy. my bed was one over from Gina and Richard.as I made way to her space, I noticed Gina was sitting on her bed hunched over. Worried I hurried to her. 

“Gee,” I said as I came up next to her. “What’s wrong?” I asked as I came up next to her. Gin looked at me her eyes red as if she had been crying. She gave me a small smile. 

“ just hormones honey.” She rubbed her enlarge belly lovingly. I had a feeling that it was something else, but I knew Gina wouldn’t tell me. I studied my friend, her coco skin glowing with her pregnancy, her coily hair pulled back from her face with a hairband. She looked so put together for a zombie apocalypse. 

I couldn’t help but remember the first time I had met Gina it had been years ago. I had been scavenging for food and came upon her and her sister in-law surrounded by a herd. I managed to help them, they took me in and since then we had became best of friends. I had met Richard a few months later and introduced the two. 

“Please, tell me what’s wrong.” I. Said softly as I hugged her close. Gina burst into tears. She hugged me back. 

“Negan ordered that my prenatal care be tripled in points.” She sobbed. I cursed, medication was high enough with points and to be tripled. “I don’t have that kind of points!” Anger once again burst through me. The tingling at the back of my head came back and my left hand begun to shake. I took a deep breath. I knew I had to make this right. 

“I know what I have to do.” I said softly. I let her go. “I’ll go talk to negan, I have to make everything right.” I jumped to my feet and begun pacing in front of Gina. “ I have to tell him that you’re innocent , to punish me; not you.” I thought for a second. “I know! I’ll make him cookies.” Gina gave a laugh. 

“Cookies? Sweetie?” She asked. I nodded. 

“Yeah, if his mouth is full he can’t yell at me!” I smiled down at her. “Don’t worry gee! I’ll make everything okay.” With that I ran off to the kitchen. 

As I stuffed my backpack in my cubby, I could feel the tremors in my left arm start up. I lammed the metal door shut, and stuffed my earphone in my ears, I put on my music list on my phone, letting the music take over.i had to calm down. I could afford to have an incident right now, Gina was counting on me. 

An hour later, I was making my way to Negan’s office clutching the Tupperware of cookies to my chest. I was practicing what I was going to say to negan, but at the same time I was panicking. Negan was the boss, the sexy hot boss. I had to trust myself, and hope that I didn’t embarrass myself. As I came up to Negan's office door, I saw Simon and Arat chatting. Both stopped and turned to me wonder on their faces. My left hand shook a bit, but I clenched it going that they didn’t notice. 

“look who it is Arat! Little Stephie!” Simon greeted a big smile on his face. Arat didn't say anything but acknowledged me with a nod. “What do you got there?”he asked looking down at the Tupperware. 

‘Cookies, I’m here to talk to negan.” I answered. Simon looked at Arat before reaching out to take the Tupperware from my hands.he opened it and took a whiff. He groaned. 

“These smell good.” He took a cookie and bit into it. Arat reached over taking one as well. “Now, sweetheart, tell me why every person I asked about you, have nothing but nice things to say about you?” Simon asked with his mouthful. Arat handed me the Tupperware. I thought for a second. 

“I’m friendly?” It was more of a question than an answer. Simon stared down at me, eating the rest of the cookie.he knocked the door with out a word just studying me. I hear negan say something, and simon opened the door nodding his head to enter. I took a deep breath and smiled at the two as I entered the room. I gave a slight jump as the door closed behind me. 

“Well,, look who decided to make a fucking appearance!” Negan sang. I forgot how handsome he was, his dimple were mouth watering. “Now doll what is it that I could fucking help you with.” I honestly didn’t know how to start the conversation. Negan sat at his desk, Lucille was nowhere insight but I knew she was close by. He leaned back watching me.Say something idiot! 13 screamed. 

“Cookie made, Gina sad stop?” The word rushed out before I could stop them. I could see 13 face palming. negan raised an eyebrow, his tongue peeked out from between his teeth. I cleared my throat. “I mean, I made you cookies as a peace offering.” I gently place the Tupperware in front of negan. My left hand shook, I quickly stuffed it in my hoodie pocket. He eyed the cookies before leaning forward to grab the plastic case. “Sir, I understand that I was rude and insulted you. But please don’t punish Gina, she has nothing to do with my stupid mouth.” Negan took a cookie and leaned back in his seat. He studied me. 

“No.’ He bit the cookie. 

“No?” I asked. He nodded 

I don’t think you learned your fucking question.” He chew slowly. “Damn this is good.” He smiled at me. I opened my mouth to argue, but he cut me off. “Now, tell me girly why did it take you two fucking weeks to come up here to fucking talk to me?” He paused to bite in the cookie again.” That’s fucking disrespectful.” I stared down at him, with confusion, anger and disbelief. The tingles at the back of my neck slowly grew. 

“Sir,” I started . The pressure building. “ please understand that Gina had nothing to do with that decision. She is innocent!” Negan glared up at me. “If you have to punish anyone, punish Kirstin! She’s the reason all of this started!” Negan moved to his feet, I took a step back as he slammed Lucile on the top of his desk. 

“You have the fucking balls to fucking come in here and fucking sass at me!” Negan snarled. I opened my mouth to argue, but he slammed the bat own again. “Speak when you’re spoken to!” He yelled as he moved around the desk, he came up to me towering me with his large frame. The pressure and tingling encased me. My left arm shaking. Negan grabbed me by the arm. “You come in here telling me how to deal with this situation? Who the fuck do you think you are?” He shouted shaking me, I looked up at him black spiderwebs breaking my vision everything went quiet, Negan's mouth was still moving. 

“Negan,” I whimpered, I felt his grip tightened on my arm. The signs of my stress seizure was stronger now. “Negan!” I shouted clutching at his jacket in fear. The tremors tore through my body as everything went black.


	3. anger and truths

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the truth comes out between Kirsten and Stephanie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ugh...why am i writing so many fics? i really need to finish them.

I could hear my alarm on my phone going off somewhere. I groaned rolling over blindly looking for my backpack. As I reached further down my head hit the side table. I let out a whimper but continued my blind search for my backpack. I froze, my heart begun to pound. I didn’t have a side table... I sat up quickly looking around, no memory on how I got in this well decorated room. I looked down at the blankets covering me, they were grey and cotton. My blanket was an old fleece that I had since I was in high school, that was covered in cartoon cats.

My heart continued to pound as I slowly climbed out of the bed. I had no recollection of how the hell I got here. I looked around in a panic, this wasn’t right...where was I?  _ Have we been kidnapped? _  13 asked.  _ Try and remember girl! _  She urged but only bits and piece s  came to me. What was the last thing I remembered? I stumbled a bit as I moved toward the door. I spoke to Ellen right?  I heard voices on the other side of the door, no t  wanting to see who it was ,  I hurried to hide under the bed. Thank the stars it was high enough that I could fit. I watched as the door open and work boots came in to view.

“wake up sleepy  hea \--” Simon's voice was cut off as he hurried to the bed. _  Did we sleep with Simon? _  13 asked. I rolled my eyes.  _ Right like that would ever happen _  I snapped back. I watched as he hurried out of the room. I waited a few seconds before wiggling out from under the bed. I saw my shoes by the door, I quickly slipped them on before running through the door Simon had went through. I stopped short when I saw I was in Negan's office. I noticed my phone on the top of his desk, my headphones next to them wrapped up all neat. Without a word I snatched it up, moving toward the exit. Just as I opened the door, Simon and Gina turned to me. 

“Steph!” she cried throwing her arms around me. I didn’t say anything as she hugged me. I was just so confused.  “thank gods you're okay!” I couldn’t help but hug her back. I found myself looking up at Simon.

“you did give us a scare girly.” Simon patted me on the head. I found myself pulling away from Gina.

“what happened?” I asked softly looking up at Gina since she was 5’10 and I was 5’2. She gave me a concerned look, Smoothing down my hair.

“oh, honey,” she started softly. Simon gently led us inside the office.

“I’ll tell you what happened kid,” he started. I found myself reaching out to steady myself as I got hit with a dizzy spell. He grabbed me by the arm.  “whoa there, girl I got you.” he said as he slid the chair out from the desk and helped me sit down, he did the same for Gina. I could feel the involuntary shakes coming from my body. “here you are.” Simon handed me a cup of water. I took it from him, and downed the water I didn’t realize how thirsty I was. Simon leaned against the desk watching me.

“Honey, you had one of your stress seizures.” Gina said softly. I froze looking up at Simon he nodded

“yep, scared the shit out of me.” Simon laughed.

“look who finally fucking woke up!” a rough voice said. I looked over at the exit door to see negan leaning against the threshold,  lucille  in his hand. My heart skipped a beat, he was smiling down at me.  _ He's a whole lotta man!  _ 13 said dreamingly. “how do you fucking feel?” he asked moving around me and gina to sit behind his desk. His  cologne  hit me and just like that the memories of today flooded back to me. I looked down at the arm he had grabbed and saw the faint markings of a bruise forming. 

“how long was I out?” I asked. 

“two hours.” simon answered. I cursed. I had missed a few hours of my shift.

“did I pee?” I asked. I saw negan look at the space where my phone had been, he raised an eyebrow but didn’t say anything. Simon shook his head, I let out a breath. Okay at least I didn’t embarrass myself again. I found myself thinking about the conversation I had with negan, and knew I wasn’t out of the dog house just yet.

“sir,” I started softly. Negan leaned back in his chair watching me. “Thank you for taking care of me, but I do wanna finish the conversation we had earlier.” 

“oh?” he said. Gina placed a hand on my arm. I looked at her, she gave me  a  “bitch don’t you dare ”  look I smiled at her and squeezed her hand in reassurance. 

“If anyone should be punished, it should be me.” I took a deep breath. “Gina has nothing to do with my stupidity, nor my pride.” negan rubbed at his chin in thought still watching me. “I’ll properly apologize to  kirstin .” my stomach turned at the thought of apologizing to that bitch, but if it helped Gina in any way I was willing to do it. Negan smiled at me.

“well, hot damn.” he slapped the top of his desk. “that’s what I fucking like to hear.” he sat up and leaned forward. “but I got good fucking news for you. I questioned the wives, and I found out that  kirstin  fucking started the whole thing! So, I'm fucking letting you off the fucking hook!” relief flooded through me.  _ He's so smart...and sexy...  _ 13 drooled. “in fact, I cut her loose!” I heard a squeak escape my mouth. “I don’t like bullies, especially girls that bully fat girls like you.” I jumped to my feet in anger.

“are you insane!?” I shouted. He looked taken back at my outburst. “she bullied me for fun! Now that she’s not a wife, she’ll destroy me!” Gina grabbed my arm trying to calm me down. A dark look passed on negan’s handsome face. “and to make matters worse I'm the reason she's no longer pampered! I'm sorry but you should keep her close to you! You have no idea what the bitch is capable of.” panic set in when I saw his grip tighten on  lucille . My breaths became labored and the tingles were back.

“Steph,” gina started climbing to her feet rubbing at my back in a comforting manner. As she tried to hug me, I pulled away yelling “no.”

“Kirstin is a horrible monster! I am tired of being her fucking punching bag!” I could feel the tears run down my cheeks. “All my fucking life I have dealt with that bitch!” with that I ran, I pushed past Simon and ignored the yells of my name.

I found myself curled up in my secret spot, sobbing quietly. I had my earphones on and my music was loud. horrible memories of Kirstin rushed at me, the humiliation, the name calling, the laughter. I couldn’t help but curse myself. I just had to go back home... I pulled my hood over my head trying to block out the artificial light that was giving me a headache. As my music list ended, I found myself sitting up. I looked down at the phone and I saw that I had been crying for the past three hours. I pushed my back against the wall pulling my knees to my chest. I had yelled at negan, I insulted him, I was going to get the iron. As I stared at the wall in front of me, I heard voices in the stairwell. I buried my head in my knees, I wasn’t ready to face anyone. I  heard  a door open and close. I wanted to cry, scream, to  find  Kirstin and punch her again, while screaming “this is your fault!” but I knew I wouldn’t do that. I was a push over, I knew that, I let anyone walk all over me. I was forgettable.

“kid?” I jumped at Simon’s voice. I looked up to see him crouching down in front of me. He had an unreadable look on his face.

“are you going to kill me?” I asked softly as I pushed my hood off my head. He gave me a small smile and shook his head. He was rubbing at his  mustache .

 “no, of course not. Gina and Richard are worried about you.” he said softly. I studied his face. he was looking at the area near my clavicle. I found myself reaching up and placing my hand over the scar there. Kirstin's brother had given me that before he died. I clutched at the fabric afraid that he could see it through my hoodie.

“is negan going to burn my face?” I asked, Remembering Dwight. Simon gave a laugh, it was a loud booming sound.

“no! Kid what the hell?”  he reached over wiping at the tears on my cheek. “he just wants to talk. That's it.” I shook my head burying my face in my knees again.

“I'm too embarrassed.” Simon sighed as he sat on his rump.

“look kid, we have been looking for you for the past few hours.” simon said as he scooted to sit next to me back against the wall as well. “you should show gratitude, and have a chat with the boss.” I looked up at him. He was looking back down at me. 

“Simon, remember when you asked me why people only have nice stuff to say about me?” Simon looked confused but nodded nonetheless. “it’s because I'm forgettable. They said nice stuff because they didn’t remember me.” simon raised an eyebrow as the way my voice cracked. He suddenly gave a loud laugh.

“that’s shit kid.” he laughed. I glared at him. “I remembered you! Ellen remembers you, all those people knew your name.” 

“really?” I asked. He nodded.

“i mean they said you’re a pushover, but other than that you’re a good kid.” he turned to me. “the first time we met, I remembered you.” he smiled down at me.” you were adorable in that strawberry sweater, your hair was shorter than.” he chuckled. “you threw yourself at me just to have your friends escape.” I couldn’t help but laugh. It was true, the very first time I met simon, I did something stupid.

“I can’t believe you caught me! ”  I laughed.

“I was so confused! Who the fuck yell surprise as they jump at somebody!” our laughter echoing in the stairwell.

“I didn’t know what to do! That was the first thing I thought of.” we giggled like school children for a few minutes. I study simon’s profile. “why are you so nice to me?” I asked softly. He looked at me. He shrugged.

“you’re kind, you don’t have to be. I've seen asshole s  around here, but you,” he scratched at his chin. “you’re genuinely kind.” his mouth turned up in a smile. “besides you keep me entertained!” I looked at him in confusion. “I’ve been keeping tabs on how many times you’ve a: embarrassed yourself, B: you’ve hurt yourself, or C: I had to carry you away.” I felt my face burn.

“dude not cool, it’s embarrassing.” I bemoaned pulling my hood over my head.

“I think it’s cute.” I felt my heart skip a beat.  _ He said we’re cute!  _ 13 yelled. 

“I can’t believe you can carry me.” I said trying to ignore the fact that Simon called me cute. He flexed his arms.

“I’m strong friend!” I laughed. Thought about it for a second. “honestly I thought you would forget about me after a while.” I bit my lip. “everyone does.” he snorted.

“no way, you made me cupcakes for my birthday, and soup when I was sick.” he patted me on my back. “I had to remember you; your food’s good.” I felt myself blush.

“well, you save us.” I whispered feeling suddenly embarrassed. “I had to do something for you.” I felt him gently pull off my hood, I turned to him as he pushed my hair out of my face.

“come on kid,” he said softly as he grabbed my hands. “As much as I like to chat, we have to get you to Negan.” I nodded as he pulled me to my feet. He looked down at me. “you’ll be fine little lady” he teased. His grip in my hands were soft.

“thank you.” he led me down the stairs as we got to the eighth floor the exit door opened and fat joey poked his head in, he greeted me before turning to simon.

“hey boss, I need to talk to you about the outpost trip.” he said softly as if he didn’t want me to hear what he had to say. Simon nodded letting go of my hand. He turned to me.

“meet me up at the wives' floor.”  he instructed. I nodded moving down the stairwell. As I hit the wives’ floor, I saw  kirstin  and two other wives on the st airs , she was sobbing in her hands and both girls were comforting her. I slowly  backed up hoping I could make a run for it without her seeing me, But she looked up. Rage contorted her face and she jumped to her feet.

“you fat bitch!” she shouted coming up to me. I stood my ground; she was not going to push me around anymore. “why would you ruin my life? I've never done anything to you!” she shouted. I rolled my eyes.

“shut the fuck up.” I snarled. “you always play the fucking victim.” she glared down at me.

“my brother should have killed you when he had the chance.” she shot back. Tears prickled at my eyes I was not going to let this slag see me cry! Memories of that awful night tried to make way but 13 was keeping them back with her own version of  lucille . How fucking dare she! 13 screamed.

“your brother was a fucking rapist. I'm fucking glad that I killed him. He was sick in the head.” I snapped.

“liar! “she snarled.

“think about it Kirstin! Why do you think that night he had two sets of chains?” I shouted back. “Gina and the others where scavenging, it was only me and you that night! I know what he did to you! I saw the marks. I saved your fucking life!” she burst in to tears. “Your brother was a sick fuck, you know that!” she shook her head violently as she covered her ears.

“no! Shut up!” she screamed.

“He was going to rape you when he was done with me!” I reached up pulling her hands off her ears. “you knew it, that’s why you didn’t stop me.” she ripped her hands from my grip.

“no, you killed Bryce in cold blood! He was my protector! He loved me!”

“he loved power, he loved showing how powerful he was!” I argued. She screamed as she shoved past me exiting the stairwell. I found myself watching after her. I pressed my back against the wall sliding my hands through my hair. I wanted to scream, chase after her and tell her to open her fucking eyes, but Bryce did a number on her, on me...

“Steph.” I looked up to see simon leaning against the railing of the stairwell, a grim look on his face. 

“You heard?” I asked. He gave me a look.

“shit kid, everyone fucking heard.” he moved toward me. I gave a humorless laugh.

“great.” I sighed as he stopped in front of me. He patted my head like he was comforting a puppy.

“there, there.” I pulled away from him.

“come on negan’s waiting.” I whispered. The older man shook his head.

“negan said it’s late, he said to get some rest. He'll have a chat with you tomorrow." he slapped me on the back with a laugh. “see what’d I tell you? It was going to be A-Okay.” I could n’t  help but hug him. He tensed up for a moment before hugging me back.

“thanks, simon.” I whispered.  _ Is it me or he smells good?  _ 13 asked. 

“welcome.”  H is grip on me tightened and I felt him rub my back in a comforting manner . I found myself sheepishly pulling away from him.

“well,” I started lamely face burning. “i got to find Gee.” I turned tail running out the stairwell.  _ Was he always hot?  _ 13 asked.

I found Gina sitting on my cot clutching my backpack. She was crying softly. I felt like an ass; I was making my very pregnant friend cry! I sat next to her.

“I'm sorry gee.” she turned to me dropping my backpack and hugging me tightly.

“I was so scared! I heard some savior said you might be a code orange!” she explained. I shook my head.

“Simon found me.” I whispered. She pulled away from me.

“you need to talk to me,” she gave me a light shake. “I’m your friend. I love you.” I nodded. We sat there for what seemed like hours, just holding each other. I let the problems of today melt away. It was for the best, what could I do?                           


	4. realizations hit hard like Semi trucks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steph sees Negan's sweet side, she gets in another fight with Kirstin, and finally she realizes Simon's hot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my friend told me that she get secondhand embarrassment from Steph. Do you guys?

I woke up with a start, the nightmare of Bryce ebbed away from my mind leaving me with a pounding heart a quicken breaths. I sat up looking round to see the majority of workers were asleep. I reached down feeling for my backpack, I searched for my phone, and growled as I realized it was not inside. I realized that I had left it at my secret spot. I thought for a second. i had to get it, it was my only source of photos of my passed loved ones. the saviors would be asleep, so I could just run up there grab the phone and bail out. I found myself quietly rolling to my feet, I slipped on my slippers. I heard gina snort, I froze and turned to them. Richard and gina were sleeping peacefully. I quietly moved toward the stairwell. 

As I got to my spot, I saw in the dim lights my phone was where I had left it. With a victorious whisper I snatched it up, wrapping the headphones around the body. I stuffed it in my short pockets as I turned to leave only to slam into somebody behind me. I let out an “eep” pushing myself away from the person, slamming my body against the wall. Heart pounding, I had been caught! To my utter and complete surprise, it was negan staring down at me. He wore grey sweats and a white shirt; his feet bare. 

“what the hell are you doing up here?” he asked his voice velvety. I heard 13 sighed dreamily. 

“I forgot my phone.” I whispered as I fell to one knee. 

“get up.” he instructed. I did, keeping my gaze on my unicorn slippers. My face was burning, I really didn’t want to see him right now, especially after what happened between us. Stared down at my bare legs, and self-consciously crossed my arms across my chest when I realized that I wasn’t wearing a bra underneath my white tank top. We stood in an awkward silence. 

“I'm sorry,” I spoke up, looking up at him. “I should have never yelled at you. I should have been more grateful that you spared me. You're the leader here, what you say goes.” I felt the heat of his gaze as he studied me. His eyes lingering on my scar, with a quick movement I slapped a hand over the puckered skin hoping he haven’t noticed it. I could feel the tears threatening to spill. “I was scared sir,” I cursed myself. Why couldn’t shut up? “Kirstin hates me. I did something horrible to her a long time ago.” Negan didn’t say anything but watched me. “I did it to save us. but she’s still so fucked up, because...he was a bad person.” I wiped at my cheeks. 

“I know.” I looked up at him. “Gina told me, and I overheard your conversation with Kirstin.” he rubbed at his lips, his eyes running over the length of my body. I felt self-conscious once again. I normally wore baggy clothes to hide my rolls, so standing in front of Negan wearing shorts and a tank top was unnerving. “come on.” he said nodding his head so I could follow him out of the stairwell. I followed him silently studying his back. 

We made it to his room, I felt my heart jump, I thought he was taking me back to the worker quarters! I noticed there were no guards. Negan opened the door and entered the room. I waited outside, just in case. 

“get in here darling.” his voice came out from the dark room. I heard 13 gasp. He wants us in his room! She squealed. Heart pounding, I slowly entered the room. Negan was standing near a coffee table, I looked around noticing a lamp was the light source. I saw his bed was empty but the sheets were tossed about. He made a come here gesture with his fingers, I slowly moved to stand in front of him. “Here.” he held out my notebook, the one I had “lost” cheeks burning I slowly took it from him. There was a majority of fanfiction written in the notebook, and some were nothing but smut. But the small percentage was chapters from my original story. 

“thank you, sir.” I whispered embarrassed far beyond the stars. He sat down heavily on one of the couches, he reached over grabbing a glass full of amber liquor. 

“you’re a fucking good writer.” I looked at him in surprise. “not gonna like, honey, I jerked it to a couple of those stories.” I honestly didn’t expect him to say that. 

“thank you, sir.” I whispered face red. I totally had a new idea for a fanfiction. “I'm honored.” he laughed. 13 was dancing around screaming he likes our writing! Negan downed his drink, placed the cup on the table. He picked up two composition books. 

“here, this is for you.” I stared at the books in confusion. “your punishment is done.” I looked at the books then back at him. 

“sir, not that I'm not grateful, but why?” he smiled his dimples making an appearance. 

“because Simon said you might like this better than lingerie.” he teased. I gave a laugh nodding. I stared down at the books. 

“are you sure?” I asked softly. 

“just take the damn gift Steph.” I found myself reaching over to take the book from his grip. I didn’t miss the way his eyes lingered on my chest. I quickly straightened myself face burning red. His tongue made an appearance from between his teeth. lick me up captain! 13 yelled heart for eyes. 

“thank you.” clutched all three books to my chest. 

“this is a ‘I'm sorry I made you sick’ gift. I put you through something, and I apologize.” I nodded. I thought about the wives, I wondered if they would like their husband giving a non-wife a gift. Kirstin came to mind. 

“Um, sir about Kirstin,” I started. Negan got to his feet. 

“good night darling.” he said as he grabbed my arm pulling me to the exit. This was an obvious our conversation ends here gesture. Once outside, I found myself turning to Negan. 

“Thanks again boss.” I found myself rising on my toes to kiss him on the cheek. I pulled away quick horrified with what I just did. We stared at each other, him a grin on his face me, embarrassed beyond words. without waiting for his reply I ran off. 13 was rolling around screaming that we kissed Negan. 

 

The next few days went by peacefully. I worked off the points I had missed, I wrote in my spare time, I helped around the sanctuary when needed. Negan and Simon were kind enough to acknowledge me when they saw me. Simon liked to chat with me when we crossed the occasional path. Negan would pat me on the head or tickle my chin when he passed by. That made 13 very happy and I was enthralled by it. Gina was getting bigger with each passing day, and soon her baby was going to be here, I was saving my points to get Gina a special gift I had seen at the Market. 

on my next day off early in the morning I made way to the market hoping I could get this baby blanket that I had seen, it was green with a circus animal theme. I thought it was perfect. As I made my way to the vendor, I saw the wives were there. They were getting first picking, which was totally unfair. I saw Arat and Roy where their guards today. That’s when I saw Kirstin pick up the baby blanket. That bitch! 13 yelled as I hurried toward the vendor. 

“stay back!” Roy snapped at me, shoving at me. I kicked him in the shin. 

“fuck off Roy!” I snarled as I shoved past him. The wives turned to me. Kirstin still holding the baby blanket. 

“what the fuck you want?” she asked. I bit my lip looking at the blanket. I knew how this was going to go, but I had to get that for Gina! 

“I need that blanket for Gina.” I said. “May I please get it?” I decide to go with the nice approach, maybe she’ll finally have a soul. She raised an eyebrow and looked down at the blanket. We haven’t spoke at all since our screaming match in the stairwell, and let me tell you the gossip following the event was worse. 

“hmmm... no.” she said clutching the blanket to her chest and smugly smiling at me. Slag! Screamed 13. 

“why the hell not? You don’t even have a baby!” not going to lie I stomp my foot like a child. 

“I don’t care I like it.” 

“it’s the only baby blanket!” 

“so?” losing my patience I reached out grabbing it, she cried out but held on. I yanked it toward me, as Roy came near me, I screamed and kicked at him as he tried grabbing me. 

“I swear to gods that I will kick you in the dick Roy!” I roared not caring if I was catching the attention of nearby saviors or vendors. he backed off. Kirstin yanked the blanket toward her. 

“let go!” she screamed. I pulled 

“no! You're big a person! It won’t even cover you!” I argued, Pulling harder 

“I don’t care, I want it!” she pulled. as we played tug and war with the blanket there was a part of me that was scared it was going to break. I could feel the entire market watching Kirstin and I childish exchange but I didn’t care Gina need this blanket, by gods I was going to get it! 

“you’re being childish you blubbering hasty witted hedge pig!” the insult tumbled out of my mouth before I could stop myself. 

“you’re childish you jerk!” 

“rank fool born giblet!” 

“whore!” 

“Ill-bred swine!” 

“jerk!” 

“you called me that already!” I shouted yanking with all my might, but she somehow managed to cling on. 

“holy shit, what in the fuckity fuck is going on here?” we both turned to see Negan standing there watching us with an amused look. I let go of the blanket, Kirstin stumbled in to the wives. 

“She’s trying to take the baby blanket because I want it!” 

“she’s being a bitch!” we both shouted at the same time. We glared at one another. Negan took a deep breath staring between the two of us. I noticed Simon standing nearby he was covering his mouth with his fist; I had a hunch he was laughing at us. Kirstin and I glared at each other. 

“Steph, why the fuck do you want a baby blanket?” Negan asked. I turned to him. 

“Gina’s due soon and she doesn’t have a blankie for the baby.” I answered truthfully. “I wanted to surprise her with it.” I turned back to Kirstin. “but this... this... Warped villainous canker blossom is being greedy!” 

“fuck you bitch!” Kirstin shouted stepping forward. “I saw it first!” 

“you fucking wish!” I clenched my fist stepping up to her. “You’re not a baby, as much as you act like one.” Simon snorted; Negan grinned down at me. Kirstin shoved me, I shoved her back and grinned as she stumbled again. She raised the blanket as if to hit me with it. 

“hey!” we both turned to Negan. He snatched the blanket from kirstin, handing it to me. As kirstin protested negan turned to her. “Gina needs it more.” he snapped. Kirstin flipped me off. I stuck my tongue out at her. 

“thanks, negan!” I excitedly jumped with joy. I hugged him. “Oh, thank you! I'll tell her it’s from both of us.” I swayed us side to side. I turned running off, but after realizing I didn’t pay, I made my way back to the vendor. Negan and the others still there. I turned to the vendor cheeks red. “How many points?” Simon’s laughter echoed in the quiet market. Kill me now. 13 moaned. 

 

I stared at the vast emptiness in front of me, the walkers chained to the fence filled the area with groans and moans. I shifted my backpack on my shoulder in uneasiness. The light breeze making my skirt flutter around my ankles. I saw a few saviors pass by, they took a look at me and snickered. I rolled my eyes, of course they would think the fight between me and Kirstin was funny. I pulled my zipper of my hoodie up and ignored them. As fat joey stepped in my view, I moved toward him. 

“hey.” I greeted. Fat joey turned to me as I shifted my backpack in the front of me. “I got your cookies.” fat joey gave me a panicked look. 

“oh, Steph!” he looked around before turning back to me. “I forgot to tell you! I'm switching early, so I can’t let you out today.” I sighed. 

“Are you serious? That's why I made the cookies in the first place.” I growled; fat joey looked at his feet sheepishly. 

“I know, I'm sorry, but the boss said I have to go with Gavin to the kingdom.” he explained. I reclosed my backpack. 

“we had a deal, no outside time, means no cookies.” he pouted. 

“next week, I promise.” he said. 

“fine, but this time you’re getting the ingredients, I don’t have enough points for them.” fat joey nodded promising. I reopened my backpack and pulled out the Tupperware. “here at least have one it’s red velvet.” fat joey’s face lit up as he took a cookie. As he happily bit into it, he moaned. 

“Shit, Steph this is good.” I smiled at him giving thanks. He had an alarmed look on his face and quickly kneeled. Confused I looked over my shoulder to see Negan and Simon making their way toward us. I moved quickly next to fat joey and kneeled as well. My skirt fluttering around me. 

“look who it is Si!” Negan stopped a few feet in front of us. “little Steph!” I looked up my heart pounding, a nervous smile pulled at my lips. “hey whatcha got there?” he asked looking at the Tupperware in my hands. 

“red velvet cookies sir.” I answered softly. Even though I've had various encounters with Negan I still got nervous around him. I mean, I hugged him on multiple occasions without thinking and I did kiss his cheek the other day. He told us to stand, we did. “do you want one sir?”I asked shyly as I held out the Tupperware. Negan gave me a boyish grin as he reached for a cookie. 

“dammit girly, you’re gonna make me fucking fat.” he teased as he smelled the cookie. I held the Tupperware out to Simon; he took one as well thanking me. Negan gave a low moan as he chewed, that sound was just enough to send shivers down my body. More please 13 gasped. “shit, doll.” he chewed. “that is good.” he finished the cookie. 

“fuck.” Simon moaned. My heart skipped a beat. I never knew Simon could sound so... sexy? 13 finished. “can I have another one please darling?” he asked sweetly. In a panic, heart thumping I shoved the Tupperware in his hand mumbling: “I have to go.” He looked at me in confusion. “you can have them!” I said as I hurried past them, only to trip, as I slid on the gravel, I knew my skirt had flown up exposing my old pokemon underwear I had on. I jumped to my feet face burning red as I ran, I could hear 13 screaming: Oh no Simon's hot!


	5. The Price of Being Nice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter steph get hurt again, and this time it's not her fault!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so...Steph is totally gonna be in a poly relationship with negan, simon and Nami. my story my rules lol. nami is pretty fun to write. also it's heavy simon in later chapters.

A few days later, I had avoided  S imon , since I realized I now had a crush on him as well. Not to mention I had started writing fanfiction about the mustached man after I had a sex dream about him. I found myself burying my face in my hands and shaking my head.  _ What the hell is wrong with me? _  I thought. 

“ S teph, hurry packing  N egan’s dinner he wants it brought up to him tonight.”  G ina  came up next to me rubbing her belly, she was a few months away from her due date. She had loved the blanket, and laughed so hard that she cried when I told her how I got it in the first place.  “oh, come on honey, you should be happy he requested you.” I pouted as I turned to her. “I know he probably saw your underwear, but at least it was the cute one with the monster thing.” I sighed.

“it’s Pikachu, and that’s another moment to add to my “ S teph embarrasses herself once again in front of  N egan” list.” I said. She laughed. Another cook called  G ina ;  she gave me a pat on the head before running off.

“is it done?” a voice asked. I looked up to see three of  N egan’s wives standing nearby,  R oy  their guard giving me a dirty look. I saw Tanya, and  frankie  standing behind a shorter wife, she was of  asian  descent, she was one of the newer ones, her black hair was done in an elegant pixie cut, her almond eyes dark brown. She reminded me of a doll I had as a kid. I didn’t know this wife’s name.

“almost.” I smiled at her. “Sorry,  G ina  and pops are busy with the dinner crowd.” 

“it’s okay, I'm  N ami  by the way.” I smiled at her.

“I’m  S teph.” as I finished placing the food on the plates, and covering them up,  N ami  stepped up next to me.

“do you need help?” she asked. I shook my head.

“oh no it’s okay,  N egan will get upset if the wives are hurt.” I answered as I picked up a plate.  Nami  gave a laugh.

“ i  insist! It’s not like I'm going to break an arm from carrying this.” she said as she took one plate in each hand. She handed them to  frankie , then handed two more plates to Tanya, she picked up two more, and I picked up the last plate a little nervous. “alright we’re ready.” she told  R oy  as she moved from the kitchen. I followed behind them.

As I entered the parlor behind the wives, I saw  K irstin  sitting next to  N egan at a dinner table. She was leaning into him, looking down at her painted nails. there was a surge of envy, of course  K irstin  would get picked as a wife, she was gorgeous, but I would never tell her that.

“fucking finally!”  N egan smiled at me. “I’m starving darling!” I gently placed the plate in front of him. He groaned as I pulled the top off. It was baked chicken with seasoned green beans and mash potatoes. “did you cook this darling?” he asked looking up at me. I nodded. “oh, shit I'm fucking excited!” he dug into his food, the wives followed complimenting me as they took bites from their food.  Kirstin  gagged, causing everyone to look at her.

“ eww , it taste s  funny, I don’t like it.” she spat out a piece of chi c ken. I took a breath of rage.

“I'm sorry I actually used spices, but I guess your white girl pallet wouldn’t know what those are.” I snapped.  Nami  burst in to laughter. Negan grinned at me. Face red, and realizing what I said, I excused myself and moved toward the exit. Just as I came up to the doors, I stopped short  S imon entered carrying a pitcher of drink.  _ Look at his muscles!  _  13 groaned. My face went hot, my heart sped up.

“hey you,”  S imon  said as he looked down at me. “I haven’t seen you in a while, are you avoiding me?” he teased. I gave a nervous laugh.

“no, of course not.” I felt self-conscious in my old sweater and baggy jeans, even my old sneakers. “I'm sorry I haven’t said hi.” I spoke softly.  _ Why are we so awkward?  _  13 yelled at me.  _  look him in the eye girl! _   “I have to go back to the dinner rush.” I hurried past him, only to slam in to the door  A rat  was closing. Pain shot through my head. I could hear  K irstin scream with laughter, tears sprung in my eyes.

“ S teph?”  S imon  started but I ripped open the door and hurried out. As I moved down the hall, my shoe gave causing me stumbled in to the wall. Growling I continued down the hall with  S imon  shouting after me.  _ Why do you embarrass us so much? _  13 asked.  _ Girl I wish I knew _  I thought back as I made it to the kitchen, I wasn’t surprised that the rubbed sole of my converse had ripped off, I had these shoes for years. Sighing I knew I had to get a new pair at the market, only if I had points for them. 

The next week I once again avoided  S imon and  N egan. I knew that if I saw them that all I would do was embarrass myself once again. I mean the last time cost me a shoe, which I had yet to get new ones, so I just ducted taped what I can and moved on with my life. However, there was an upside to the past few days, and that was  Nami . She had wanted to learn how to cook, so with  N egan’s permission I was to teach her. 

A week ago, I was busy making lunch since it was my turn for the lunch rush,  N egan came with  N ami . He announced I was going to teach her how to cook since I was really good at it. He told me to take care of his wife, patted me on the head and left us with her guard  A rat . Since then we had slowly gotten to know each other. A few days later  N ami  told me she was there when I punched  K irstin. She informed me that she didn’t think it was funny how  K irstin treated me. She thought my stories was genuinely good and asked if she could read more. I had yet to show her my stories, I was too embarrassed someone actually liked them.

 It was kind of hard at first, because a few people that saw  Nami  in the kitchen with me whispered amongst themselves about her being a whore, but hey if that was the only way to survive, shoot I would do it! I mean you get to hang out with  N egan !

As I placed the items for Negan's breakfast on the counter top, I heard a movement behind me. I turned in time to see  N ami  coming up to me.

“good morning  S teph !” she greeted already in her apron; I saw she was still wearing her black dress underneath. I smiled at her.

“good morning  N ami !” I greeted as I picked up the mixing bowl from underneath the counter. She came up next to me.

“ so ,  what’s on today ' s menu?” she asked. 

“an all-American breakfast. Pancakes, eggs, sausages and hash browns.”  N ami  gave a cute. “yum.” I jumped as Simon appeared beside  Nami .

“that sounds good.” he said smiling down at me. I shyly smiled up at him. Heart pounding. _ What is he doing here? _  I thought nervously.

“hi,  S imon .” I looked at the items and turned back to him. “are you helping as well?” he tilted his head. 

“sure. I'm on guard duty today.” I nodded and held out a bowl full of potatoes.

“okay, wash and peel these, please. then we’ll show  N ami  how to cut them up.” he nodded and gently took the bowl from my grip his fingers brushing against mine. 13 groaned: _  I want him.  _ I turned to  N ami , she had a worried look on her face.

“are you okay sweetie?” she asked she reached out placing her  p al m  on my forehead. “you look red.” I gave her a nervous smile.

“I’m fine.” I pulled away from her. “now let me show you the way my grandma used to make pancakes.” she nodded excitedly. As I taught  N ami how to make the pancake batter, I couldn’t help but wonder what a great friend she had turned out to be. Honestly the only friends I had were  G ina and  R ichard , there were a few people I considered friends, but I doubted they considered me a friend. Nami had confided in me a few days ago that she had always adored baking and cooking but she was too busy with school and work to find time to do both, and when the end of the word came, she just ate what she can.

Simon brushed against me as he reached for the cut-up potatoes. I jumped slightly he apologized and returned to cook the hash browns. I couldn’t help but feel nervous as I taught  N ami  with  S imon close by. I knew it was a matter of time before I embarrassed myself.  Nami  gave a small yelp as the spatula fell from her hand.

“sorry!” she bent down to pick it up and stopped to look at my shoes. As she stood up, she gave me a sad look.  “  S teph , what happened to your shoe? Why is it covered in duct tape?” she asked. I noticed  S imon  turned to us. Face red I laughed.

“oh, it ripped. I haven’t had time to go to the market.” I answered.  Nami  gave me a look.

“I'll tell  N egan  to give you extra points for teaching me. I know how expensive shoes are.” I looked at her.

“well, that’s not ne--” she shook her head.

“no way, I'm a  clutz  in the kitchen, and I've hurt you on multiple occasions, you des e rve something in exchange.” she had such a serious look on her face. I could help but laugh.

“okay fine, thank you.” she nodded mov ing  to the sink to wash the spatula.

“ S teph,” I turned to  S imon. “you should have told me.” I looked at him in confusion. “I would have told  N egan  to give you extra points for teaching her.” I found myself patting  S imon on the arm.

“it’s fine, I'll make do. I don’t want to bother the boss man.”  N ami  came back to the stove wiping the spatula with her apron.

“how many eggs did  N egan  want?” she asked.

“two.” I answered as I turned to her. To my horror I watched her pick up my cup of water, not the oil. “NO!  Nami  wait!” I shouted moving toward her. Too late she poured the water in the hot oil. I threw myself at her as fire burst from the pan. She screamed and I hissed in pain as the flames licked at my arm. I jumped to my feet moving toward the fire. I turned off the stove, burning my hand in the process.

“move!”  S imon shouted as he used the fire extinguisher to put out the flames. I cradled my hand. Simon looked at me. He cursed before he blasted me with the white foam. I cried out stumbling back tripping over  N ami , my head slammed in to the concrete. I could hear my name being shouted, then everything went black.

When I came to, I heard crying. I slowly opened my eyes to see I was in the hospital wing. Nami was sitting nearby crying in a white handkerchief,  G ina was comforting her,  R ichard  was looking through an old magazine, his left leg bobbing up and down a nervous tic he had when he was worried about something. 

“another seizure?” I asked. They all looked at me  with  surprise.

“no, baby.”  G ina  said softly getting up to sit on the hospital bed next to me. She took my right hand in hers. “you got hurt making breakfast.” I looked at her in confusion, bits and piece slowly came to me.

“is  N egan mad?” I asked.  Nami  came up to me hugging me as she sobbed.

“oh  S teph ! I'm so sorry! I was so stupid!” I looked down at her sobbing form. I remembered, she put water in hot oil.

“It’s okay. Beginners mistake.” I laughed. she pulled away from me, wiping at her eyes. There was a small smile on he r  face.

“ I' m  glad you’re alive.” I tried to sit up but cried out as my left arm pulsed with pain.

“now, now little lady,” I looked up to see  S imon and  N egan entering the room, Dr. Carson behind them. “you’re fucking hurt no need to wiggle around.”  N egan informed me.  G ina kissed me on the forehead, whispering she would see me later,  R ichard  as well for me to get well soon. Nami gave me a kiss on the cheek before running off after  G ina and  R ichard . I looked up at  N egan and  S imon, worried that he was going to yell at me.

“you’re my new favorite fucking person!”  N egan sang as he sat where  G ina  had vacated. My heart pounded, there was a spike of pleasure to him saying that. I flinched as Dr.  carson  touched my burned arm.  _ Gods,  _ 13 started.  _  look how hot he is!  _ _ Oh _ _  look at  _ _ S _ _ imon!  _  I could see the hearts in her eyes. “you saved my wife.” he smiled at me. “you did a damn good job! Extra points, and I saw your jacked-up shoes, so I'm going to let you get a pair for free!” my mouth fell open.

“wow, but  N egan  that’s not--” 

“necessary?” he finished. “It’s a gift darling.” I looked at  S imon, he had a serious look on his face. I turned back to  N egan .

“thank you,” I gave a hurt moan as dr.  carson  began to undo the dressing on my arm.  I watched dr. Carson for a second before turning back to  N egan . “I really appreciate it. You're really kind.” he had an unreadable look on his face. I gave another hiss and snapped my head to glare at Dr.  carson , why was he being so rough? The doctor looked up at me with a surprised look when I called his name. “tell me doc, how bad is it?” he looked down at the flesh.

“second degree burns on  yo ur hand, first on your arm, we’re looking at a week  or so  for healing.” I gave a sigh. The other cooks weren’t going to like that.

“great, now another thing to have people gossip about me.” I hissed again as he began to slather something on the burns. “gentle please.” he looked at me.

“I'm sorry,  S teph, but I'm going as gently as I can.” I rolled my eyes. I turned back at  N egan  and noticed he was looking at my hair.  ”what’s  wrong?” I asked. Simon sighed and moved next to  N egan .

“Kid, about your hair...” he started sof tl y  as if he was guilty . Confused I reached up to realize that my braid was gone...in fact my hair was now at my shoulders, the ends felt burned. I thought about it, then started to laugh. They gave me a confused look.

“oh, crap! that's why you sprayed me with the fire extinguisher!” I said. Simon nodded. I sighed running my hand through my hair it felt crispy, burned and dry. “it’s okay, I needed a haircut anyway.” I answered smiling up at him. Dr.  carson  finished redressing my arm, as  N ami  came back inside the room with my backpack and a small bag full of clothes. I looked at her in confusion, eyeing my belongings.

“ G ina  said you’re going to need these.” she answered as she came up beside  S imon. I looked at  G ina  as she entered the room as well. I looked at  N egan.

“are you kicking me out sir?” I asked panicked. He looked at me in confusion before roaring with laughter.

“no, baby.”  G ina  said smiling. “ N ami volunteered to be your nurse as you heal.” I looked at  N ami, she nodded smiling up down at me. “ N egan agreed, since …"  G ina  trailed of thinking of a way to put it gently.

“it was my fault you got hurt.”  N ami finished.  Gina  nodded. “ i’ll  take care of you  S teph! I promise, I feel bad that you got hurt.”

“ N ami , it’s fine I have to work though.”  N egan shook his head.

“nope, you have to heal. You're my best cook.”  N egan patted me on the shoulder. “I want  N ami  here to take care of you, it is her fucking fault.”  N ami  nodded, shifting my backpack.

“it’ll be like a sleep over!”  N ami said moving toward me. “we’ll have fun!” she reached out taking my hair in her hand. “ i  used to be a cosmetology student, so I can cut your hair if you want.” she then dropped my hair and smiled at me. “you can teach me how to make a book!  Richard  told me that he taught you.” I nodded again confusion warping through me. Gina gave a sad sigh.

“ i  know it’s for a week, but I'm going to miss you.” I laughed nodding.

“me too gee.” she kissed me on the forehead. “okay you be good, and have fun. I'll visit you when I can.” I shook my head.

“ i’ll  go to you.”  G ina  laughed, gave me a hug and turned to  N ami.

“take care of my girl.”  N ami  nodded.

“ i  will I promise.” with that  G ina  left. Negan got up, gave me another pat on my head.

“ i’ll  see yah later, doll.”   S imon did the same and with that they were gone. I turned to  N ami  who sat where  N egan had been sitting.

“is this a dream?” I asked her, she burst in to laughter.


	6. Good Times in the Parlor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> steph see how life is in the palor. she's not usd to the pain medication, oh and nami totally makes her move.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> do i feel bad torturing Steph? would i be a bad guy if i said no? i also like writing Simon and negan being all nice and sweet.

The next few days passed very slowly; I couldn’t believe I was going to say this and sound ungrateful; but it was boring. I wasn’t allowed to leave the parlor, so I couldn’t hide in my spot to write,  or  draw. I was always watched, and felt self-conscious when I pulled out my books. If I did write it was after dinner, or when it was Nami’s turn with Negan, so I waited in the parlor as they got it on in the room.

On the other hand,  Kirstin was very vocal about me staying with them and bitched to whoever listened. She would mock me if she saw my notebook.  The other wives were getting tired of her so they started to tell her to shut up. So that was nice.   I spent my time daydreaming about  S imon and  N egan or thinking of new stories.

here I was bored out of my mind sitting in the parlor next to Nami as she painted my fingernails, she was speaking about her old friends  and old gossip around the salon .  But I couldn’t concentrate on what she was saying,  I felt the intense glare from Kirstin, she was sitting on the other side of us.  I ignored her as I read a book that Nami had let me borrow it was a historic romance.

Nami had wanted to play dress up, and me being the pushover I was, I let her. I was dressed in red  luna  lace plus size dress, with chunky black heels. Nami had cut my hair in a long pixie hairstyle due to the damage of the fire. She had painted my lips in a dark plum color and put make up on me. My face felt heavy. Also, Nami insisted that I shave my legs instead of wearing black  leggie’s  under the dress, so there was that.

“why is she even in here?”  K irstin snapped. All the wives turned to her. “she’s not a wife, she's a worker; she should be downstairs.”  N ami rolled her eyes.

“ N egan allowed her to be here. I'm taking care of her as she heals.”  N ami  explained yet again. Kirstin rolled her eyes.

“look I'm not too happy to see your dopey face either.” I informed  K irstin . “so just ignore me and I'll ignore you.”  K irstin  flipped me off. I sighed and returned my gaze to the book I was reading.

“ignore her, she’s just mad  N egan hasn’t fucked her in days.”  Kirstin  gave a growl before running off to the bar near the wall. The other wives let out a few snorts. 

“hello wives!” a jolly voice made us jump.  “and little  Stephie .” _  Speak of the devil _  sighed 13. Negan entered the parlor smiling,  S imon at his side like usual. His eyes widen as they landed on me. “holy shit! Look at you.” he said. I slowly stood up,  N ami at my side  beaming brightly.

“doesn’t she look amazing?” she asked. “twirl for us!” I felt my face burn as I twirled.  Negan  whistled.

“doesn’t she look nice Si?” he asked.  Simon  was smiling down at me. He nodded.

“yep like a princess.” I gave a soft thank oyu.

“don’t be shy  S teph,”  N ami wrapped an arm around my waist giving me a soft squeeze. “you look amazing!”  a strange feeling pulsed through my arm, and pain started to bloom , I looked down at it in the sling. “what’s wrong?”  N ami asked.

“my arm hurts.” I answered.  Nami  nodded.

“time to change the bandage and a pain pill.” I gave a boo

“those things make me sick.” she sighed.

“either complain about the pain, or feel no pain and complain about the side effects.” I pouted.  Simon  laughed.

“come on, I'll help you.” I nodded. As I moved toward  N ami ’s  bedroom,  K irstin kicked out her foot tripping me, I gave a cry as I landed hard on my knees, pain shot through my right arm, turned to fall on my ass glaring up at the bitch.

“what the fuck?” I snarled. “ I  know you’re horny as fuck, but I'm not to blame bitch!” her eyes widen  at what I said, I tried to kick her but she moved out of the way . I shook my hand, trying to rid the pain that pulsed there, it was my writing hand so I was beyond piss. 

Negan gave a  deep breath , and  S imon took a breath. Nami was at my side, pulling my dress over my knees. My face went red when I realized I had just flashed my  cootchie  to  N egan and  S imon, at least I was wearing cute underwear this time. 

“I fucking hate you.” I snarled at  K irstin. Negan grabbed her roughly by the arm dragging her toward the exit,  S imon helped me up.

“are you okay?” he asked softly. I nodded.

“yeah, she’s just a bitch.” I muttered; my left arm  pulse with pain, it was more intense than it had been earlier.  Simon and  N ami led me to her room. Seeing  N ami’s room gave me a relief, I really didn’t like to sit with the wives, I didn’t like the way they looked at me, or whispered amongst themselves, sherry was really nice. She had helped Nami sometimes, and seemed genuinely interested in me.  The other seemed to tolerate me, because Negan was being nice to me, except Kirstin that bitch just hated me.

I sat on the bed  removing my arm from the sling  as  N ami went to get the first aid from her tiny bathroom. Simon pulled the desk chair to sit in front of me. I smiled at him as he took my arm in my hand.

“ I' m glad you’re standing up for yourself.”  S imon said softly. I watched as he undid the bandages on my left arm. “I really hate how she bullies you.” I looked at him in surprise. “sadly, we can’t do anything, but Negan has been putting her in line.” I tilted my head at him. Simon took the first aid kit from  N ami. Frankie poked her head in the room.

“hey  N egan wants to talk to you  M imi.”  N ami nodded, patted me on the head and exited the room. Simon gently rubbed the aloe Vera on my healing burn.

“thank you for being so nice to me.” I whispered heart pounding that he was actually touching me. 13 was whispering what she wanted him to do with his fingers. I clenched my thighs together, why was this so arousing?   S imon looked up at me. “I can handle  K irstin.” I informed him, hoping he didn’t  see me  being a total pervert .  He gave a small nod as  He gently wrapped my arm in a thin gauze.

 I watched as he applied  A loe  V era to my hand, being a gently as possible, as I gave a whimper  of pain; this one hurt the most . He looked up at me apologizing. I shook my head. “it’s okay.” he gently wrapped my hand in the same gauze. He handed me a painkiller pill and glass of water on  N ami’s side table. I took it, almost immediately the effects of the pill made me loopy, and light feeling, it was weird... did all the pain killer pills feel like this?

“ S teph, darling.”  I  looked up to see  N egan enter  N ami ' s room with  K irstin at his side, she looked as if she had been crying. “Kirstin here has something to say.”  K irstin had her arms across her chest.

“ I' m \--”

“don’t,” I raised my right hand to stop her. The medication made me feel bold. Maybe I should use it every day. I gave that thought a giggle. “I don’t care, you will always be this way, you’ve been this way since we were kids, you'll be this way until I die. I don’t want your apology, I just want you to leave me alone, and if you don’t, I will fight back.” I looked at  N egan , he was swaying. “if you give me permission.” the room tilted;  Negan  looked down at me a look of surprise on his face.

“nothing physical. I can take bitching and arguing.” I nodded. I turned to  S imon ;  he was swaying as well. I reached out taking his face in my hands.

“why are you  swaying ?” I asked. “stop, you’re making me dizzy.” he gave me a confused look but smiled. I looked back at  N egan, he pointed to the parlor and  K irstin  left. 

“oh no, someone’s not used to these pills.”  S imon  said reaching up to take my hands in his. I shook my head.

“ I  wasn’t allowed to take pain killers as a kid, my grandpa thought medicine was the devil’s creation. So, when he would beat us, he’d make us sleep through the pain.” I answered. I looked at  N egan. “he was an asshole.” I felt as if the room spin. I giggled  I felt like I was on a roller coaster, it had been years since.. . “did I ever tell you I think your cute? The both of you?” they looked at me in surprise. I sighed and let go of  S imon, I lifted my leg to undo my heels. “how do people  fucking  walk in these?” I muttered. I held my leg out to  S imon. “please?” he slowly took my ankle in his hand, undoing the buckle on the heel. Sighing I flopped on back on the bed.  I gave a small moan as his hand glided down my  ankel  removing my shoe .  Why would  nami  dress me up I'm not pretty... a song I loved came to mind, it was one I listened to all the time in  highschool .  “ I'm  sorry I'm not pretty,” I gave a giggle  as I sang . “ I’m done feeling worthless, imperfect You hit me where it hurts You put the blade right on my wrist  And  slit until it spurts out Blood red, dead.” I sang. I looked at  N egan who had c o me up next to me he was crouching down.  There was this look on his face, I reached out  ktouching  his beard.  “ i  used to listen to that song, it’s by  Snøw  &  Teqkoi  - I'm Not Enough  And  I'm Sorry.” I felt the fatigue that came with the pills. “am I enough?” I whispered to  N egan, and turned to  S imon, I heard them say something but the darkness of sleep swept me away.

The next day I was sitting at the dinner table between  N egan and  N ami, we were waiting for our food. I gave a sigh as  K irstin spoke of a college memory, a memory that actually was mine.  I was trying to remember what happened the night before, but those damn pills always made me forget, or really loopy.

“so ,  I'm dancing on stage, and the crowd is going wild.” she smiled. “I was amazing.” I rolled my eyes, was I a bitch enough to tell her to stop lying? “right  S teph?” she batted her eyelashes at me.

“sure, if that was true. You never got the lead roles I did. Also, Alberto hated you why would he let you star in his play?” I asked feeling cranky. The pills were doing a number on me and  Kirstin was pissing me off .  She had thrown a fit when  Negan  requested that I sit next to him

“he casted me after you graduated!” she snapped.

“oh right, I did graduate years before you did  ‘cause  I couldn't stand your dumb ass.”  K irstin glared at me, I ignored her and yawned in my hand. Negan gave a laugh , he leaned down his mouth near my ear. 13 gave a moan. 

“I’m glad you’re standing up for yourself.” he whispered, I felt my go red. I turned to him. He wrapped an arm around my shoulders careful not to touch my hurt arm.  _ Please touch me  _ _ dow _ _ \--  _  I cut 13 off with a warning thought.

“I’m sorry I'm being catty.” he laughed and shook his head.

“I like you being tougher.” in the corner of my eye I noticed Kirstin glaring at us. Negan looked up as Simon entered the room.

“all right dinner is served.”  S imon sang as he  held up a tray of food . I gave an excited gasp as I saw Gina behind him.

“Gee!” I shouted jumping to my feet running to her. She placed the roasted chicken down before catching me in her arms. “I missed you!” I whined. She laughed hugging me tightly.  Simon  placed the platters of food down on the table.

“oh, girl I missed you too!” I pulled away, a pout on my lips as I  looked up  at her.

“they keep giving me these pain pills and I can’t remember anything when I take them!” I whispered.  “ also  I haven’t written in days.” I whined.  She gave me a soft smile. I turned to  N egan. “can  G ee stay and have dinner with us please?” he smiled. “she can sit in my chair and I'll sit on the floor!”  N egan laughed.

“darling we can get more fucking chairs.”  N egan informed me. I gave a  squee  and pulled  G ina  toward my seat.

“oh,  G ee, tell me how you and  R ichard are.”  G ina laughed.

“girl, you’ve only been gone for like three days.” she informed me. Simon placed a chair next to mine so  G ina  was between me and  N ami. I helped her sit down.

“are you sure? It feels like weeks.” I said as I sat down. She nodded.

“yes, S tephie . It's only been three  days.” I gave a sigh and leaned forward whispering.

“it’s boring here.”  G ina  patted my cheek.  as I sat back in my seat, I thanked  S imon as he served me food. I found it strange that he was doing it, but then again  Gina  was a guest. 

“girl be grateful you can rest.” she scolded in a playful manner. I nodded. She reached out taking a strand of hair in her hand. “you look so different! I'm so used to you having long hair.” I  laughed .

“yeah, it’s easier to take care of.” I told her as I took a bite from the chicken breast. I found myself looking down at my food and then back at  Gina . “did you make this?” I asked she nodded as she shyly took a bite from her food, I couldn’t help but noticed that the wives were watching her, I felt a little defensive about that. “aren’t you guys hungry?” I asked them. Kirstin sneered at me.

“hi  G ina , long time no see.” she snarled.  Gina  looked at her.

“hi.”  G ina  replied with no emotion then turned to me. “we all miss you in the kitchen baby. It's too quiet without you.” I smiled.

“really? Even pops miss me? He said my cheery deposition annoyed him!”  G ina  nodded. 

“yes, pops even misses you.” as we ate  G ina  and I chatted about the last three days.  Gina  made a comment about my makeup. 

“ N ami’s been practicing on me.” I answered as I leaned back in my seat full. My thigh brushed against  N egan’s and I had a mini heart attack quickly sitting up.  _ Touch him again! _  13 shouted.  _ He's so warm! _

“it look s  good, but wash it off before you go to sleep.” I nodded.

“yep  N ami taught me how.”  I smiled up at  simon  as he took my plate away. “ so  what’s going on in the kitchen? Did Mari tell Dejon that she liked him yet?” I asked. Gina shook her head and told me about the gossip in the kitchen. The others listened with  intrest ,  negan  putting his input when he was nosy. 

“that girl is as clumsy as you when she talks to  dejon  almost spilled my baked potatoes to the floor  cause  she was so nervous!” we laughed.  Kirstin gave an irate sigh , which earned looks from the wives and Negan, even  simon  looked at her . We both turned to look at her before turning back to each other. “oh, do you think I can borrow your sewing kit? I ripped my backpack again.”  G ina nodded.

“sure, I can bring it up tomorrow.” I reached out hugging her again. I really missed my friend.  “but you can just get a new one at the market they’re like super cheap.”  G ina  informed me. I rolled my eyes.

“they don’t have really cute ones, only the plain ones.” I stated, I hugged her tightly “I have so much to tell you.” I whispered.  Gina  nodded.

“yes, girl I need the tea.”  she whispered back. we both burst into laughter.  Kirstin  gave another irate sigh.

“I'm trying to eat.” she snapped at us.   Before  negan  could scold her, I gave a growled and turned to her. I had enough with her snarky quips and rude behavior.

“gods shut up Kirstin! the fucking world does not revolve ‘round you!” I snapped. A few of the wives snickered. I turned to Negan. “may I please be excused? I want to catch up with  Gina .” Negan nodded wiping his mouth with his napkin.

“go ahead, we’re done with dinner anyway.” he smiled at me. 

 “thank you.” I patted him on his shoulder, got to my feet and pulled  G ina  toward  N ami’s room. Nami followed behind us, telling me that we had to show  G ina , the dress she had gifted me. 

Once in  N ami’s room, I plopped on the bed,  G ina next to me and  N ami went to the closet to get the baby gifts  we had got  at the market. Gina was ecstatic with the baby gifts.

“the extra points that  N egan gave me for teaching  N ami to cook came in handy!” I smiled at  G ina as she held up a baby on e sie.

“girl,” she started turning to me, that’s when I noticed the tears. 

“ G ee?” I asked softly. She threw herself at me sobbing.

“you didn’t have to.” she cried. “you could have used these points to get new shoes or a backpack, you know take care of you.” I gently rubbed her back in comfort.

“you’re my best friend. The closest thing to a sister.” I answered. “I love you.”  G ee pulled away wiping her eyes she took my face in her hands. 

“I’m grateful girly, but I want you to take care of yourself.” she scolded. I smiled at her nodding,

“Okay.” she turned to  Nami .

“you make sure she uses her points on her.”  N ami  nodded.

“ I  will.” I pouted.

“I like helping you out.”  G ina  sighed.

“I know you do Steph.” she folded the baby clothes. “but I have  R ichard he takes care of me. You have nobody, you have to take care of yourself.” I nodded. She kissed me on the cheek. “thank you.” the rest of the night we chatted, until it was time for bed. As I walked  G ina to the workers area,  S imon trailed behind.

“Steph,”  G ina  stopped grabbing my arm. I turned to her. “You’re okay right?” I tilted my head in question. “with  K irstin?” I gave a sigh.

“she hates me, I hate her, if she tries anything  N egan will shut that shit down.” I looked over at  S imon. “him too.” he smiled.  Gina  looked at  S imon.

“you take care of my girl.” he nodded.

“of course, ma’am” he smiled at her. “boy scouts honor.”  G ina  laughed, she turned to me and kissed me on the forehead.

“be good.” I nodded. With that she moved toward her bed. I turned to  S imon , missing my friend already.

“don’t worry a few more days, and you'll be free from  K irstin .” I nodded.

“I’m sorry I'm a bother.” I found myself whispering. He clamped a hand on my shoulder leading me back to the parlor.

“you’re not a bother,  S teph .” he answered. “you’re actually a breath of fresh air.” I laughed. He shook his head. “I’m serious.” I looked up at him, 13 giggling at how cute he was.

“ T hank you , S imon.” I smiled up at him, he nodded.

A few days later, after a hospital visit. I was cleared to return to work. Nami argued that I should rest one more day before leaving. Negan agreed, he wanted to be sure. I was excited to see  G ina , but at the same time I knew the gossip that surrounded me was going to heavy, not to mention all the nosy people that would ask questions. I was so not ready for that.

After dinner I packed my bags, I felt this sadness. I was going to miss  N egan and  S imon, not to mention  N ami  and sherry. They seemed to genuinely like me. I gave a sigh as I pulled on my strawberry sweater. There was an excitement that I was going to be able to write now, and draw without people looking over my shoulder. I jumped when there was a knock at the door, I turned to see  S imon enter.

“hey you.” he greeted. I smiled up at him.

“hi.” I said shyly.  _ Hello you  _ _ hot _ _  piece of muscle! _  13 moaned. He held up a pair of shoes.

“I got these for you.” he held them out to me. “since your other ones are broken.” I stared at the shoes in shock as I moved close to him. The shoes looked in excellent condition.

“these are  steve  madden catch wedge sneakers!” I exclaimed as I took them from his hands. “no freaking way!  I always wanted a pair! ” I stared down at the sneakers in wonder, they didn’t even look used! I looked up at him. “Are you sure!?” he laughed reaching out to ruffle my hair. 

“of course. I thought hey what’s the best gift for you.” he answered. “ I' m  gonna  miss  seeing  your squishy face  every day .” he laughed pinching my cheek. I couldn’t help but giggle.  _ He’s  _ _ gonna _ _  miss us bitch! Kiss him! _  13 shouted. I clutched the shoes to my  chest,  I felt this overwhelming feeling of insecurity take over. “hey what’s wrong?” he asked softly.

“why are you so nice to me?” I asked moving away from him and looking down at my feet.  Simon  reached out taking my chin in his hand.

“I told you.” he moved closer to me. “people like you deserve the best.” he forced me to look up at him. My heart pounded against my rib cage.  _ Kiss him! Kiss him! Kiss him bitch!!! _  13 screamed.

“hey!” we pulled away from each other as  N egan  entered the room. I found myself quickly wiping at my face. I smiled up at him as he came close to me. “hey, what's wrong doll?” I shook my head.

“just  go ing to  miss  N ami is all.” I answered. He laughed.

“so, I guess me and  S imon are just passing thoughts.”  N egan  gave a faux sad sigh. I laughed. He clutched at his chest. “you hurt me my dear!” he teased.

“no! Of course, I'm go ing to  miss you guys! You guys are so cool!” I answered as I placed my new shoes in my duffel bag.  “ i  mean I'll still see you guys around, right?” they  noded

“okay good because I got you this!” I turned to him . In each hand he held items. In his right  was  the cutest backpack I've ever seen , in his left was a pair of Converse sneakers that were purple with unicorns on them.  I gave a gasp moving up to him.

“no way! That's a lounge fly  P ikachu  backpack!” I reached out grabbing it. “I wanted one of these before the walkers!”  N egan let the bag go as I brought it to my chest in a hug.

“and these are the pair of shoes I promised you.” he sang handing me the converse. I took them shyly. They looked brand new too.

 “thank you ,  Negan !” I giggled as I hugged him. He patted my head.

“I’m glad you like it honey.” I pulled away from him to turn to  S imon. “Look!”  I said holding up my gifts.  he nodded  with a toothy grin. 

“ I  know, he wanted to give you sexy panties.” I looked at  N egan he shrugged.

“ S imon  said this was a better gift for you.” I turned back to  S imon  hugging him as well.

“thank you,  Simon .” he hugged me back.

“welcome, kid.” as we pulled away  N ami  enter the room. she looked between all three of us.

“what’s going on here?” she asked. I turned to her as I pulled away from  S imon .

“they got me gifts!” I said excitedly as I held up my new backpack and shoes. Nami smiled at me. She kissed Negan on the mouth as she moved passed him, there was that hit of envy and jealousy but she was his wife! I couldn’t be mad about that. _  I  _ _ wanna _ _  kiss  _ _ negan _ _!  _  13 whimpered.

“alright boys,”  N ami  said as she sat on her bed. “I’m sleepy.” the two men patted me on the head before leaving the room. I watched as  N egan closed the door. I moved toward the bed, ready to move the items from my old backpack to the new one. There was a slight pain in my arm. I found myself rubbing at it. “it still hurts?”  N ami  asked. I nodded as I sat down. She reached over to her side table picking up the bottle of pain killers. I pouted at her. “just take one.” she whispered. I nodded. I took the pill as requested and felt the effects of it starting to hit me. “I’m going to miss you Steph.”  N ami  whispered, she laid down next to me. I turned to her, she was weaving in and out of my vision.

“me too. You're really nice.” I whispered turning to her. She smiled at me. “ I' m  glad  N egan had such a nice wife.” I told her. She sighed.

“ I  don’t like being his wife, but if the only way to survive then be it.” she said. I shook my head. 

“he ’s  so cool.” she laughed.

“you don’t know him like we do honey. Besides I miss pussy.” I laughed.

“me too. I can’t find cats around here, it’s like they stay away from the factory.”  N ami stared at me a second before laughing.  “I miss having pets.”

“no baby,” she whispered moving closer to me.  “I  mean pussy, pussy.” she then kissed me on the mouth. I gave a small gasp, as she pulled away from me.

“you  don ' t  like cats?” I asked. She gave another laugh.

“ i  like you.” she whispered again as she kissed me again, I felt her hands move to my thighs. I pulled away from her to look at her roaming hands. “do you like me too  S teph ?” she asked softly. I nodded.

“yeah! You’re so nice, and pretty.” I gave a soft moan as her fingers slipped into my sleeping pants. “that feel nice.” I whispered. She kissed me on the neck. 

“I want to make you feel nice , S teph.” she looked at me. “can I make you feel nice?” she asked. I nodded.

“okay.” she looked at me with a smile and pulled her hands from my pants, I watched her as she moved to pull my pants off my legs. “what are you doing?” I asked. She looked  up  at me.

“I’m going to make you feel good.” she whispered before burying her face in my arousal. As pleasure made way to my drug induced mind, I saw colors and stars, I saw the planets and 13 floating by, her pupils large and pulsing. She was muttering. I felt something coming fast, and with a small cry I was hit with nothing but pleasure. I was back on the bed staring at the ceiling  N ami  was kissing me. “touch me please.” she whispered and I did.

I woke up to a pulsing headache. I slowly sat up to see I was naked gasping I quickly brought my blankets up to my chest, I looked around in a panic, then saw  N ami , she was naked as well. I looked around in confusion.  _ We had sex with  _ _ N _ _ ami _  13 whispered. The first thought was when? My second was  N egan bashing my head in. With a small whimper I quickly dressed. I moved quietly as I grabbed my bags as I opened the door, I hear  N ami  whisper my name. With a panic I bolted out of there. As I moved out of the parlor, I slammed into  N egan.

“good morning to you darling.” he grinned down at me. I nodded, looking anywhere but his face. “I heard from  N ami  you had really good dreams last night.” I gave a weak laugh.

“those pills, they do that.”  muttered I cleared my throat.  Negan  laughed.

“well, I guess I'll see you later.” I nodded. He hugged me. I stiffened up. I felt guilty. I had slept with  Negan 's wife while high on pills! I gave him a quick hug before hurrying off. I rushed toward the workers area, heart pounding. This was something I knew I had to keep to myself, or  N egan  would kill me.


	7. It Was Only A Kiss How Did It End Up Like This?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> stephanie faces nami, she wrestles with her feelings. simon talks to her and Kirstin is a cunt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i honestly have no idea where this story is heading, i normally do outlines or chapter break downs but nope i'm just writing. tell me if you guys even like this story.

 

I avoided  N ami the next few days, there was a part of me that was angry at her. Also i started to remember the events that night, her moans, her encouraging words, the pleasure she had given me…there was a part of me that kind of liked what happened, but I was too embarrassed to admit it. It honestly kept me up at night, so I decided to confide in Gina. My best friend was horrified, and told me that I was basically raped since I was drugged up. I cried, telling her I had no idea what to do. Gina had grabbed a knife ready to take out Nami, but I had to remind her that Nami was  Negan ’s wife. Gina told me to stay away from  N ami and that I should tell  N egan . I told her that I didn’t want no more drama so I was going to keep my mouth shut, since I was only a worker. Gina hugged me tightly and told me that I was the strongest person she knew. That made me feel a little better.

So,I found myself keeping my head down and making sure to stay out of trouble. I made sure to keep away from  N egan  just in case he found out the truth, and I avoided the wives like the plague. However ,  Nami kept making excuses to come down to the kitchen, and Gina being the awesome friend she was covered for me as I hid away. 

At a moment of weakness I found myself looking for  S imon , I felt I should at least talk to somebody. But fat joey told me that it was his turn for outpost duties and he wouldn’t be back for a while.  _ It’s for the best.  _  13 told me.  _ He shouldn’t be brought in our drama. _

I was stressed out to the point I asked for a day off, I had to calm down .  signs of my stress  seizures  were close , the pins and needles in the back of my neck, the tremors in my hand.  Gina being the head of the kitchen granted me a day off.

So, I decided to go and paint. Was I good at painting? No, but hell I needed to get out of my own head  for a few hours . I made cookies for fat joey and he let me out in the field. I made sure to stay close by, and away from anything suspicious. 

As I sat on my knees in front of my canvas, I stared at the greenery around me, I noticed the old broken-down bus nearby. It would be the perfect subject. I took a deep breath as I placed my colors on my pallet, I had to stop thinking about  N ami, and maybe  N egan  would never find out. 

As I  painted  on the small canvas I had bought from the market, I thought of the colors and objects in front of me. I thought of the trees, the old rusted bus, the green grass,  S imon  as he approached me. I took another look, yep  S imon  was making his way toward me, a grim look on his face. I cursed.

“what the hell are you doing out here by yourself  kid ?” he asked as he came up next to my canvas. I stared up at him, worry running through me.

“Don’t tell  N egan please.” was the first thing that spilled from my mouth. He raised an eyebrow as he crouched down in front of me. “I just wanted to paint.” he studied my half-painted canvas; it didn’t look so good. I was really embarrassed that  S imon  was looking at it. “I thought you were going to be gone for a while. Hey how did you find me?”

“Nah, I had to deal with something.  Easy I saw fat joey eating cookies and questioned him . He told me your guy’s deal. ”  I pouted.

“Are you going to take me back?” I asked  sadly. He shook his head as he continued to study my painting. Took a look at me and  smiled , before looking back at my canvas.

 “Nope, but can I give you some pointers on the painting?” he asked looking back up at me. I nodded excitedly. I had heard a rumor that  S imon  knew about art, so I was excited for him to teach me.

“sure.” I studied  S imon  as he spoke about color theory, and shadows, and scolded me for shading with black.  _ He’s so cute...  _ 13 agreed with me.

“so, if you mix the colors early on, it will be easier for you.” he smiled at me. I smiled back.  “Also I noticed you’re using acrylics, so those will dry faster than oil.”

“thanks,  S imon .” I found myself feeling shy, he was so close. I looked back down at my painting. I noticed that  S imon  had painted a bit on the bus, it looked amazing, so much better than what I had done.  The bus had the correct perspective, and the colors were well blended, not to mention it looked like a photograph pasted on the canvas!  “wow! That's so cool!” I said pointing to the bus. “It looks like the real thing!” He smiled shyly.

“thanks. I paint occasionally.” he worked on the bus as I tried to fix the foliage. “are you okay steph?” he asked. I looked at him in wonder. “you looked really stressed out the last time I saw you. I'm worried you’re gonna have another seizure.” He was studying my face,  S imon  had a knack for knowing when people lied to him. I gave him a nervous smile. 

“yeah, I'm fine. That's why I decided to paint, you know, to calm myself down.” I answered meekly. “some stuff happened a few days back and it’s been on my mind.” I continued to paint, the memories of Nami flooding my unprotected brain. I shook my head trying to get rid of the memories. I felt  S imon  watching me as I continued to paint.  _ Just look at him. Oh please _ _ Kiss him or Fuck him or Ride his mustache! _  13 shouted at me.  _ Do something other than embarrassing ourselves! _

“like what?” he asked. I felt his gaze on me , it was intense as if he was trying to read my mind . I silently cursed myself. “did someone touch you?  Did  Kirstin  hurt you again?”  his voice went grave and threatening. I shook my head. To o embarrassed to look at him. 

“no! Nothing of that sort.” I reassured him as I turned to him. A small smile on my lips, I was glad that he care d  about me , but all saviors had to care about their people . He studied my face. “I guess I'm just being dumb.” I gave a laugh but he just stared at me, as if waiting for me to spill the beans. “well, I kissed someone,” I started softly deciding I should tell him, but skim the truth. “but I don’t know what it means.” I felt my tears rim at my eyes. “the person is married to someone else.”  S imon ’s mouth opened in shock.

“holy shit little steph is a home wrecker!” he laughed. I shook my head.

“ Well… it’s  more like they kissed me.” he tilted his head to look at me.

“richard kissed you?” he asked I shook my head.

“she...”

“oh shit gina?”

“no!”  S imon  laughed.

“didn’t think you liked girls.”

“well, I like both, I’ve known that since I was 12, but,”  S imon  raised an eyebrow, but didn’t say anything. “but I have this crush on someone, well I have a crush on two people, but one’s married and the other’s… i  mean,  there’s no way in hell that they would ever like me back, cause they’re like so cool--” I started to ramble. “Anyway, she kissed me…and I don’t know how to feel about what happened.”

“What do you mean?” He asked softly. I felt all these emotions flood me at once.

“Please don’t tell  N egan, but I was high on my pain pills, and she…ate me out…and we had sex.”  Simon ’s eyes widen.

“Did you say yes?” He asked softly. I couldn’t look at him. I was too  embarrassed .

“I don’t remember until I saw us naked…I knew what happened…then I started to remember.”  S imon  took a breath. “but, I’m so confused. I liked it  S imon .” I finally looked at him. “Why did I like it?” I felt the tears fall from my eyes. “I’m so confused.” I started to cry.  Simon  reached out taking me in his arms, I stiffened a second before relaxing  in his hold . 

“What Nami did was wrong.” I snapped my head to look at him. “Steph, it’s obvious, come on.” He thought for a second. “She should have made her move when you were sober.” I nodded.  Simon  went quiet again as if thinking what to say next. “But it’s  N egan I’m worried about. He doesn’t condone rape, as you know that’s a big rule here. And she cheated on him…so which one outweighs which one ?  So ,  is she going to be killed or is she or you going to get the iron?” I gave a small scared whimper. “I know.” He gave me a reassuring kiss on the head. 

“What do I do?” I asked. He sighed.

“I say talk to Nami, and both of you should talk to  N egan .” 

“What if he gets mad? What if he kills  N ami ? Or me?” He looked down at me a worried look on his face.

“ Negan  likes you, he said you’re a real good cook we can’t lose that. he wouldn’t kill you , b eside s N ami raped you.”

“Is it rape if I enjoyed it?” I asked softly toying with the button on his shirt. “Am I gross?” I asked looking up at him.

“No,  you’re not gross. ” he said softly. “I think you just wanted companionship and took it in whatever manner it was handed to you.” He whispered. “I think you subconsciously liked her, and now that you had a intimate moment with her, you don’t think it was rape…but sweetie it was, even if you liked it, even if you enjoyed it, you were high. You had no idea, until the next day.” I gently pulled at his button.

“ Simon , I’m a mess. The rumors are going to fly if this gets out, I’m always the talk of the sanctuary because i’m so stupid.” I muttered angrily. I looked up at him. “Why are you so cool?” He scoffed. “No for real, you didn’t even judge me.” He gave me a soft grin.

“Why should I judge you when you never judged me.” He said softly. I couldn’t help but smile up at him. “You’ve always been so kind, and caring, you never complained or argued with me. Sometimes when you looked up at me with that innocent, adorable smile I had to stop myself from doing this…” he leaned down, and pressed his lips against mine. I was so taken back that I froze for a second. 13 screamed in glee as  Simon s  arm tightened around me.  _ Kiss him back you fool!  _ 13 shouted, so I did. I closed my eyes and kissed him back. I gave a moan as his hands moved to my waist, my hands clutched at the front of his shirt. 

A part of me was ecstatic, but there was a part of me that was embarrassed  since I really never kissed anyone, well I mean only in high school and the occasional dates in college .  Did I even know how to kiss? Was I kissing him okay? I gave a small moan as he  pressed himself against me, when something hard poked me in the stomach; a realization hit me.  I pulled away face red ,  embarrassed  beyond time . 

“i’m sorry!” I  said  in panic  pulling away from him , as I jumped to my feet. “I’m so sorry  I kissed you !” I started to pack my belongings, except for the canvas, I left it and without another word I ran off.

“But I kissed you!”  S imon  shouted after me. “Steph!” I didn’t stop, I ran.

As I came up to the gate, I noticed  N egan  and a handful of men moving toward the trucks, and since I wasn’t used to my new three-inch soles. I stumbled and tripped, a pain shot through my ankle and I landed hard on the gravel.

“Steph!”  N egan’s voice caught my attention as I rolled on my back. I laid there staring up at the sky, cursing myself. I was trying to catch my breath. I flinched as  S imon  fell to his knees next to me. He stared down at me in concern. I groaned as I sat up,  N egan was by my side, next to  S imon .

“damn girl why were you running?”  He asked as he reached down to grab my wrist, he looked at the cuts and scrap es  on my palms.

“I told  S imon  I could beat him in a race.” I was surprised how quickly I came up with that. Negan raised an eyebrow and turned to  S imon . Who gave a nod.

“and may I ask what the hell were you doing outside of the gates?” I looked at  N egan . Okay I don’t think I could lie twice.

“i was teaching her how to paint.”  S imon  answered, I noticed he was holding my canvas and pallet of paint. “She asked me to give her a few pointers.” I nodded. Negan stared between the two of us, but didn’t say anything.

As I climbed to my feet I cried out, a sharp pain ripped through my ankle.  Simon  moved to my side. My face red with the fresh memory of our kiss. When he wrapped an arm around my waist, 13 screamed in glee begging me to kiss him again. Negan moved to grab my leg, he moved my ankle this way and that, I whimpered in pain.

“I think you broke it darling.” he said looking up at me. I cursed.

“great.” I muttered. “Not only I embarrassed myself but I broke my fucking ankle.” I yelped as  S imon  swung me up, carrying me bridal style. He grinned down at me, I looked away embarrassed. Negan stood up smiling down at me.

“come on now sweetness,”  N egan  said as he leaned down. “It’s not that bad.”

“but I just got back to work! And I need points.” I argued. He gave me a pat on my head.

“let’s see what the doc has to say.” I pouted. I was never going to get the typewriter at this pace.

“it’s a grade 1 sprain.” dr. Carson informed me. “now I recommend the RICE treatment. **** Rest: especially in the first 24 to 48 hours, Ice: for the first 48 hours for 20 minutes at a time, Compression : wear a  [ brace ](https://www.betterbraces.com/ankle-injuries/ankle-sprain-instability)  or a wrap that is snug, but not cutting off circulation, Elevate: above the heart as often as possible.” I had a feeling he was reciting that from a book he read. I nodded. With that he left the room.

“fine.” I took a peek at  S imon  and  N egan they were sitting nearby, talking quietly to one another. I jumped when  gina  stormed in,  S imon  and  N egan watched her quietly.

“again!?” she asked  as she came up to the bed . I smiled up at her.

“ Soooo , how are you? ” she shook her head.

“girl, you are going to be the death of me!” I waved a hand at her

“I’m fine.” she gasped taking my hands in hers.

“this does not look fine!” she scolded staring at my scratched-up palms. The doctor had cleaned them up and put disinfectant. “what happened?” she asked.

“i fell.” I answered.

“we were racing.”  S imon  answered. I turned to look at him thankful he was covering up for me. I nodded turning back to gina.

“I guess I'm not used to my new shoes.” gina shook her head.

“steph, this is the second time you’ve been in the hospital wing!.” I gave her a reassuring smile.

“i’m fine I promise, it was a grade 1 sprain I'll be right as rain in a few days.” she sighed.

“okay,” we all looked up as  N ami came in the room. I noticed a look that flashed on Gina’s face. I reached out grabbing her arm, knowing that she would take her anger out on  N ami. Gina turned to me, I gave her a pleading look. Gina took a deep breath, and turned to  N ami. She bid good bye to the guys, but ignored the wife. Nami watched after  G ina  before turning to look at me.

“hey steph,” she said softly, I nodded at her. I found myself looking at  S imon . He gave me a nod, as if saying that I was okay. I slowly looked back at  N ami as she spoke up. “I heard you were in the hospital wing, I wanted to talk to you.” I nodded. Negan tapped  S imon  on the shoulder as he stood up.  Simon  stood up and moved toward me, he smiled down at me.

“okay, ladies we’ll let you talk.”  N egan turned to  N ami. “take care of her.” she nodded.  Simon  reached out smoothing my hair from my face. He didn’t say anything but his expression said it all. I watched him leave with  N egan. Nami moved to sit on the bed next to me. I waited until the guys were completely out of sight before I spoke.

“you took advantage of me!” I whispered harshly. She nodded.

“I’m so sorry.” she reached for me but I recoiled. “I really like you steph! I never meant to do that when you were drugged! I couldn’t help myself; you were so cute.  I only gave you one pill! I thought you would remember… ” I shook my head.  “I really, really like you.”

“do you have any feeling what it’s like to wake up naked and with no memory of it?” I asked. She started to cry. I sighed pushing my hair from my face. 

“I’m sorry. I always had a crush on you. I couldn’t help it.” she whimpered wiping at her eyes.  Nami  did look adorable crying, what was I saying? I watched her cry. I felt bad, but at the same time I need to tell her how I felt. I reached out poking her shoulder.

“look, you’re  N egan ’s wife you know how messed up this is?” I asked. She sniffled. “I could get killed or worse burned!” she sniffled again. 

“if I had asked would you  have  slept with me?” she asked. I studied her face .  yes, she was beautiful; yes, I was attracted to her, but shit she was married! To the guy that I wrote dirty  fanfiction  about!  But I didn’t really know the answer to that question.

“ i  don’t know!” I answered. “maybe? I guess? No?” she stared at me with a sad pout. “am I attracted to you, yes. But you’re married.” I reached out to take her hands in mine, I took a deep breath. “Nami, I like you too. But what you did was wrong. I’m up for having sex with a pretty girl, but I wa nt to  remember the experience. Now if you weren’t married and you asked me sure!” I squeezed her hands ignoring the pain from the scratches. “But what you did was wrong, and  N egan  wouldn’t like what happened between us.” Nami studied me, her eyes red from crying.

“You like me?” She asked softly. I nodded.

“Yeah! You’re pretty, and funny and you like books—“  N ami  leaned down without a word kissing me on the mouth. I gave a yelp pushing her away. “ Nami ! Did you not—“

“well, fuck me sideways what a fucking sight!” my heart skipped a beat, I turned to see  N egan  standing at the door way, he was leaning against the threshold, arms crossed, his tongue peeking between his teeth. The tingles of my seizure began to make way at the back of my head. “don’t stop on my account.”  N egan  teased moving toward us. I guess he saw the panic look on my face. “calm down doll,” he said softly. “I don’t want you to get a seizure now.” I took deep breaths.

“I should go.” I muttered as I tried to climb off the bed.  Negan  gently pushed me back on the bed.

“no you don’t.” I gave a pathetic whimper. “calm down honey I just want to ask a few questions.” I looked at  N ami. She was looking down at her heeled feet. “now I couldn’t help but overhear your conversation. Tell me what happened.”  N ami didn’t say anything. I looked down at my sprained ankle wondering if I could run on it. When we didn’t answer. He snapped his fingers. “answer the fucking question!” we both jumped,  N egan  turned to me. “steph?” he sang. 

Nami looked at me and nodded as if she was giving me permission. I told him everything, the word spilled out like vomit, I couldn’t stop, he scared me! Once I was done  N egan  looked between me and  N ami. 

“so you two had sex?” he asked.  Nami  looked away from him crossing her arms across her chest. I nodded hesitantly.

“don’t blame  S teph,”  N ami finally spoke up. “I took advantage of her when she was drugged up.” I stared at  N ami in horror,  N egan  did not condone rape.  Negan  looked at  N ami, his gaze going dark.

“So you raped her?” He growled. I saw the way he clenched Lucille.  Nami  looked at him in his eye.

“no! I wanted it.” I spoke up before she could say anything. “I liked it. I like  N ami. It… it was consensual .”  N ami’s head snapped to look at me she had this incredulous look on her face. I didn’t want her to get hurt, I mean people make mistakes, right?  Negan  looked between the two of us.

“now, I'm not going to fucking lie, but the thought of you two is just...” he growled. 13 moaned in response. I bit my lip. Okay he sounded sexy.  I had to get out of here, this stressful situation was not helping me.  I found myself standing up from the bed, my ankle protesting in pain. He reached up stopping me. “But I can’t let this go unpunished.” I swallowed hard, staring up at him. I nodded.

“I have to go.” I started and hobbled away from the two. “I forgot I have to do dinner today.” I lied. I grabbed my backpack. “i’ll see you guys later.”  Negan  reached out grabbing my arm.

“oh, you certainly will doll.” he growled. I didn’t say anything but nodded. I hobbled away once he let me go. After that I went to my spot to get away from the emotions and the tension, and the first time in my life I wrote a journal entry.

Hours later, I found myself carrying a tray of food to my spot. I really didn’t want to confront anyone. I just wanted to be alone. As I ate, I wrote in one of my new composition book  N egan had given me, it was just a journal entry.  I forgot how freeing it felt to write out your emotions and your thoughts. I jumped when a shadow moved into my vision. I looked up to see  K irstin . She just stared down at me. How did this bitch find my secret spot!?

“hey.” I greeted closing my book and stuffing it in my backpack. She looked down at my shoes and then took a glance at my backpack.

“so , t he y  gave you the shoes, and the backpack I wanted.”  K irstin  stated. I took a deep breath. “I heard you’re a carpet muncher now.” I grit my teeth. _ That bitch! Who told her about  _ _ nami _ _? _  13 asked. I thought about it. Maybe the hospital wing wasn’t empty.

Fuck off  K irstin .” I snapped.

“i have no idea why he likes you.” she laughed. “i mean you’re a fat, pathetic nerd, that’s now a lesbian.” she shook her head. “i always knew the way you looked at me.” I  stared at her, laughter bubbled from me, I was not laughing at her. She stared at me with a confused look.

“ i  would die before I ever had feelings for you.” I snapped. “I would slit my wrist if anyone asked me to sleep with you.  You are not worth anyone’s time. ” she gave me a dark look before kicking my food in my face.  She gave a laugh and  turned to leave . _  fuck her up!  _  13 screamed.  I jumped to my feet and shoved her down the stairs. My eyes widen as I  realized what I just did. I  watched her roll down the steps , it was like time had slowed down. I stared at her lain out on the bottom of the stairs, she wasn’t moving.

“what the fuck steph?” I jumped at  S imon ’s voice. I turned to see him standing behind me.

“she made me mad.” I answered. We both looked over the railing to see  still  at the bottom of the steps. “is she dead?” I asked .  him he glanced down at me. Kirstin let out a whimper reaching up to grab at her head,  her sobs echoing in the stairwell .

“nope, let’s go.” he grabbed my arm moving to gather my things. He dragged me out the emergency exit pulling me down the hall.

“what about her?”  S imon  shrugged.

“she got what she deserved.” he answered. “one of the wives will find her.” I couldn’t help but feel this overwhelming feeling of guilt, to the point I started to cry. I didn’t want to kill her, just hurt her. But what if she was hurt really bad? What if I fucked her up real good? Wha if she died of her injuries later? 

Simon's grip on my hand grew tighter. He ignored the looks that the passing saviors were giving us.  Here I was covered in food, being dragged down the hall, all the looks and whispers were getting to me. The hot tears came out and streaked down my face.  I gave a sob and he stopped .  I crashed in to his back , as I pulled away, I saw I had left food stains on his khaki shirt . He turned to look down at me. His gaze softened when he realized I was crying.

“Steph,” he whispered placing his hands on my shoulders. “it’s okay. She's fine.” I looked up at him.

“Frankie pushed her down the stairs three days ago too. That bitched survived that too.” I wiped my eyes with my sleeve.

“really?” I asked. He nodded.

“yep, they got into fight and Kirstin said something racist. Frankie just shoved her.”  S imon smiled down at me. “trust me.” I nodded. He looked around noticing the looks we were getting in the hall. “come on.” he whispered as he took my hand again and led me down the hall. I had to jog to keep up since his long legs took large strides. I panted as he stopped at a room down the end of the hall, I hear a jingle of keys and he opened the door, pulling me after him. 

As he closed the door behind me I saw we were in an  apartment . I  lo oked  around in awe. It was a large studio type of room, a small kitchenette, a door leading to the bathroom, a large bed near a window, there was a desk pushed up the corner covered in paper and art supplies, a canvas with an  unfinished  painting near the desk, a bookshelf nearby over stuffed with books. A small couch across the bookshelf with a coffee table between.

_ He took us in his apartment! _  13 shouted jumping in excitement.  Simon  let go of my hand, moving pass me to the cabinet. He pulled out two glasses and a bottle of liquor.

“make yourself at home.” he said as he poured the drinks. I moved to the couch taking off my backpack. I looked down  at my food covered sweater, wondering if the stains were going to come out . Sighing I reached up to feel my hair, yep food was stuck as well. “if you want to take a quick shower, the bathroom’s right there.”  simon’s  voice caught my attention, he  point ed  to the closed door near me.

“do you mind?” I asked softly. He turned to me shaking his head, as he took a sip from his glass.

“nope, I saw what she did. I'm glad you stood up for yourself.” he said  with a toothy grin.

“Thank you, but she was so mean! She called me a carpet muncher!”  S imon raised an eyebrow. “that’s just...homophobic and- and-and horrible.” I told  S imon. He nodded. “she’s racist too! She called  G ina the n word once! I let  G ina beat her up , she never uttered it again after that . ” I smiled at him. “Oh!  And she called me a wet back  or beaner  when  we were  a kid!” I started to cry. “she’s just horrible! Why does  N egan like her?” I asked sobbing. Simon moved toward me hugging me. 

“gods,  I'll have a chat with Negan about her .” he stated rubbing my back. I hugged him back. “now, I wished she snapped her neck.”  I snorted pulling from him.  He grinned down at me, I saw  remnats  of food all over him.

“wait! I got food all over you!” he shrugged pulling away.

“ i  don’t care, I get covered in stuff worse than this on  runs.”  he stated and began to unbutton his shirt.  I froze as he popped a button open, chest hair peeked at me, my face went red.

“i’m going to take a shower!” I informed him quickly as his bare torso begun to show. I turned hurrying to the bathroom door. The sudden memories of our kiss flooding me, as well as the arousal and desire for him. _ Girl we have a chance!  _  13 shouted.  _ Did you see his chest??? _

“towels on the rack are clean.” he called after me as I closed the door. Heart pounding, I pressed my back against the door.  _ Simon _ _  is ripped! _  13 shouted.  _  jump on him and make out with him!  _  she demanded. With shaking hands I pulled off my sweater moving toward the shower.

Once I was done with my shower, I hear  S imon  knock the door. I quickly wrapped my body in the towel cursing how small it was. I moved  toward the door.

“yes?” I calle d .

“here, you can borrow these.” Simon said his voice slightly muffled. I slowly opened the  door  S imon thrusted a roll of clothes through the crack. I took them thanking him. I closed the door moving to unroll the clothes, they were a old sleeping shirt and grey sweatpants.

Once I was done dressing ,  I exited the bathroom,  S imon was sitting on the couch his bare feet on the coffee table, drinking, as he skimmed  an art  book. He looked up at me smiling as I moved to sit next to him.

“hey they fit.” he said as he moved  his  feet from the table, I noticed he was still shirtless. 

“yeah, thank you.” I whispered. He handed me a glass of brown liquid. I took it hesitantly, I never drank alcohol, not even in college, since I was trying so hard to leave early so  Kirstin  could leave me alone.

“ rum, for your nerves.” I thanked him again and took a sip. I shuddered at the taste, but liked how it warmed up my stomach, after the third  sip  I felt lighter. “do you like it ? ” he asked I nodded turning to him.

“oh very much.” I told him, my face feeling warm, and my head light. I held out the glass. “more please.” he laughed and poured a little more in my cup. I took another drink. “you know my grand father  would tell me and my cousin that alcohol was the devils piss?” I gave a giggle. “he was an ass.”  S imon  nodded.

“you told us that before.” he took a sip of his drink. “why’d you live with him? Where was your mom?” he asked. I looked down at my cup tears watering my eyes.

“my mom got pregnant with me at 14, my grandfather kicked her out and took me away, my grandmother was terrified of my grand father . He took my cousin away from my aunt, because she wasn’t married with her  boyfriend.“  I informed  S imon I took another drink. “you see my grand father  was rich, like really rich, so that’s why he won all the custody battles. My mom really wanted to be a part of my life, but my grand father  didn’t want her ‘corrupting me” I took another drink, I was nervous I never told anyone about grand father . “when I turned eighteen, I went to find my mom, she had been living with my dad nearby with her in laws. He was so mad, but I was 18, and I was glad to have my parents back in my life , even if it was for a short time .” I held out my cup to  S imon, he poured more rum for me. 

“what happened to your cousin?” he asked. I shrugged.

“he was a few years older than  me .  You know,  grand father  found him wearing  my  grandma ’ s  dress and beat him. ..he tried to beat “the gay away” but Alex  wasn’t  gay...  That night  Al e x  woke me up kissing me on the head and saying he was sorry, that he couldn’t be happy , that he loved me very much . He ran away with his girlfriend. ” I smiled at the thought of Alex running toward his freedom. “ The last thing I heard of him was that he was now a she , very  happy and was expecting a baby ! ” I smiled. “but now? I don’t think she’s alive.” I downed my cup holding it out to  S imon, he gave me a soft smile before taking the cup from my hands  and placed it on the table next to him . I pouted at him, I wanted more. It made me feel bold and no longer anxiety ridden.

“I think you had enough,  Hone y. So, what happened to your grand father  and parents?” he asked. I gave a sigh.

“i don’t know about mom and dad they moved away after I graduated college,” I whimpered wiping at my face as the tears fell. “but grand father  died before the end, a heart attack.” I gave a giggle  as my head felt light . “feel funny.”  S imon smiled at me.

“well you were downing that rum like no tomorrow.” he teased. I moved closer to him, suddenly feeling cold.  He didn't move away, but leaned closer.

“don’t be mean,” I whimpered. “I had a hard day.” he sighed. I started to cry again all these emotions just forced themselves through me.  Simon  leaned close to me wrapping an arm around my shoulder pulling me close. He comforted me as I cried. I found myself spilling everything to him, about  N ami’s confrontation and  N egan catching  N ami kissing me. “How’d he know to stay behind?” I asked looking up at  S imon , he looked down at me. “Did you tell him?”  Simon  shook his head

“ Negan ’s good at reading people,  he probably saw the way you were acting around Nami, ” he answered taking a sip from his cup. “He told me to do my duties and that he wanted to ask you about being outside.” I “ohh’d” 

“He said  he  was going to punish me.” I whimpered fear making way. “He’s going to burn me!”  Simon  gave a sigh and rubbed my arm in comfort.

“I don’t think  so, honey.”  I shook  my  head.

“no... i know he is! ” I  hiccuped . “she’s  a wife! She can’t be punished .” he laughed.

“Believe me kid ,  the wives get punished. A few days in the cell or a scary tongue lashing.” I tilted my head as I thought about it.

“The cell?” I asked softly. He nodded.

“Yep started it the day after the screaming match you and Kirstin had in the stairwell. He puts them in the cells, dressed in gross and stinky sweats, feeds them like only bread and water while blasting some really annoying song.” He gave a snort. “Kirstin still hasn’t learned her lesson ;  she’s been in there at least ten times.”

“That bitch is too stubborn for her own good.” I laughed. He laughed with me nodding his head and drinking.

“Can I have some more rum please.” I whispered. He shook his head.

“Nope, you’re already drunk.” I shook my head.

“No, I’m not.” I whined. He laughed and leaned down kissing me gently on the mouth. 13 groaned.  _ Touch him, touch him.  _ When he pulled away  i  stared up  at him in awe.

“Why did you kiss me?” I asked face feeling really hot.

“ I kissed you cause I like you kid.” he whispered.

“really?” he nodded.

“yep.”

“why?  I suck! I embarrass myself all the time! ”  He laughed squeezing me.

“Well, I think it’s cute.” He stated. “you’re like an adorable bunny, all cute and small, then when we get close or scare you ,  you zip away.  Negan  thinks so too ;  he calls you bunny in secret.” I stared at him mouth open in shock. He laughed nodding.

“Negan has a nickname for me?” I asked softly. 13 was ecstatic.  Simon  nodded taking a swig  from his cup .

“It’s suits you, you panic a lot.” He kissed me on my head. “Also to why I like you, there are tons of reasons why, but  few  stick out.” 

“ A few ?” He nodded.

“The first time I saw you, when we rescued you, and how you threw yourself at me?” I nodded. “I saw how loyal you were, you were willing to sacrifice yourself to protect your friends. The other time, remember when I was really sick?” I nodded.  “ you  were the only one besides  N egan to visit me, and you made me soup because you wanted to. Also, made me cupcakes when you found out it was my birthday, like who goes out of their way to make somebody feel special?” I studied him looking for a clue he was just trying to make me feel better. “But what really did it for me was the night I caught you crying in the library.” I looked at him in confusion. “You were with Gina and you were crying about some savior making fun of you. Gina wasn’t preg nant  yet, I think, but Gina was ready to throw hands, and you stopped her, telling her to leave it alone that you were fine you just needed to cry. A few hours later I saw you with that same savior, both of you laughing like old friends. When I questioned it, he told me that you saved him from being crushed by the truck he was under. He stated that you could have let him die, but you helped him, he felt bad and apologized to you, and that you made him golden brownies.” I stared at him ;  I did remember that day.

I had just been at the sanctuary for half a year, I was they only fat person there, I was made fun a lot by the other saviors but I ignored them.  Kenny  was a savior that liked to rip on me, and he made me cry  a lot . one day I was passing him as he worked under his truck, and I heard him yell for help, I guess the jack had moved, so I pulled him out from under the truck saving him. He was so surprised that I didn’t let him die, that he apologized, and as a thank you I made him and his wife golden brownies since chocolate is really hard to find. He still a good friend, but I haven’t seen him since he was moved to the  satellite outpost a few months ago.

“You are so big hearted and loving, that you are willing to help people despite what they did to you.”  Simon  said softly. “That’s why I like you.”

“But I hurt  Kirstin . I punched her, called her names, I shoved her down the stairs! I’m not a good person.” He laughed.

“Okay first of all, that slag deserves it. I mean you’re like a fucking puppy! Who the fuck messes with a puppy?” He asked. I laughed. “Besides all the good you do, you’re allowed to be bad  at least once in a while.” I found myself snuggling deeper into his hold. Taking in the way he smelled like faint cologne, and the sun.

“Thank  you , S imon.” I whispered feeling incredibly flattered and shy. “can you kiss me again? Please?” I whispered. He nodded leaning down to kiss me softly on the mouth. I smiled through the kiss. “you’re mustache tickles.” I whispered. He laughed kissing me once more. “I think I'm drunk.” I stated closing my eyes feeling tired. Simon nodded. 

“oh my dear you are.” I smiled again when I felt him kiss me. “now go to sleep, you need your rest.” I nodded snuggling on his bare chest, his hair tickling me. I felt him kiss the  crown  of my head, while  whispering  good night. I drifted to sleep listening to his heart  beat.


	8. The Big Deal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter Steph gets an offer she can't refuse. She finds out a secret here group has been hiding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, so i decided that Nami will be the antagonist, and the story will be sort of au. i honestly have no idea where this story is going, but i do know i want Nami to be the bad guy. nami haters this is for you.

The next morning ,  I woke up in  Simon' s bed. I sat up, looked around in confusion before remembering the day before. I groaned as I slumped back on the bed. The memory of Kristin at the bottom of the stairs hit me like a truck. I cursed sitting up surprising  S imon. He turned to me with alarm, I saw he was cooking and was dressed for the day already.  _ We slept in  _ _ Simon' _ _ s room!  _ 13 excitedly shouted.  _ He kissed us and said he liked us! _

“sorry, I just remembered  K irstin and how she probably told  N egan already what happened.”  S imon laughed as he pushed scrambled eggs on a plate. “What time is it?” I yawned.

“oh that? Nope, apparently she told  N egan  that she tripped.” I shook my head. “It’s past eight, I thought I should let you sleep in.”

“Thank you , S imon.” I scoffed at the thought of Kirstin. “of course, to save her own ass. She probably doesn’t want to be punished again.”  S imon nodded.

“yep.” I climbed off his bed stretching. The smell of bacon made my stomach growl.

“do  you have an extra toothbrush?” I asked moving to the bathroom. Simon nodded.

“yeah under the sink.” 

I felt this nervousness seep from me as I sat across from  S imon. We ate breakfast in silence. I was thinking about Kirstin and wondering if I was going to get the iron because of  N ami . I jumped when I heard a walkie go off near us. Simon reached at his waist.

“ S imon  here.” he answered.

“hey, if you see Bunny bring her to my room.”  S imon  and I looked at each other.  _ He called you by the nickname!  _  13 squealed. Tears of fear started to rim my eyes, oh no…the punishment. 

“is she in trouble?”  S imon asked. We heard  N egan laugh.

“nope, just want to talk to the kid.” I shook my head.

“no.” I whined.   S imon  gave me a look that assured me I was fine.

“will do boss.” he put the walkie back on his belt. “he probably just  want s  to talk to you about  N ami. You know dig deeper, he doesn’t tolerate rape, he probably just wants to make sure it was consensual.” I pouted as I ate a piece of bacon. “or, maybe it  _ is _  about Kristin.” I choked on my bacon. “ i  was joking.” he laughed reaching over to pat me on the back.

“not funny!” I coughed.  Pouting up at him, he gave another laugh before pecking me on the mouth. 

“Oh ,  I washed your clothes.” He stated as he reached down by his leg picking up a brow n  paper bag. “ So , N egan doesn’t question why you’re wearing my sleeping clothes.” I nodded shyly taking the paper bag from him.

“Thank  you , S imon.”

As we approached  Negan' s room  door, my  heart sped up.

“Oh,” I started softly stopping  S imon stopped to look at me. “Look at that I forgot I had… to …vote…” I said and turned to run, but  S imon caught me tsk- ing  his tongue.

“nope,  nope, my little puppy.   if you run you will get punished.” I pouted up at him.

“help?”  S imon  laughed. He pulled away from me crouching down so we were eye level. 

“trust me. Please.” I took a deep breath.

“fine, but if it’s bad news I get to kick you.”  S imon  nodded, then kissed me on the mouth in a quick peck before standing up.

“okay, good girl.” he said as he knocked the door. My heart hammered in my ribcage. I heard  Negan' s voice. Simon opened the door and entered pulling me after him. “got the cutie right here boss.” he said cheerfully as he closed the door behind us. Negan was sitting on his couch dressed in a white shirt and black pants, his feet bare.

“there she is!” he greeted standing up.  “thank you , S imon, you have duties to attend to.”  S imon nodded patting me on the head before leaving. I whimpered after him, he turned to me with a n  assuring look before closing the door after him. I slowly turned to  N egan.

“I have a proposition for you.”

“she kicked food in my face that’s why I pushed her.” we said at the same time. He raised an eyebrow in question and I stared up at him in  confusion .

“ what ?” we said again.

“this isn’t about  K irstin ?” I asked. Negan shook his head.

“no, should it fucking be?” he asked smiling. I shook my head quickly.

“nope, forget that slag.” I answered quickly. “so ,  how are you?” I asked smiling up at him relieved that I wasn’t in trouble, and glad that  S imon was right.

“sit down darling.” He nodded his head to the seat behind me. I nodded and moved to sit across from him. He sat down and gave a whistle. I jumped as  N ami exited from the bathroom.  _ Okay, not good. _  13 whimpered. Nami went to sit down next to Negan, she gave me a small smile and wave. I nodded to her. I turned to  N egan. “now, as I said. I have a proposition for you.” I nodded. I wondered if he wanted me to his personal cook. That would be fun.  _ Hmmm maybe he wants you to teach  _ _ N _ _ ami to cook again!  _ 13 suggested.

“okay.” I said softly. Negan smiled at me.

“we spoke all night, me and  N ami  here. She is going to be punished for what she did.” Nami nodded watching me with big eyes. he wrapped an arm around her shoulder. My heart sped up.

“Punishment?” I repeated. He nodded.

“Oh yes,  N ami will spend two weeks in the cell for her awful behavior.” I looked at  N ami relief flooding through me. She wasn’t going to get hurt, and I wasn’t getting the iron.  “Now I found out that my dear wife here is unhappy.” I turned to  N ami, she nodded. “And I thought, that of this awesome idea.”

“Okay?” I looked between the two. Negan looked happy and Nami had this unreadable look on her face.

“what if I asked you to be a ‘special friend” to my dear wife, but I do have to ask since I'm a fucking greedy boy, to watch and join on occasion ,  with your permission of course. ” I stared at the two confused I tilted my head trying to understand what  N egan was saying. Negan gave a soft laugh. 

“special friend?” I asked. Nami nodded finally smiling at me. I turned to  N egan

“oh baby, you’re so cute.” he stated smiling at me. “what I am saying,” he leaned forward letting  N ami go, resting his forearms on his knees. “is I want you to be a fuck buddy to my  N ami here, and with your permission I would like to fucking join on occasion.” my eyes widen at his words.  _ FUCK BUDDY! _  13 screamed.  _ He wants us to be a fuck buddy!  he wants us to be  _ _ Nami' _ _ s fuck buddy 13  _ i  snapped back  to her .  _  bitch he wants to join too!  _  I noticed that they were staring at me expectedly. 

“like a wife?” the word spilled from my mouth. 13 screamed at me to shut up. Negan shook his head.

“no, baby. Just a fuck buddy for  N ami. Apparently ,  my dear wife here is bi, but leans more toward woman, I'm not complaining since you’re cute.” I looked at  N ami face heating up. “now, if you decline ,  I would have to give  N a mi  a harsher punishment like the iron since she technically raped you and cheated on me, but if you take this deal her punishment won’t be as bad. I will reward you, with your own apartment, and more points that you’re getting now.”

“ so ,  I won’t have to work?” I asked softly.

“ Yes and no,  if you like working then you can work when you want,  but I will request dinner be cooked by you since your food is really fucking good ;  but you’re main job will  be  fuck ing  my wife.” I stared at the two. This had to be a dream. I found myself  digging  my nails in my palms the pain ripped through my hands, nope not a dream.

“Why a ha r sher punishment if I decline?” I asked softly.

“Because it shows me the truth.” Was all he said. I stared at  N ami, she was giving me a smile, but I saw how scared she really was. If I declined it would prove that she raped me and if I accept it will prove it was consensual…  _  forget that _ _ , _ _  girl _ _!  _ _ you will fuck  _ _ N _ _ egan! We wrote about this! We want this!  _  13 screamed.

“this is...” I tried to think of the words but my mind was swirling with all these insane emotions. “an amazing offer, but...” I struggled with the words. “ i  have to think about it.”  N egan  laughed nodding.

“I understand, we threw this at you with no preparation at all.”  N egan  said softly. “you have until tonight to give me an answer.” I nodded moving to my feet. 

“i just want to talk to  Gina and think about it .” I whispered. He nodded.

“of course ,  darling see you later.” I looked at  N ami, she blew me a sad kiss. I felt heat rush through my face, as the memories with her made way. I bid them good bye and ran off. 13 screaming with joy, and I was on the verge of an attack, panic? Anxiety? Stress? I don’t know but maybe all three, but had some sort of under lying excitement.  _ Hey didn’t we write one about being his sex slave?  _  13 asked.

“ G ina!” I shouted bursting in the kitchen. “ G ina!”  G ina hobbled over to me worried.

“baby? What, what is it? Is it  K irstin ?” I shook my head grabbing her arm and pulling her into the pantry, I noticed Richard was in there doing inventory. He looked at us in confusion as I closed the door.

“you guys,” I started turning to them. I spilled the conversation I had with  N egan to Gina and  R ichard . They both stared at me with wide eyes.

“do it!”  R ichard  said smiling. “shit you’ve had a crush on him for years now.” he said excitedly. Gina hit her husband on the arm he looked at her. “what it’s true.” 

“would it make me a slut?” I asked softly , Hearing the phantom voice of my grandfather telling me I was a disgrace.  Gina laughed.

“no, but he would take care of you baby. I mean look at the wives.”  G ina  took a breath placing her hands on my shoulders. “if you decide to do this, just be prepared for all the gossip and assholes coming your way.” I nodded.

“will you think of me differently?” I asked. Gina shook her head.

“of course ,  not baby. Remember I was a stripper before I became a police officer?”  R ichard nodded. 

“yeah my baby got the moves.” he said kissing Gina’s cheek. I laughed. I nodded.

“thanks guys.” I hugged them both before turning to leave.

“be safe!”  G ina called after me as I left the kitchen heart pounding. As I moved toward  Negan' s room, I thought about the proposition. Maybe this would help me, maybe the extra points would help  G ina too once the baby comes. 

 A whisper of doubt made way in my mind, and I found myself moving toward my spot instead. I paced in my spot for a few hours, thinking and fighting with 13. I argued how was I to be a sex buddy ,  if I didn’t even know anything remotely about sex just what I wrote, and that I never even had a sexual experience! That it didn’t count with Bryce and Nami since it was… I shook my head, shaking the memories from my mind. 

I gave a groan as I sat on the ground, I slid a hand through my hair and thought of Simon. He had admitted to like liking me. What did that mean though? I mean he kissed me, a lot...

I groaned again and threw myself to the ground. I was going to upset  S imon if I took this deal ,  right? I pushed at my eyes with my palms,  N egan was hot, so was  S imon! But  N ami wo u ld get a harsher punishment! Would I be greedy if I just agreed for  N egan? What if he thought I was too fat? What if thought I was gross? I gave a groan again and rolled side to side. When did my life get so complicated?

“what the hell are you groaning like that for?” I looked up with a start to see  S imon looking down at me, in his hands he held two trays of food. I sat up quickly as he sat down next to me. I took the tray he was holding out to me. “I was hoping you would be here, I wanted to have lunch with you.” 

“Thank you.” I said softly placing the tray on my lap, I looked down at the chicken sandwich, slices of apples and homemade chips. Simon smiled at me before digging into his meal. I had to tell him I couldn’t keep it in the dark. “ S imon,” I started softly. He turned to me. “  N egan offered me a deal of some sorts.”  S imon nodded.

“I  know, he told me.” I turned to him.

“do you hate me?” I asked softly. He laughed shaking his head.

“what? No!” he gave me a swift peck on my mouth. “it’s a good deal.” I stared at him confused, he sighed placing his sandwich down. “look, I know how hard it is to live out here. Am I jealous? Hell yeah, but I know he can take care of you. Beside you’ll be Nami’s girlfriend.. . wife? Not  Negan' s, so I'm cool, I'll be like your side piece.” I laughed.

“you’re okay with it? What if  N egan asks me to have sex with him?” I asked.  S imon nodded continuing to eat his food.

“Well,” he started as if thinking what he was going to say. “I mean, I have a feeling you’ve had  very  few sexual relationships, being shy and all, so this could be good for you. yeah, I’m okay with it. I mean I know you have a crush on  N egan, you do write fanfiction about him. We can just keep our relationship secret until he says something.” he pointed to my tray. “now eat!” I nodded smiling at him. 

“I actually started to write  fanfiction  about you.” I admitted shyly, he froze with his sandwich I in his mouth and turned to me with why eyes. He lowered his sand which.

“really?” He asked looking flattered. I nodded. “Hmmm, maybe you should let me read it sometime.” I gave a small nod and dug in to my food. We ate in a comfortable silence. Once we were done,  S imon turned to me. 

“so ,  you made a decision?” he asked I nodded. “good, his mood will be better.” he climbed to his feet pulling me to mine. He gave me a quick kiss on the lips. “ I  have to go but I'll see you later okay?” I nodded shyly. He took my face in his hands, peppering kisses on my face. “okay?”

“okay!” I giggled. He gave me one final kiss on the mouth before letting me and leaving. I picked up the trays and our juice containers moving toward the cafeteria. As I exited the first floor ,  I crashed into  N egan  and his men.

“hello darling.” he greeted smiling down at me.  There was a part of me that want to take off, but I had to talk to him.

“hi.” I said shyly. He took the trays from my hands and handed them to Davey next to him. Negan then wrapped an arm around my shoulders he led me toward the  stairwell .

“now, my fucking adorable bunny, ” 13 screamed with glee bouncing off the walls. “ did you think about my little proposal?” he whispered softly leaning down so his mouth was near my ear. I nodded  face  red . “that’s fucking great!” he said as he led me down the hall. “and?” I looked over my shoulder to see his men looking at us with wonder. Negan looked over as well. “oh? Shy?” I nodded. “okay.” 

Once in  Negan' s room,  N ami was summoned. I was pacing in front of them, trying to get my panic breathing in order. They watched me but didn’t comment. I knew I must have look ed  a wreck, muttering and pacing and talking to myself.

“okay, I have thought long and hard about this.” I started.  N egan snickered,  N ami shook her head at his childish laughter. “and I will accept your proposal, only if you give my apartment to Gee and  R ichard, I mean they are having a baby.”  N egan raised an eyebrow. Nami gave an excited squeal jumping to her feet and hugging me. Negan slapped his leg.

“hot diggity dog! That's what I fucking like to hear!” he smiled at me while twirling  Lucille  in his hands. “now, I will set you three up with something, since you made my girl here very happy.” 

“oh, I mean it’s not  necessary that I have a place--” I started  Negan  held up a hand  stopping me.

“ i  love how fucking grateful you are, you know that? I love how you’re willing to sacrifice your wellbeing for others. So ,  take the damn gift Bunny.” I nodded not wanting to make  N egan angry. 13 still ecstatic that he was calling us that cute nickname.

“thank  you , N egan .” I whispered. He held his arms out.

“now come here and give me a hug bunny.” I nodded moving toward him, I took him in my arms, he smelled so good. 13 screamed with joy, I could see her jumping around and popping confetti cannons. As I pulled away from  N egan,  N ami threw herself at me kissing me hard on the mouth, I gave a yelp as I tumbled back landing on  Negan' s lap . Nani kept kissing me, but I pulled away to look up at  N egan he was smiling down at me.

“Shit, now this is a show I like to see.” He grinned. Nami giggled and kissed me again.  Embarrassed  I gently pushed at her shaking my head. Nami pouted but got off me.

“Sorry,” I whispered as I tried to get off of  Negan' s lap. “It’s just happening so fast.” I felt my face heat up, as I slowly stood to my feet. Nami nodded, as well as  N egan.

“We understand darling.” Negan grinned at me. “Now, why don’t you go and have a fun, while I get your living area ready.” I nodded. Negan stood up patting me on the head. “Go write, or draw.” I nodded again. 13 groaning asking  N egan  to touch us again. 

“Thank you ,  sir.” I whispered feeling incredibly shy. Let my head go. I turned to leave, but he stopped me by singing my name. I turned to look at him, he pointed to his cheek, I blushed as I kissed him on the cheek. He winked at me as I pulled away and I ran off. 13 giggling like mad, blubbering that we now had a piece of  N egan.

I burst into the kitchen smiling ear to ear, Gina was sitting on a stool kneading dough. She looked up at me a smile on her face.

“What’s going on honey?” She asked.

“I’m going to make  N egan  muffins!” I told her hopping from one foot to another in excitement. “As a thank you gift.” Gina nodded as she continued to knead the dough in front of her. 

“Go on honey, you know where the ingredients are.” She told me. I nodded. I thought for a second.

“Wait, should I make donuts?” I asked her. Gina gave a excited gasp.

“Girl! I have been craving donuts.”  I smiled at her.

As I finished my journal entry,  S imon and  N egan  entered the kitchen. I looked up giving them a big smile. Negan came up next to me eyeing the plate of donuts next to me.

“Shit, I hope those are for me.” He teased. I nodded  as I put my notebook away.

“Yep! They’re thank you gifts for everything.” He looked at Gina she had been sitting next to me reading her maternity book as she happily ate one. “She also was craving them.” He picked one up handing it to  S imon  who winked at me as he bit in to the Pastry. Negan gave a moan as he bit in to his.

 “Holy fucking shit! This is good.” 

“Oh ,  my gods, it’s been years since I had one of these.” Simon groaned.  “it’s so good!”

“Really?” I  asked,  they nodded. Gina nodded as well.

Once  N egan was done  eating ,  he turned to me, wiping at his mouth with the back of his hand. 

“Okay love,” he said smiling down at me. “Now we got everything ready for you and your friends.” I gave a big smile once again hopping from foot to foot in excitement. I turned to  Gina ;  she was watching us with curious eyes while on her third donut.

“Gee! Guess what!” I said. She gave me a suspicious look.

“What?” She asked.

“I think it’s better if we showed her.” Simon spoke up. Negan nodded.

“Yeah, I wanna see her fucking face.” Negan told the taller man. Gina slowly lowered the donut.

“I swear if you try to get freaky with me ,  I will knock all your asses out.” Gina scolded us. Simon laughed with  N egan and I shook my head.

“ No ,  you silly goose! It’s a surprise!” Gina looked between the three of us.

“Okay, but I’m standing by my word.” She informed us as she stood up. 

“Wait! We should get Richard!” I told them.

Negan,  S imon and I stood behind a blindfolded Gina and Richard. We were in their new studio apartment. It was decorated with what they needed ;  I noticed a baby crib near the bed. 

“Okay,”  N egan said as he moved behind Gina to take her blindfold off. “I just got you what you needed, but you can decorate it how you want.” I watched Gina and Richards expression and  N egan removed their blindfolds. Gina looked around confused as well as Richard. When her eyes landed on the crib her head snapped to look at  N egan, realization hitting her.

“No…”  N egan  nodded.

“Yep, your dear  S teph here,” he moved to wrap an arm around my shoulder. “asked, in exchange for her services, that you two have a small place called home.” Gina and Richard both turned to me.

“Surprise!” I shouted jumping toward them and taking them in a hug. They hugged me back.

“But where…?” Gina started confused.

“Don’t worry about me , N egan got something for me.” I told her. I turned to look at the apartment. “Now enjoy your new home!” Gina teared up. “No! No crying in this new place!” I scolded her. “Now let me show you your new comfy bed!” I pulled her toward the king size bed and gently pulled her down. “Pillow top and everything.” Gina gave a sigh and plopped down on her back.

“ Oh ,  my gods, Richard lay down next to me.” She demanded. Richard pulled himself from the conversation her was having with the two saviors and moved toward his wife with a smile.

“ Yes ,  my lovely wife.” He patted me on my head as he sat on her opposite side. 

“We’ll I’m going to let you guys have a nap.” I said as I kissed Gina on the cheek, but she was already asleep. Richard gave a contended sigh. 

“Thank you , S teph.” Richard said as he reached over to squeeze my hand. “Now, you go and have fun.” I nodded. With that the three of us left the room.  Once in the hallway I excitedly hugged  N egan, then  S imon .

“Thank you! It was perfect!” I informed them. The smiled and led me down the hall, I noticed we stopped a few door s  past  Negan' s  room. 

“Now, it’s your turn.” Negan said as he placed his hands over my eyes. I heard 13  whimper  in arousal, begging me to touch  N egan  back. “Now walk slowly forward.” I slowly did. Negan’s hands were warm on my skin, and smelled like soap. “Ta-da!” He said as he released my face. I gasped staring at the small studio space, there was a king size bed pushed against the wall, a desk, a large bookshelf, the small kitchenette as well. But it was the posters that covered the wall that made me squeal in joy.

“No way! I love that show!” I shouted pointing to the poster above the desk, I moved to the bookshelf to see it was full of books.

“Fantasy, sci-fi and fiction we could find.” Simon answered as I plucked a book from the shelf. “Hank wasn’t too happy that we took them, but what can he do.” I turned to them holding the book up.

“This was my favorite in middle school!” I told them. I flipped thorough the book. “I read this over and over.” I sighed as I clutched it to my chest. I turned to negan. “Thank you.”  I looked around noticing that there were tons of items that screamed me. I looked at the two. “How did you guys know what I liked?”  Negan smiled at me.

“Well,  N ami  told us, and we asked Gina and Richard. Not to mention Ellen from the market told us what you would talk about. She may not look like it but she really enjoyed your enthusiasm for “art shit” I smiled I gently placed the book back on the bookshelf.

 I looked around in awe, it had been years since I had a place to call my own. I moved to the desk to see it was a used old Ikea one I had in high school, it looked familiar. I dragged my fingers along the top and froze when I saw something engraved in the left side. I scraped the paint to find “life is what we make it, so smile  S teph” my heart begun to pound, this was my old desk! I looked at the furniture around my room familiarity hit me. I moved back to the books ripping one from the shelf, I flipped through the book and at the end page my hand writing “8/10 the main character was too annoying in the beginning, but became likable after. Steph m.” I dropped the book and grabbed another, the same. I turned to  N egan after searching through a few.

“A majority of these things are mine!” I told  N egan . “You took our stuff?” I asked. He just stared down at me. I looked at the posters covering the walls, they were mine. “Why?”

“Because darling,” he stared softly. “Whatever you had when we rescued  you,  became mine when you joined the sanctuary.” I looked around.

“So ,  you took our stuff and forced us to work for points to buy back what belonged to us in the first place?” I asked,  N egan took a step toward me, but  S imon  stopped him. 

“You’re sounding pretty fucking ungrateful darling.” Negan growled. I tossed the book on the bookshelf and crossed my arms across my chest. 

“I’m just upset, I had no idea this went on.” I whispered. “I mean Pops told us to leave everything behind! I lost my teddy bear that I had since I was a kid the only  thing ,  I had left to remember my mom!” I argued. I felt tears of anger rush at my lids. “Pops never told me that…” I whispered. “I lost my mom all over again.” Negan sighed. 

“I honestly thought the old man told you and the others.” He said softly. I shook my head. His walkie talkie went off and I could hear someone calling Negan’s name. Negan pulled out his walkie took one look at me before exiting the room. 

“Shit, kid.” I jumped at Simon’s voice. He moved toward me grabbing my arm. “ What is wrong with you? He offers you this deal and you act like this?” I pouted up at him.

“I was just surprised, okay! I didn’t expect my things be  in here!” I told him. “How would you feel if you saw things you thought you were never to see again?” Simon gave a hard sigh.

“I understand, that’s we worked really hard tracking your shit down.” He leaned down to kiss me on the forehead. “Please, just don’t make him mad.” I nodded. He pulled away from me as  N egan  entered the room again.

“Simon, see that this little mouthy bunny here, gets comfortable, I have something to attend to at hilltop.” Simon nodded  N egan  turned to leave.

“Negan!” I moved toward him grabbing his wrist. He turned to look at me. “I’m sorry.” I said softly.  “I  didn’t mean to sound ungrateful, but thank you I love it.” He studied my face, after a few minutes he patted me on the head and left the room. 

“Simon you have the group at  Viskocil  to attend to.” Negan called as he closed the door. I turned to  S imon as he came up behind  me ,  he took me in a hug.

“See! Now he’s happy.” He kissed me on the mouth. “I have to go, but be good.” I nodded. He kissed me one more time before leaving. I turned back to my new studio, excitement filling me up.  _ Now all we have to do is have sex with  _ _ negan _ _! _ __ _ oh and  _ _ N _ _ ami! _  13 cheered, I froze. I had forgot about that…


	9. She Always Wants What I Have!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stephanie loses control of her anger with Kirstin, and has alone time with Simon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...i have no idea what the actual plot is for this story, but i do know this: Steph is in a polygamous relationship, and Nami is the bad guy.  
> trigger warnings: violence with a ladle, oral sex (female receiving)

The next two weeks went by smoothly, I continued to work in the kitchen, Negan and Simon were gone for a run. As the days passed ,  I begun to panic .  it was getting close to the day I was going to… I gulped .  have sex with  N ami and maybe  N egan.  _ What are we going to do? We’re so inexperienced!  _ 13 whined as she threw a fit on the floor.  _  He’s  _ _ gonna _ _  gut us loose!  _  She whimpered. I tried to ignore her as I served the dinner rush.  _ Hello! How are you not panicking? We are only good at writing sex!  _  13 shouted.

“Steph?” I turned to Gina. “What’s wrong ?  you’ve been awfully quiet.” She said softly as she sat on the stool. The dinner rush had finally died down. I turned to her, biting my lip not knowing what to say. 

“Gina,” I started softly, I was so embarrassed , but  I knew I could talk to my friend about it . You see,  my grandfather had literally beat in me that sex was disgusting and something you should be ashamed of.  It was something you give to your husband. Sex was taboo...  “How did you get it in your mind that sex wasn’t taboo?” I asked softly. Gina stared at me her mouth open in a small o. “I mean…” I stammered. “I mean, umm, never mind.” I said quickly turning away from her.

“Oh, baby.” She said softly. “I forgot.” I felt her come up beside me  hugging  me tightly. I turned to her. “It’s okay, you’ll be fine.” She sighed. “I forgot how awful you told me your grandpa was.”

“What if Negan realize s  I’m a waste of time?” I whispered trying not to cry. “And- and- and— that I’m a loser.” Gina shook her head comforting me.

“Steph, you are not a loser. Nami and  N egan picked you because you are adorable, sweet ,  and loving. They saw something in you. Besides, once you get into the fun part, you’ll totally kick that doubt to the curb!” She assured me. “believe me I was so nervous with Richard, I thought he was going to call me gross for being a stripper and all, but he didn’t and those thoughts flew out the window when we got…” I stared up at her. “Hot and heavy.” She finished.

“Really?” She nodded.

“You have to relax,” she rubbed my arms in comfort.  “it’ll come to you naturally.”

“But what if I fart!? Or  queef ?” She  gave me a stunned look before bursting into  laugh ter .

“We all had that happened once, or twice ;  just laugh and make sure not to eat anything that doesn’t agree with you.” She let me go and begun to prepare a few trays. As a group of savior s  made way to the counter. I recognized a few, they had been with  N egan and  S imon  on their run! 

“Hey Steph,”  Arat  said as she came up to the counter. “Negan wants  food  brought up to the meeting room.  He said to make sure you cooked it. ” I nodded. Pops moved next to me patting me on the shoulder.

“Go on kid, I’ll help Gina.” I smiled up at him and hurried to prepare the trays.  Excited to see Simon and Negan.

As I moved down the hall  pushing the food cart  nearing the meeting room, I saw Kirstin on the opposite end moving toward the meeting room as well, in her hands was a tray of food as well. As we both approached the door, she gave me the up and down. She looked at the cart that had the food.

“Huh, so you heard he’s back, and now here you are ,  all cute in your tight ass overalls . ” She snorted. “Like for real find clothes that fit.” I didn’t say anything but knocked on the door. She shoved me out of the way as the door opened, I yelped letting go of the cart  and stumbled . 

“Fucking bitch-“ I started as I straightened up, but stopped as I saw  Regina  staring down at Kirstin.  She gave the blonde a confused look.

“I thought Steph was going to bring the food?” Regina asked.

“I did,” I answered pushing  K irstin aside. “But she pushed me.” I answered. Kirstin glared at me. Regina looked between the two of us and stepped aside as to let me in but  K irstin shoved past me and strolled in the room. Regina gave me a sympathetic look, I just smiled at her and shrugged like say “what can I do?” As I followed Regina, I saw  N egan sitting at the end of a table,  S imon  at his right side, Gavin next to  S imon. An empty chair to Negan's left, and Gary and Dwight sat across from each other either side of Regina and Gavin. I gave them a small wave as I entered. They acknowledged me with a wave back. I quickly moved to serve them.

“I thought I fucking told you I didn’t want to be bothered.” He snapped at kirstin as  she placed the tray in front of him.  I served simon first, he gave me a small wink as I passed him. I blushed at his grin. I served the group, and moved to place cups and fill them up.

“But I thought you would be hungry.” She said smiling up at him. He rolled his eyes  and thanked me as I  poured him some juice.

“Yeah, that’s why I had  Arat  tell Steph to bring me food.” He snapped. “Steph take this and give me your fucking food.” I looked at him in surprised, the others stopping to look at him. I looked at Kirstin, she growled and picked up her tray storming out. I moved to the cart grabbing the extra tray and set it in front of him. I was about to leave when Negan reached out stopping me. In confusion I looked at him. “Send Fat joey in about half an hour to pick up the dishes.” I nodded, he pulled me down so my ear was near his mouth. “Get  real  dolled up for me  tonigh t , I’ll send Nami.” I turned to him face red. In the corner of my eye I noticed the others watching with curious eyes.

“Yes, sir.” I whispered. He smiled at me pushing my hair from my face, his leather clad finger rubbed at my mouth in an intimate manner.  13 screamed with glee, falling on her back and rolling around.

“Good, now run along my bunny.” He smiled as he let me go.  _ He called us bunny! _  13 shouted dancing around.  I moved passed Simon, giving him a pat on the shoulder as I moved by. I stopped, remembering, what I had baked the other day when I thought they would return.

“Oh!” I turned to the group, and moved to the cart. “Before I forget.” I pulled out a apple pie. “I made this for you guys!” I set the pie on the table. Regina, Gavin, Gary,  and  Dwight looked impressed. “It’s a  ‘ I’m glad you’re back safe ’  gift.” I announced as I stepped next to simon.

“Wow that smell s  great!” Regina said looking at the pie.

“Damn, girl you are spoiling us.” Simon said, I jumped as I felt his hand on my rear end.  I looked down at him. He grinned gave me a squeeze before releasing me.

“Shit! I can’t  fucking  wait.” Negan said studying the pie. I smiled at them before excusing myself and leaving the room. Heart pounding. I relayed what  N egan  told me to fat joey as he stood guard, then moved toward the kitchen. I was nervous, I was scared but I was excited.  _ Don’t forget aroused _  13 chirped. Okay I was too.

As I helped clean up the kitchen after lunch, I was lost in my thought thinking about all the scenes I wrote in my fanfiction , worried that what if I didn’t live up to Negan’s expectations, since he had read my stories. Would he expect me to be that good? But I never wrote self-insertion, did I? I made a note to read back some of my  fics  just in case.  I was so lost in my head I didn’t hear Pops and Gina come up behind me.

“Hey,”  P ops patted me on my back. I jumped and turned to look at him. “I said good job girl.” I gave a nervous laugh.

“Thanks  P ops.” He sat on the empty stool next to Gina as she wrote down the menu for the week.

“What’s wrong with you you’re all squirrelly.”  He stated. I waved a hand.

“Oh nothing just lost in my thoughts.” He laughed.

“What’s new?” I took a breath trying to calm myself down. I turned back to Pops studying him. He had been with Gina’s old group before shit had hit the fan and the three of us traveled to my old town to find my family, but sadly crashed into Kirstin, Roy, Bryce. a few months later we met Richard and his small group, but they left and Richard stayed behind for Gina. Pops was a third-generation Italian man, he was about sixty years old, but didn’t look it. He joked around that he was a vampire. He was kind but he had this New Yorker attitude that I thought was cool. “What?”

“Why didn’t you tell me the deal you made with  N egan, so we could live in the sanctuary?” I asked. Gina looked up from her menu and turned to Pops. Pops mouth fell opened and closed as if he was a fish out of water.

“What?” He asked.

“The deal, that they get all our stuff in return to stay here.” Pops looked at Gina. She gave him a desperate look.

“Wait, Gee you knew?” Gina took a breath and turned to me. She nodded.

“I did. I was there.” She sighed. “You were still recovering from what Bryce did and I didn’t want to worry you, we were running out of food and Richard found out that his group had been attacked trying to get to safety, it was the right thing to do.” I pouted.

“But I left my teddy bear!” I whispered. She nodded.

“I know baby. I’m sorry.” She sighed. “We knew this was the only way to survive.” I thought about it, it was true it was getting harder to find food, and our safe house wasn’t the safest. I thought of my teddy bear, but hey I wasn’t the only one that had lost something important to them. Gina had lost her mother necklace, Richard had given up his beloved truck, and  P ops… I turned to him. He had lost his daughter. Everyone had lost something or someone important to them.

“I’m sorry, I’m so stupid.” I whispered. Both laughed.

“Steph you’re not stupid. Just …airy?” Pops tried to save. Gina shook her head with laughter.

“He just means you’re a dreamer, and you love too much.” I smiled at her.

“Thank you  _ Gina. _ ” I said and stuck my tongue at pops. He laughed.

“ So ,  mean!” He jested. As I put the clean utensils away, I heard Gina greet someone, I turned in time to see Simon making his way toward me, my heart pounding, in his hand was plate with a slice of apple pie.

“ H ey you.” He greeted. I smiled up at him. “I saved you a piece.” He held the plate up.

“Hi. Thank you.” He looked over his shoulder to see Gina and  Pops  watching us. He gave them a wave, they smiled and waved back. He turned back to me.

“So wanna go some place quiet?” He asked softly. I nodded.

“Yeah, let me just get my backpack.” I  told him he nodded. 

“Hey  S imon!” Pops called as I moved toward the lockers. “Answer this riddle.” I Couldn’t help but smile, Pops and Simon had become friends soon after we arrived at the sanctuary. He and  S imon always exchanged riddles, Pops and his riddles, he always had one, some were hard other were easy, and some just made me scratch my head.

 As I pulled on my back pack I heard a familiar voice. I took a step back to look out the doorway and saw Kirstin.  _  What the fuck is that slag doing here? _  13 shouted. As I moved closer, I noticed she had wrapped her arms around Simon’s neck.  _  Oh no she didn’t! Rip her hair off!  _  I moved quickly toward them, saw the pie on the counter, and Simon trying to pull out of her grip. Pops was nowhere in sight and Gina watched clutching a ladle her grip was shaking , her eyes narrowed with anger.

“Oh ,  come on , S imon,”  she said loud enough so I could hear. “Remember when you let me get a mustache ride?” I stopped.  _  What the fuck that bitch say?  _  13 shouted summoning her own version of Lucille. I stood there staring at them. “You seemed to enjoy it when I sucked your cock dry. Don’t you miss my tight pussy?”  _  Fucking bitch!  _  13 shouted raising her bat.  _  Hit her! Fuck her up!  _ I agreed for once. __  Pissed beyond the stars I snatched the ladle out of Gina’s hand. I tore toward Kirstin hitting her with the round end.

“Fuck you! You— you— yeasty plume plucked, pox marked, fly bitten, haggard, death token lout!” I shouted between hits. She screamed letting go of Simon and tried to shield herself from my hits. Her screams drawing the attention of other workers. I didn’t care if the other workers watched. how dare she! She always wants what I  have! The  memory of a year ago invaded my unprotected mind.

_ “Gina, I like Simon.” I said softly as I kneaded the bread for the lunch menu. Gina turned to me. _

_ “well, he did save us, and he is really nice. I  _ _ me _ _ an _ _  him and Pops get along fine.” I nodded. _

_ “I think I should give him a thank you gift.” I felt my face burn red. “ _ _ I _ _  mean... he’s nice.” I whispered. Gina laughed and moved to hug me.  _

_ “of course, baby.” I heard a scoff and turned to Kirstin; she was washing the vegetables. _

_ “like he would ever like a fat ass like you.” she stated. Gina moved toward  _ _ Kirstin' _ _ s  _ _ back _ _ ; _ _  fist balled up. I stopped her. _

_ “she’s not worth it.” I whispered. Gina looked down at me and hugged me tightly.  _

_ “hey.” we all turned to see Simon enter the kitchen.  _ _ Gina let me go, gave me a shoulder bump with a wicked grin and moved back to her station.  _ _ “how are you ladies today?” I felt my face burn as he moved close to me. _

_ “Fine, just making lunch.” Gina sang. Simon smiled at her and then looked down at the bread I kneaded. _

_  “oh shit, fresh bread?” I nodded. He smiled reaching up to pat me on the head. “don’t be all shy kid, I'm friendly.” I gave a small laugh. He turned to Gina. “I need the list of items you might need for the menu.” Gina nodded and moved toward the back office. “so how you like it here kid?” I looked up at him. I heard a few saviors making fun of me, the people are okay, Negan still kind of scared me. But I smiled up at him. _

_ “swell actually.” he smiled down at me. _

_ “that’s good!” he leaned down so his arms rested on the metal table. “maybe you and I could grab lunch together and you can tell me all about your experience here.” he said softly. I nodded. _

_ “yeah! That would be nice, I wanted to ask _ _  do you like sweet _ _ \--”  _

_ “Simon!” Kirstin called. “I can’t reach _ _ , _ _  can you help me?” she asked. We both turned to her. She was standing next to the fridges, on top was a metal bowl, I noticed that she had lowered her tank top to show a huge amount of cleavage. He stood up, looked at me, patted me on the head before moving to help her. _

_ Fastforward that same day, I was looking  _ _ for Simon _ _  around the savior trucks. Fat joey and Dwight hung around an open truck end chatting it up. _

_ “what are you doing here?” Dwight asked. I shyly looked at my feet. _

_ “I'm looking for Simon.” I said softly, peeking up to look at him. He looked at the Tupperware in my hands. _

_ “the black jeep past that truck.” he answered I nodded. I moved toward the jeep heart pounding. As I approached, I saw Simon against the hood of the car, Kirstin kissing him. His hands on her hips. I felt tears rush at my eyes. I turned and moved quickly toward where I had come from. I looked down at the Tupperware. _

_ “you find him?”  _ _ Dwight _ _  asked. I gave a sad nod. _

_ “yeah, here.” I held out the cookies, fat joey took them hesitantly. “they’re sugar cookies. I made them for Simon, but he’s busy sucking face!” I burst into tears before running off.  _

_ Later that day Simon came back to the kitchen with fresh vegetables. I was mixing the pork meat for a lasagna. I was so mad at him I called him a man whore to  _ _ G _ _ ina. She was upset with Kirstin, who boasted that S _ _ i _ _ mon liked her and he was a great kisser. Gag. _

_ “hey so what about dinner? _ __ _ me and you chatting it up?” Simon  _ _ asked  _ _ grinning down at me  _ _ as he came up next to me. I looked up at him. _

_ “I’m sorry,  _ _ but I'm schedule for clean up tonight _ _.” Simon gave me a sad look. _

_ “oh, okay.” he said softly. “maybe next time.” _

_ “Kirstin’s free, I mean she won’t shut up about you kissing her.” Gina said as she came up next to me. Simon looked back down at me but didn’t say anything as I ignored him. An angry pout on my lips. I didn’t watch him leave. _

She always wants what I have! I had a crush on Simon, she went to kiss him! I had a crush on Negan, she found out and the next thing I knew she’s his fucking wife! This bitch is going down! My anger built up as she screamed for Simon to help her , that made me angrier so  I lashed out  h itting her  harder  with the ladle.

 In the corner of my eye I saw Roy moving toward us. I cried out when he grabbed me by my hair. I spun  kicking him as hard as I can in the dick. He cried out doubling over in pain, S imon took that opportunity to  grabbed Roy by the neck and slammed him in to the metal prep table. 

“Steph!” I heard Gina shout. I turned in time to dodge Kirstin’s flying fist. I started to swing the ladle hitting what I can. We were in a full out brawl in the kitchen, Simon still had Roy pinned to the table. I threw punches with my free fist and continued to hit her with the ladle.  _  Fuck her up!  _  13 screamed. Kirstin fell to the  ground ;  I fell on top of her just wailing on her. She was screaming for help.

“Woah ,  there my rabid bunny!” I was yanked off of Kristin. I struggled in Negan’s hold shouting profanities and kicking at Kirstin. She rolled to her feet screaming back and trying to hit me. But with a swing of Lucille and the metal clang that rung through the kitchen everything went quiet, it was so quiet that the only thing to be heard was mine and Kirstin’s panting. I glared at the blonde ;  her face covered in blood. A smidge of satisfaction at my handy work tore through me. “What the fuck is going on!?” He roared still hold me up with one arm. I looked around noticing Pops, Gina, Richard (he was trying to hide his smile on Gina’s shoulder), Simon and Roy watched; the other workers had run off not wanting to be the target in Negan's rage.

“She was flirting with Simon and said dirty things to him!” I shouted pointing at Kirstin. “Then Roy came out of nowhere and pulled my hair! So, I kicked him in the dick!” I turned to Roy. “Fucking touch me again you bitch boy and I’ll rip your dick off and make you eat it in a puff since you got no dick to start with.” I snarled at the stun Roy. Then thinking ‘fuck, it I’m in trouble anyway’, I chucked my ladle at him, hitting him in the face. He cried out grabbing at his nose. Richard snorted; Gina moved quickly to cover his mouth, afraid to get  Negan' s  attention.

“Oh shit, look at that Simon, little bunny got the sharp ass teeth.” Negan laughed. I looked at him, then at  S imon . Simon was looking at me, but an unreadable look was on his face. Negan then turned to Kirstin, he gently placed me down on my feet. 

“Simon take Roy to the cells, he’s  gotta  learn not to touch what’s mine.” 13 gasped  _ N _ _ egan called us his!  _ _  Not the time girl.  _ I thought back to her. Simon nodded roughly grabbing Roy by the back of the neck and dragged him out of the kitchen. 

Now that I had come down from my anger, I realized the trouble I was in. I had attacked a wife! I had attacked somebody out of anger! I took a breath, fear running through me. I looked up at  N egan , he was looking down at me.

“Am I in trouble?” I asked softly. He shook his head, tucking a strand of my  ha ir  behind my ear.

“of course not, bunny.” he whispered. He turned to  K irstin, who was glaring at me. “Do you know how fucking embarrassed I was to be fucking informed that one of my wives was all over my fucking right hand man?” He snarled at  K irstin who  flinched at his tone, she  looked at him.

“ N egan \--” she  started he raised a hand cutting her off.

 “Pops, here.” He moved next to pops, patting the older man on his shoulder. “Was the one to get me, he was worried about his friend. He told me that you came into the kitchen flirting and slobbering all over Simon.” He sighed shaking his head. “You have embarrassed me and fucking humiliated me beyond what you can comprehend.” He moved back to stand next to me.  “I  just hate how you embarrass my bunny here.” her eyes narrowed at me. He gently pushed my hair from my face, he took my chin in his fingers, he studied my face. “Shit you didn’t even get a hit on you.” He smiled at me. He let me go.

“I was pissed.” I answered. He nodded, turning back to  K irstin.

“ I have punished you, fucking hoping that you ’ve  learn ed  your fucking lesson.” Negan  sighed as he moved toward her, she took a step back in fear. “Now we’re going to have a little chat.”  He whispered grabbing her roughly by the arm. He turned to me. “No w  bunny why don’t you go and relax. I’ll see you later tonight.” I nodded.  He  gave the others a nod of his head  and left. 

“Holy shit!” Richard shouted as he moved toward me with Gina. “That was flicking awesome! You finally beat her up!” Richard smiled at me. Gina bit her lip in worry. “I’m so proud of you, Stephie !” he said hugging me tightly.

“Baby, what if  N egan punishes you?” She asked. I shook my head.

“He won’t ,  we have an understanding when it comes to that bitch.” I informed her. Pops came to my side rubbing my back.

“Shit girl, I didn’t know you had that in you!” He said, he leaned down. “I’m so proud of you  too .” He whispered. I couldn’t help but smile at them. He wasn’t a fan of  K irstin either , she had once told  Bryce  that Pops was creepy and the asshole tried to hurt pops.

“Thanks for getting negan.” I told him. “ if he didn’t pull me off of her I think I would have killed her.” Gina slid a hand over her hair.

“Baby, why did you lose it?  What if Negan wasn’t so understanding? ” I looked at Gina.

“I don’t know, I thought of her always taking what I ha ve or what I want! Even as kids! a nd I heard what she said. I just got so mad!” I told Gina as we moved from the kitchen to the cafeteria, I noticed those left in the cafeteria watched us and whispered amongst themselves. I ignored them. “I really dislike her.” I whispered. Gina wrapped an arm around my shoulders and we all moved to an empty table. 

“Well,” Richard pulled off his backpack and pulled out a jar of homemade pickles. “I’m happy that you showed her that she can’t fuck with you anymore.” I nodded. He opened the jar and placed it in the middle of us. Gina gave a small squeal and took a pickle from the jar, munching happily on it. Richard took a pickle, as well as pops and I did too. “To our lovable  Stephie !  May she keep kicking ass! Cheers!” We laughed as toasted with our pickles .

I happily munched on my last pickle as I made  way  to my room. I turned  the corner  to see Frankie and Tanya moving toward me, amber trailing behind them. I stopped as they rushed up to me. All speaking at once. 13 was shouting at me to run for it.

“Did you really beat up  K irstin?” Frankie asked. I gave a small nod, normally the wives didn’t talk to me.

“We saw how fucked up her face was.”  Tanya’s whispered excitedly. The three crowed around me. The nickname Negan gave me made sense; I was ready to bolt if they came any closer.

“What happened?”

“What did she do?”

“Did you use your hands or a pan?” They asked all at once. I  looked at them.

“ Uh.. .  well…” I stammered looking around for an escape route. 

“Come on now girls.” I looked up as Simon came up behind us.  _  Look it’s our Simon!  _  13 shouted hear t s for eyes. “She’s had a rough day, she need rest, or she might get sick again.” The three girls pouted at him. “She’ll tell you the story when she’s ready, remember she’s a hell of a writer.” Simon said smiling at them. They nodded, bid me farewell and left. I looked up at Simon and he gently took my shoulder in his hand and led me to my room. 

We walked in silence, once inside. I placed my backpack on my arm chair and removed my shoes. I didn’t say anything as Simon came up behind me, he wrapped his arms around me. “I’m sorry.” He whispered  as I turned to  hug him back ,  burying my face in his chest. 

“She’s such a jerk.” I whispered. I felt him nod. I looked up at him resting my chin on his chest. “You know, I actually had a crush on your first.” His eyes widen at what I said. 

“No shit?” He asked. I nodded.

“Yeah, I made the mistake telling Gina in front of her and when I went to give you a thank you gift for rescuing us, I saw you two kissing by your Jeep.” Simon stared down at me. “I gave the gift to fat joey instead and went to cry.” I sighed. “Then a few weeks later  N egan  was nice to me and complimented my sweater and I got a crush on him.” I found myself reaching up to play with his shirt button again. “I was so mad at you, I called you a man whore.” He burst in to laughter. My face went hot. “Then I heard you got sick and I decided to stop being petty.” He rubbed my back as he chuckled.

“Well if it makes you feel any better, I liked you first too.” my head snapped up to look at him. He nodded. “yeah, remember when I asked you to lunch and dinner?” I thought about it. “I was trying to get to know you. Later Gina told me that you were mad at me because of Kirstin so I backed off.  I was heartbroken, and Kirstin talked me into sleeping with her. Then, I heard  you had a crush on Negan.” I gave a small pout. 

“Kirstin sucks.  She only went after you because I liked you. ”

 “oh,  I know, she told me after. She laughed about it.” 

“she what?” he nodded.

“but if it makes you feel better,  she sucks at sex too.” I looked back at him.  _  Fucking called it that bitch is good for nothing! _  13 shouted jumping up and down.

“Really?” He nodded.

“Yeah, like I did all the work, and she just laid there…really freaky quiet too. Drooled a lot when giving head.” I laughed. “I’m not joking pup. Forgive me?” He kissed me on the head.  I looked up at him, he leaned down kissing me on the mouth.  _  Oh, gods yes!!! _  13 moaned. I gave a soft moan instead of an answer as he kissed me harder. His hand sliding to clutch at my ribcage, he pressed himself against me, his hardness poking my stomach. He pulled away , his eyes hooded with lust, his free hand cupping my jaw.

“Simon,” I whimpered pulling him down to kiss him again, he wrapped his arms around my waist and hoisted me up, I gasped my feet left the ground, I quickly wrapped them around Simon’s waist. He grinned at me and kissed me hard again. I slid my arms around his neck. He gave a growl, as he pulled away to bite my neck, I whimpered. “please?” I whispered. He gave a nod and continued to attack my neck with kisses and bites. I whimpered as he laid us out on my bed. He let me go to cup at my hips, grinding himself on me. I cried out arching against him. He gave a soft growl and kissed at my chest and his hands traveled under my sweater to gently touch my skin.

“Awww shit, “he whispered as  he kissed me again. He finger gently brushing at the edges of my bra. He pulled back to look at me.

“You can touch my boobs if you want.” I whispered face red with embarrassment that I had uttered those words. He gave a grin.

“If you say it’s okay.” He kissed me gently and his hands cupping at my breast. I moaned at the gentle squeeze he gave my breast. He kissed me again. His finger slid under my bra pushing it  up  to expose my breast to him. My face was red, my mind fogged with the pleasure he was giving me with his mouth as he bit and licked at my nipples. I never thought how amazing that would feel, I mean I wrote about it but never experienced such a thing. I couldn’t stop moaning or whimper or gasping at these new sensations he was giving me. His mustached tickled with every kiss and bite. 13 was oddly quiet as if she was watching what was happing between me and Simon. I cried out as he kissed at my clothed hip. A panic was sent through me as I remembered my scars I had there.

“Simon wait!” He pulled back in surprise  as I sat up . I looked down at him.

“I have scars…” I whispered. “From Bryce.” He looked at my hip, I slowly reached down to undo the button and zipper of my pants. I slowly pulled them down to show the jagged scars that ran across the side of my hips. Simon gently touched the puckered skin, he kissed one close to him. He helped me by pulling my pants completely off. 13 squealed when he loving ly  ran his fingers over my hips.

“ Beautiful.” He whispered as he kissed another one, he gently moved my leg over his shoulder. 13 groaned as he trailed kisses down my thighs. I gave a moan as he nuzzled my clothe d  mound, he looked at me as if asking permission. I nodded and  he pulled off my panties. As  he licked at me ,  I gasped falling back on the bed.  _  Oh fuck yes!  _  13 screamed falling over.  _  More please _ _! _  I arched as simon  continued to eat me out .  This was amazing, I have never thought that this simple act was so…I cried out as he sucked at my clit.

“Simon!” I whimpered. He groaned against me never letting up. “Simon!” I cried clutching at the blankets, arching my body harder against his mouth, his hands on my hip kneaded my flesh. I moved against him, Simon groaned shaking his head, his hand tightening on my hips as if to tell me I had to stay still, but I couldn’t ! feels  too good! “Oh...” I cried out as I was hit with my orgasm. 

My hands going to Simon’s head, and I whimpered as I my orgasm died down. Simon pulled away from me, breathing hard. I stared up at the ceiling my hands still on Simon, pleasure fogged my brain.   _  Oh, gods I want to do that again… _  13 whimpered. I groaned as Simon moved to cover my body with his, kissing me gently. I could taste myself on his lips. I gave a small moan as he kissed me again. 

“You look really happy.” He teased. I gave a small laugh.

“That was awesome.” I whispered. It was his turn to laugh. I could feel his hardness poking at me. “Do you want me to…” I trailed off shyly. He grinned at me.

“Do you want to?” I nodded.

“Yeah! I’ve never seen a real life penis before.” I told him. He gave a laugh, but his expression turned serious when he noticed my expression.

“Are you serious?” He asked as he sat up. I nodded sitting up.

“Yeah! I closed my eyes with Bryce.” I told him. “Yours will be my first!” I said smiling at him. I looked at his crotch, the bulge looked pretty big. Simon reached out gently taking my  c hin in his hand and making me look up at him.

“Have you ever had se x before?” He asked. I shook my head. His mouth fell open in a shocked o. “So that was…” my face heated up, and I knew I was blushing.

“My first orgasm… from a person... ” I whispered looking at my bare thighs, suddenly feeling really shy.  “I  mean I've masturbated...but...” I was rambling now.

“ Oh  shit you are so fucking cute.” Simon laughed pulling me in hug. He kissed me hard on the mouth.  He pushed me against the  mattress , I automatically wrapped my legs around his waist. We were making out, now. 

“I’m sorry to interrupt” we both pulled away to see Nami standing at the door, it was closed behind her. “But Negan sent me to get Steph ready.” She announced holding up a makeup bag and a duffel bag.  She was staring at Simon with her lips pressed in a line, her eyes narrowed. He glared back at her.

“we’re busy go away.” he stated. Nami took a breath. I looked between the two they were tense, eyeing each other.

“ Negan  said that he needs to speak with you.” she told Simon . She placed her fist on her hip, still glaring at him. Simon rolled his eyes.   I quickly unwrapped my legs from Simons waist as he got off of me. His hair a mess, he turned his back to Nami as he adjusted himself. He moved to kiss me on the lips and gave Nami a  sneer . With that he was gone. I felt a sadness drifted through me as I watched Simon leave.  __ _ awww _ _ , we didn’t get to see his penis! _  13 cried. I looked at Nami.

“So your punishment is over.” She nodded.

“It was horrible.” She answered as she moved close to me. “I missed you, did you miss  me?”  she asked as she sat on the bed stroking my face. I didn’t know what to say. “ I  was punished.” she said softly. Guilt tore through me.

“ yeah, I missed you .”  I said softly. She gave me a smile.

 “Now come on let’s take a bath.” I nodded  hesitantly. A bath with Nami? She would see me naked! She smiled down at me taking my hand. “you don’t want to take a bath with me?” she asked. 

“I'm shy.” I whispered. She gave my hand a squeeze.

“it’s okay. You have to learn to be more confidant.” I had no choice to follow her.


	10. Touched For the Very First Time...Well, Technically

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter, Steph has her first night with Nami and Negan. We find out how Simon and Steph first met, and she finds out just how fun sex can be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, so like i said before, i have no idea where this fic is heading, but please enjoy some smut.  
> warnings : female receiving oral, male reciving oral, threesome ( but not sex, just oral) unprotected sex and outdoor sex.  
> also i typed this on my phone as i was surrounded by family members so there might be some grammar errors and typos sorry.

I sat between Nami and Negan, my heart pounding against my chest. Even though I had just had an orgasm with Simon, I was so out of my league with two people. We sat on my couch in silence, Nami studying me and Negan as well. My face burning red. 

“You look nice, Bunny.” Negan told me. I looked at him, my face burning red. 

“Thank you, Nami picked out my outfit.” I said shyly as I toyed with the lace hem of my dress. Nami had chosen a red Elegant and feminine lace dress that had a round neckline, half sleeve, sweetheart neckline with illusion lace overlay, she finished it off with a thin black belt. I could feel Negan checking me out, I nervously looked down at my feet Nami finished my outfit with black round toe Casual chunky high-heeled shoes, a leather bow snapped the straps over my ankles. 

“So, I want to ask you a few questions.” Negan said as he leaned back, his arm resting behind my shoulders. I looked at him. “are you a virgin?” He asked. 

“Technically.” I answered truthfully. Negan raised an eyebrow. “My virginity was stolen by Bryce.” He eyebrows lowered and his eyes softened. “It okay! I don’t care, I killed him.” I realized what I said and looked back at my feet. Why would you say that stupid!? 13 shouted. 

“Have you had any sexual encounters that was consensual?” He asked. I thought of Simon. 

“Only someone going down on me.” Nami nodded. I looked at her she smiled at me. Oh yeah! Nami totally thinks were talking about her! 13 gasped. Don’t tell them about Simon, you don’t want to get him in trouble! 

“Do you want to have sex?” Negan asked. I looked up at him. I thought about it. I wanted to, but not yet. 

“Can we take it slow?” I answered softly. “I mean I can do oral if you like, but I feel really inexperienced. I would like to learn about you two first.” Negan reached out gently taking my hand in his. 

“Okay,” I turned to him. “we’ll start slow.” I smiled at him. 

“Thank you.” He nodded. Nami moved close to me, gently pushing my hair behind my ear. I looked at her, she smiled and kissed me gently on the mouth. I froze. “I’m sorry I'm not a good kisser.” I whispered as she pulled away. She laughed. 

"don’t be stupid Steph, it’s okay.” She whispered kissing me again. I gave her a small nod; in the corner of my eye I saw Negan watching us with that sexy grin. Nami kissed me and I groaned in her mouth as her hands groped at my sides and hips. I gave a small cry as I felt her tongue swipe in my mouth. Is that allowed? I thought 13 shrugged. I pulled away confused, she gave a small smile. I felt Negan's leather clad hand take my chin, I turned to him. YES! 13 screamed as Negan kissed me on the mouth. Fuck yes! Oh, his lips are so soft, he tastes amazing! don’t stop kissing him! I could feel Nami kissing me gently on the back of my neck and shoulders. 

I whimpered in Negan's mouth his hand on my neck, his thumb gently rubbing circles in my flesh. Nami’s hand traveled down my thighs, I gave a startled jump, pulling from Negan as Nami's fingers brushed my mound. She smiled at me as I turned to her. 

“Bed.” Nami stated as she moved to her feet, pulling me and Negan up with her, she kissed me on the mouth, then moved to kiss Negan. She pulled us toward the bed. I followed her, Negan still holding onto me. This is a fanfiction dream come true! 13 shouted jumping foot from foot in excitement. 

Nami sat on the bed, pulling me on top of her, Negan sat down next to us as Nami made out with me. Her fingers painfully digging in my back. I felt Negan's hand gently rubbing at the back of my thighs. I gave a yelp as Nami rolled me over my dress hiking up, her hands on my hips. Her hands freezing when she felt my scars. Nami stopped kissing me and look down at my exposed hips, I sat up quickly pulling my dress down, suddenly embarrassed. Negan and Nami stared at me, they both exchanged a look. 

“Sorry, I should have told you about the scars.” I whispered. Nami shook her head. 

“it’s fine, Steph we all have scars.” Negan reached out taking the hem of my dress to lift it up. I let him. He reached out with his other hand gently stroking the scars. He leaned down to kiss them. 13 gave a moan and fell over. He sat back up to kissed me on the mouth. 

“Do you still want to do this bunny?” He asked. I nodded quickly; I was not going to loss this opportunity with Negan. 

“Yes,” I whispered. “I want to do this.” He gave me a grin and kissed me again. Nami pulled up my dress over my thighs. 

“Look Negan, her panties are so cute.” Nami caught Negan's attention. He looked down and smiled at my pink lacy thong. 

“Oh, shit that is hot.” He whispered his hand gently stroking the pink bow on my underwear. I felt my face flush, as his hand moved to cup my mound, I gave a small whimper as his finger slid over my sensitive clit. 

“Negan.” I whimpered. Nami kissed me on the mouth, her kisses traveling to my neck. “Nami?” I whispered as she pushed me on my back. Her hands cupping my breast. 

“I can’t wait to see these.” Nami whispered. “I always had a thing for big breast.” She kissed at my chest, her hand groping me. Negan’s fingers gently teasing me, pleasure fogged my brain. I found myself moaning and whimpering their names. Both kissing my neck. She pulled away and reached up to undo her zipper on her dress, I watched as she pulled off her dress, she wasn’t wearing a bra, and she wore black lacy panties, it was just like mine. Nami’s body had faint stretch marks, her breast were small, her slender hips and legs were smooth looking. She tossed her dress aside and kissed me on the mouth as I sat up. Negan pulled his hand away from my mound, I gave a whine at the loss of contact. As I turned to him, He kissed me on the mouth before moving his fingers to my mouth. 

“Be a good girl and suck for me.” I shyly opened my mouth and let him stick his fingers in, I gently sucked. Am I doing this right? Is he okay with this? “Good girl.” He growled leaning down to kiss me gently on the cheek. I could feel Nami undoing my zipper on my dress. Negan pulled his fingers from my mouth. Nami kissed me on the neck before helping me out of my dress, I felt a little self-conscious since I wasn’t a flawless as Nami. Negan kissed my bare skin. Nami kissed me again. I was glad they were taking things slow, but I was embarrassed that they could see all my flaws. 

“Don’t be shy.” Negan whispered peppering my shoulder and neck in kisses. I nodded. Nami kissed me again, she took my hand slowly leading it to her pussy. 

“I want you touch me Steph.” She whispered. I was surprised how hot and wet she was. “See how wet you make me.” She whispered and kissed me on the neck. I was in awe, as I touched her, I never touched another pussy before. She gave a moan, as I worked her. "don’t you want to taste me?” I looked at her. Negan moaned in my skin. 

“Shit bunny,” he whispered pulling away from me. “the image of you doing that is just making rock hard.” He kissed me. I looked at Negan, then back at Nami. 

“please? Don't you want to make me feel good?” She moved on her back, spreading her legs. I looked at Negan, he grinned at me, kissing me gently. 

“It’s okay.” he whispered. I gave a nod and crawled between her legs. She pulled off her underwear and tossed them aside. “take your time.” Negan said softly. I nodded. I moved to my knees. I gently moved my hand to spread her open and stared in awe, I have never seen another pussy before. Her clit was glistening with her wetness. 

I bit my lip wondering what I should do, my thoughts went back to Simon, maybe I should just copy what he did…but I didn’t see him, I felt it. I leaned down giving her clit a lick, she moaned. Her taste was completely different from what I tasted on Simon's lips. So, I started to lick her like I thought Simon did to me. Nami’s moans grew loud, her hands clutched at my head, her nails raking my skin, I gave a whimper of pain. I felt Negan's hands on my hips. 

“On your knees bunny.” He whispered. I lifted my butt in the air, as Negan gently kneaded at my hips. I tried to concentrate on the pleasure I was giving Nami, but Negan’s wondering fingers made me moan. He hissed as he slid a finger inside me. “shit you are clenching me, Baby.” I pulled away from Nami whimpering. He kissed the swell of my hip, as he worked me. 

Nami reached out to push my head back down. I moaned into her as I felt Negan lick at me. oh shit! 13 shouted clutching at her chest. Negan worked me with his finger and mouth. 13 screaming his name. Nami cried out arching against my mouth and I came from the sheer thought of Negan tasting me. 

I pulled away from Nami, arching and crying out. As I slumped against the bed, I felt Negan slip his fingers out from me; I whimpered the empty feeling it gave me. Nami sat up kissing me and praising me how I did a good job. 

I slowly sat up, and saw Negan watching us. Nami was kissing me gently, on my neck but I was looking at the bulged in Negan's pants. He grinned at me as I looked at him. 

“curious?” he asked I nodded. 

“I never sucked one before.” I whispered. Negan gave a groan and moved to kiss me on the mouth. Nami took my hand leading me off the bed, to sit in front of Negan, his legs either side of me, she sat next to me. She led my hands to Negan's lap. 

“go ahead and touch him.” Nami told me. “I’ll teach you.” I bit at my lip, as I slowly undid his pants. My face red and burning as he watched me. I gave a small gasp as it sprang free from its hold. 

“wow,” I said softly, reaching out to take it in my hand. “it’s big.” I heard Negan give a hiss. I looked up at him, and pulled my hands off of him afraid I had hurt him. “I’m sorry.” He shook his head taking my hands and leading it back to his... we’re touching his cock! We are touching his cock! We have dreamed of this! 13 screamed. I hesitantly leaned forward to give it a kiss on its head, he gave a small sound of pleasure. 

“lick from here to here, baby.” Nami whispered as she gently dragged her index finger along the underside of his cock. I did as I was told, Negan let out a moan. “okay take the tip and suck it.” I looked at her. 

“will it fit in my mouth?” she laughed nodded. 

“yes, it will.” I ohh’d and moved to do as I was told. As I followed Nami’s instructions, Negan made the sexiest sounds. don’t stop! He sounds so sexy! 13 shouted at me. As I pulled away from his cock, a gag on the back of my throat. 

“sorry,” I said quickly as he looked down at me. “I keep gagging.” I pouted. Negan laughed and leaned down kissing me gently on the mouth. 

“it’s okay bunny, take your time I'm not fucking complaining.” he whispered. Nami was kissing my shoulders as she instructed me. 

“now, suck and pump with your hands.” I nodded. As I gave Negan all I had, he was groaning and hissing in pleasure, my heart fluttered to the thought that I was making him feel good! Me! 

“oh, fuck Bunny.” he groaned, he arched slightly and something hit the back of my throat. I quickly swallowed what I can. I pulled away coughing, splatters of cum landed on my breast. 

“sorry, I tried.” I said between coughs. Nami patted me on my back. 

“it’s okay, I'm surprised you swallowed.” she told me. 

“Well, I didn’t want to be rude...” I said softly. Negan and Nami burst in to laughter. 

“oh, shit you are fucking adorable.” Negan whispered, kissing me on the mouth. I think we should try that again. 13 spoke up quickly. we might not be doing it right! I agreed with her. 

“Can I do it again?” I asked. Negan stared down at me. “I want practice.” he kissed me again. Nami pouted. 

“but It’s my turn.” I looked at her. “don’t you like making me feel good?” I looked up at Negan. 

“it’s okay, bunny. we have all night.” he whispered kissing me softly on the mouth, in the corner of my eye I saw Nami roll her eyes. 

 

I woke up to Nami cuddling me and the bed dipping as Negan got up. I gave a small groan, stretching. I rolled over to see Negan pulling on his pants, I looked over the window to see the sky still dark. 

“what's going on?” I asked softly as I sat up. Nami groaning and rolling away from me. Negan pulled on his shirt and moved toward me. He kissed me on the head. 

“I have work to do,” he said softly as he pushed my hair from my face. “I’ll see you later.” I nodded. He kissed me on the cheek. “go back to sleep.” I nodded and plopped back down. 

“be safe, Negan.” I called after him as he left my room. 

 

I woke up past eleven, Nami was gone, but she left a note on the side table. 

“Went back to the parlor on Negan's request, see you later, love Nami.” I read out loud. I looked around and squealed as I rolled over to smell the pillow Negan had been using. It smelled faintly of his cologne, and hair product. I clutched it to my chest. With a quick decision I moved to get dressed, Gina might need my help in the kitchen. 

As I came into the cafeteria, I saw Gina talking to Pops behind the food counter, he had a serious look on his face, his lips pulled down in a scowl and his eyebrows furrowed. 

“hey,” I looked up as Dwight came up next to me. “so, I heard about Kirstin.” I looked at him confused. 

“yeah, I wasn’t myself...” I answered embarrassed by what happened. 

“Steph, be careful she is on a warpath.” I smiled up at him, he was trying to warn me! How sweet. 

“thank you for the warning Dwight.” I patted him on his arm. “look if you ever crave a dessert tell me, I'll make it for you.” he nodded with a smile, with that he left. 

As I moved toward my friends, I felt something sharp hit me in the back. I cried out, stumbling to my knees. A few saviors that had been nearby caught me asking me if I was okay. I nodded and turned to see Kirstin, and to my surprised she was dressed in normal clothes, a tee and baggy pants. The saviors let me go and I turned to Kirstin, the bruises on her face still dark and the bandage across her nose dirty. 

“you didn't learn your lesson?” I asked reaching behind me. She snorted. 

“you caught me off guard, fatty. I'm ready now--” I hit her with a tray across her face, she gasped in pain stumbling back. 

“guess you weren’t ready bitch.” I snarled chucking the tray at her. She whimpered and looked at me. I moved toward her, but a hand caught my wrist, I looked up to see it was Sherry. She shook her head at me. 

“back off Kirstin.” sherry said. I saw that Arat and Laura were the wives’ escorts today, they watched us wordlessly. “you can’t take your anger out on Steph, you got yourself in trouble.” sherry told her moving me behind her, as if she was afraid, I was going to attack Kirstin again. Tanya and Frankie stepping up next to Sherry. Amber gently pulled me toward her. I noticed Nami wasn’t with the wives. 

“Negan warned you again and again, but you didn’t listen.” Tanya said as she crossed her arms across her chest. 

“It’s your fault you're no longer a wife.” Frankie said. I looked at them, my eyes going wide and mouth opening in shock. no fucking way! He kicked her to the curb? 13 shouted. 

“why does he even like her!?” Kirstin shouted. “she fat! She's weird! And she—she--” she screamed stomping her foot. 

“fucking leave her alone!” Nami came out of nowhere grabbing Kirstin by the hair. As they fought, I moved to stop them but Arat and Laura was already pulling them apart. Nami screamed at Kirstin kicking at her as Arat swung her around. 

Laura moved dragging a sobbing Kirstin out of the cafeteria. Nami calmed down once Kirstin was out of sight. She pulled from Arat’s grip. She grabbed my hands pulling me toward the kitchen. 

“are you okay baby?” I nodded, as she pushed my hair from my face. “see? What I do for you?” I gave a nod. She smiled at me. “it’s okay, Negan will deal with her.” I nodded again. She kissed me on the cheek. I looked at the other wives, as they crowded around me. 

“thank you.” I told them they nodded. 

“my question is, will you be okay?” sherry asked. I laughed. 

“I’m not letting her bully me anymore! I'm done with that shit.” they laughed. 

“sherry, did you not see her clonk Kirstin with the tray?” Frankie asked. Arat cleared her throat telling the wives that it was time to go. We all said our good byes. Nami gave me a quick kiss before running off with the other wives. 

“Steph,” I looked up noticing Sherry still standing next to me. “you should be careful with Nami.” I gave her a tilt of my head. “just be safe.” she whispered. I nodded again, with that she left with the group. As soon as they were out of sight Gina came at my side. 

“Steph!” Gina said as she hugged me. “Pops told me that Kirstin wasn’t a wife, and I was too late to find you.” I looked up at her. 

“did you see me hit her with the tray?” I asked. She gave a laugh and nodded. 

“I did.” I hugged her tightly. 

“I can take care of myself!” I told her. “you don’t have to worry.” 

“but baby,” Gina took my hands in hers. “we all know that Kirstin isn’t right in the head.” I sighed and nodded. 

“I’ll be fine.” I squeezed her hands. “I promise.” she gave me a small smile, but the way her lip trembled told me she was worried about me. 

“do you need my help in the kitchen?” I asked, she shook her head. 

“we have enough help; you go and draw or write.” I nodded. I gave her a quick hug, before running off. we should be careful. 13 spoke up her voice filled with worry. She was never the type to back down. 

 

About three days later, I sat in the field as before painting. I had bribed Fat joey with pie tarts this time. I painted the foliage with the tips that Simon had given me. I growled as it still looked a mess. I pouted at the painting, maybe if I shade, I thought moving my brush to the black paint. 

“I told you no shading with black!” I jumped at Simon's voice. I looked up as he sat next to me. He had a small basket in his lap. “try mixing a purple.” he told me as he pulled out a sandwich wrapped in a clean napkin. hello Simon! 13 shouted. ugh look at him he’s so hot! And he’s ours too! 

“this is hard.” I pouted. He laughed. 

“well, you have to practice to get better.” he informed me as he kissed me on the cheek. “here.” he handed me half of his sandwich. I thanked him and took a bit not realizing how hungry I was. Once I was finished with my half of the sandwich I continued to paint as Simon ate his lunch. 

“how’d you get so good?” I asked. He laughed. 

“Practice Honey.” he answered. I pouted again. “so, how is it with Negan and Nami?” he asked. I blushed. The past three night, Negan and Nami came to my room, he was fine with oral since I was still too shy to have sex. The memory of Negan's tongue made me blush. I quickly covered my face with my palms shaking my head. Simon laughed. “what is it? Negan too greedy?” I shook my head to look at him. 

“no,” I looked down at the painting. “It’s just I haven’t had sex with Negan, and Nami showed me what a strap on was...” my face burned. Simon burst in to another fit of laughter. 

“you’re so red!” I playfully hit him whining at him. 

“I didn’t even know what a strap on was! It looks huge! I'm scared it’s going to hurt.” I sighed. “I’m pathetic.” he shook his head and resting it on my shoulder. 

“no, just really sheltered. I mean your grandpa was an asshole, I think he might have had a few choice words about sex.” I looked down at the painting. Simon raised him head to look me. I nodded sadly. 

“he beat it in us that sex was taboo.” Simon gave a soft curse and hugged me. 

“I’m sorry, honey.” I smiled up at him. 

“It’s okay, I'm slowly trying to forget his voice.” he smiled down at me and kissed me gently. “oh! Good news! I hit Kirstin with a tray!” he laughed nodded. 

“yeah! I heard about your and Kirstin's heated exchange in the cafeteria.” he gave a chuckle pulled me in to his arms. I nodded. “Arat told me.” I smiled up at him. 

“see! I can take care of myself!” he squeezed me. 

“I know you can. I'm proud of you.” his praised bloomed happiness in my heart. I gave an excited smile. he’s proud of us! Go girl! 13 shouted. “besides Kristin is mad she’s not a wife anymore.” I thought of Negan and our exchange in the morning. 

“is that why Negan's mad at me?” I asked softly. “I made him lose a wife?” I asked softly. Simon looked down at me confused. “this morning, I tried to please him with my mouth, but he seemed annoyed and pushed me away telling Nami to finish him off.” I felt tears of rejection bloom. I wiped at my eyes. 

“no, he isn’t upset about that.” Simon rubbed my arm in comfort. “we got some bad news at the outpost.” Simon's smile fell, and a scowl appeared on his lips, his eyes forming the sparks of anger. 

“what happened?” I asked softly. He looked down at me, and kissed me softly on the lips. 

“nothing that you need to worry your pretty head about.” he whispered. I nodded. “did Negan say anything?” he asked softly. I shook my head. 

“he left when Nami was done.” I stared out in the vast field, the woods nearby dark and ominous looking. “I don’t think I could ever please him, Simon.” Simon turned to look down at me. “I'm too inexperienced.” I told him. Simon nodded. 

“true, but like painting with a little practice you can get experience.” I looked up at him. He kissed me on the head. “hey remember when we met?” he asked. I nodded. “remember you were so shy, and you didn’t talk to any men? But after a while you started talking to the guys and being friendly?” I nodded. “like that, just have your experience with Negan, and he’ll give you pointers.” I stared up at Simon, he seemed lost in his thoughts. I couldn’t help but study his handsome face. The first time I had met him...that was almost two years ago. The memory came 

“Steph, are you sure you can walk?” Gina asked. I nodded 

“I’m fine, the cuts are healing nicely.” I answered as we moved to the house across the street. It was our turn to scavenge. 

“I’m just worried baby.” I turned to her smiling. 

“I’m fine, but the wound here hurts.” I answered as I moved my hand to my clavicle. Gina moved to hug me. I hugged her back tears forming. I had yet to cry about what happened to me. 

“hey guys! I found something.” Richard called from the front door of the house. We pulled away from each other to move in the house. “I found a garden!” Richard said excitedly as he led us through the house. “we can move the plants back at home base!” Richard babbled as he moved through the sliding doors. 

“yes, fresh veggies.” Gina groaned. “I can’t wait.” I moved to look at the strawberries. 

“look Gee!” I pointed the fruit. “it matches my sweater!” I laughed. Gina smiled at me, but her smile fell as she looked over my shoulder. I turned in time to see four men come out of the wood, they had big heavy looking guns. 

“Look at this, we hit the jackpot boys.” I backed up into Gina, Richard stood up, as he moved toward us; one of the men raised his gun pointing it to our friend. 

“nah, nah, nah boy. You, beaner, stay where you’re at.” Gina reached out taking my hand. The three other guys smiled at each other; I couldn’t help but notice the lustful looks they were giving Gina. 

“I call dibs on the colored girl.” one of the men laughed. I whimpered as I looked at Gina, she had a hard look on her face. 

“I want the fat one, she might squeal like a pig.” they all laughed. I moved in front of Gina. 

“you racist Lout!” I shouted. Gina reached out pulling me back shushing me. All men eyes went narrow their fingers tightening on their guns. the leader moved toward me, as gina stepped up he pointed his gun at her, she froze terror on her face. I didn’t make a sound as he grabbed my hair. I wouldn’t give him that pleasure. 

“the fuck you call me girl?” he snarled. I glared up at him. 

“leave her alone!” Richard started. A gun shot rang out, Gina screamed, something hot spattered against my face. the leader let go of my hair. I opened my eyes and screamed as I saw a bullet hole in his head, more gun shots rang out and the other three fell down dead. Richard grabbed us pulling us toward the exit of the backyard. 

“run!” he shouted. 

“I wouldn’t.” I looked over as a larger group of men stepped out from the woods. My heart pounded. The leader was a tall man with an impressive mustache. Gina pulled me close to her. “it’s okay,” the man raised his hands in a surrendering manner. “we’re the good guys.” he said moving close to us. I looked at Gina. “we got rid of the bad guys for you.” I noticed their guns. 

“I’ll distract him, run to the others.” I whispered. She looked down at me shaking her head. 

“go!” I looked back at the man. “warn the others.” I ripped my hands from her grip and ran toward the man. 

“Surprise!” I shouted as I jumped at him, to my complete surprised he caught me and hoisted me up. I grabbed his shoulders in surprise. “oh, holy crow, you can carry me?” I asked incredulously. He smiled at me, nodding. 

“I can.” I heard Gina cry out, I turned to see more men step out from the side door surrounding us. “we’re not going to hurt you.” the man called to Gina and Richard.” I looked over my shoulder to look at Gina and Richard. 

“what do you want?” Gina asked. The man set me down on my feet, he patted my head before moving toward Gina, I moved pass him to stop in front of Gina protectively. I stared up at him, with an angry pout. He gave me an impressed look. 

“We just want to help you,” he answered. He crouched down until he was eye level with me. “I'm Simon, and you are?” he asked softly. 

“Stephanie.” 

“that’s a lovely name. How about this,” he started reaching for the gun at his hip. I flinched as he brought it up. “how about you hold this, take me to your group and if I step out of line you can shoot me.” I looked at the gun he was holding out to me. I turned to Gina, she nodded. I gently held out my hands, he placed the gun in my hands, but as soon as I grabbed it went off. Simon's men all moved to point their guns at us. Gina moved quickly taking the gun from my hand. 

“stand down it was an accident.” Simon called. 

“I'll hold it baby.” I nodded heart pounding. 

“good Idea.” I told her. I looked up at Simon. “now Mr. Simon who are you?” 

“Negan.” 

 

I pulled myself from the memory and gave a small laugh. Simon turned to look down at me in question. I looked at him. 

“just remembering how we met.” I answered smiling. He smiled back kissing me on my forehead. “look at us now.” he raised an eyebrow in question. “from you saving me, to friends and now this.” I said softly as I rested my head on his shoulder. 

“best kind of thing.” he whispered. He studied me for a second before kissing me on the mouth. I found myself kissing him harder. He growled in my mouth pulling me closer to him. I couldn’t help but whimper as his hands moved to my hips, he pushed me back, so I was against the ground, him between my legs. I gave a small moan as he kissed my neck, his hands rubbing my thighs and hips under my flowy skirt. He sat back on his heels looking down at me as if he was asking permission to go on. 

“Steph?” he asked hesitantly. I shyly nodded. 

“Simon. It's okay, I want this.” I whispered. I reached up undoing my zipper on my sweater, face burning red. Simon took a breath as he saw I only had a bra underneath. “I forgot to do laundry sorry.” he laughed kissing me. 

“are you sure?” he asked as he pulled away. hands still rubbing at my thighs I nodded. 

“please.” he moved to cover my body with his. His mouth greedily kissing at my body, his hands grabbing at my breast. His mouth sucking and biting where ever he could reach. I reached up helping him out of his shirt. He growled as I kissed him on the neck, and chest. His hands were everywhere. I gave an arched gasp as his fingers rubbed at my clit. “Simon!” I whimpered. He kissed me hard on the mouth, he pulled away from me to undo his pants, pulling himself out. I stared at his penis in awe. It was much thicker than Negan’s. Oh shit... 13 whispered. is it going to fit? she asked. I swallowed hard, and looked up at him. 

His eyes were full of lust as he reached down hooking my panties with his fingers and pulled them off me, he came back kissing me with need, and the desire he felt seeping into me burning me with … I gave a gasp as he entered me in a fluid motion. I arched against him, hissing in pleasure and pain. He kissed my forehead lovingly. He was stretching me in such a delicious manner. 

“Simon,” I whimpered. “holy crow...” 

“Does it hurt? I can pull out” he asked pulling from me. I shook my head, reaching out clutching at his hips. I moved my hips against him, wanting to feel the pleasure I had written about so many times. 

“more,” I gasped as he pulled out and thrusted. “oh, crow...” I whimpered. He gave a laugh kissing me on the mouth. His movements fogged my brain with pleasure, I could hear how loud I was being but I didn’t care, I felt him mouth on my neck and chest. His whispers of encouragements, I felt something building. “Simon!” I cried out as my orgasm hit. Simon cursed, his thrust never stopping, and with a gasp I felt another orgasm hit. “Simon!” I cried out again moving feverishly against him. I screamed as another orgasm hit me. oh fuck! 13 shouted. is that possible? 

“oh fuck.” Simon groaned as he came. His thrust slowing down, my legs were shaking, Simon buried his face in my hair breathing hard. I whimpered as he slowly pulled out of me with a groan. I stared up at the cloudless sky, the adrenaline of my orgasm coming down, Simon peppered my face in kisses. “Did I hurt you?” he asked softly. I shook my head. 

“I’m sorry I screamed.” I whispered. He laughed as he rolled over. 

“it’s natural.” 

“what if the others come looking for the sound?” Simon looked at me. 

“yeah, we should go.” he said as he sat up fixing his pants. I sat up zipping up my sweater and running my hands through my hair making sure I didn’t have any sticks or debris. I smiled at Simon as he pulled me to my feet kissing me on the mouth. I looked around the area. “what's wrong?” Simon asked as he put my painting supplies in my painting bag. 

“I can’t find my underwear.” I said softly. He laughed and patted his pocket. 

“those are mine, now.” he answered helping me in my bag. 

“why?” I asked face red. 

“just in case I have to leave, I have something to remember you by.” I felt my face burn red. 

“oh,” he grabbed my hand pulling me toward him, he kissed me on the mouth. “okay.” 

“come on.” 

As we made it to the gate, fat joey and Joey were standing about, joey was eating a pie tart I had bribed fat joey with. They stood up straight when they saw Simon. 

“hey boss,” joey said. Simon nodded. 

“We heard screaming is everything okay?” joey asked. Simon smiled at them, my face red. 

“oh yeah I just scared the crap out of her.” he lied. I noticed that the two men looked down at our interlaced fingers, but didn’t say anything. “now see yah later.” he pulled me toward the building. I quietly followed behind. 

“they totally screwed.” I heard joey whisper. My face burned, but I didn’t care. 

 

Once inside my room, I tossed my backpack on my desk and pulled off my shoes. 

“so...” Simon said softly. I turned to him as he crossed the room, and pulled me in his arms. “would you like some more practice?” he asked smiling down at me. I nodded. 

“yes please.” he kissed me hard on the mouth, and I gave into his roaming hands. “do you know any different positions?” I asked as he pulled away. He grinned wickedly down at me. “for research reasons...” I finished lamely. He laughed, taking my face in his hands. 

“Oh, I do.” he kissed me again. 

 

I rolled over in the bed as I felt Simon get up from his spot. I watched as he gathered his clothes. He was naked, and I admired his body. I continued to watch as he pulled on his pants. 

“what’s wrong?” I asked softly. Simon turned to me, a smile on his lips. 

“I have to get things ready for tomorrow.” he pulled on his shirt. “big plans I have for the bad guys.” I sat up bringing my legs close and resting my chin on my knees. 

“bad guys?” I asked. He sat down next to me as he buttoned up his shirt, he nodded. 

“yeah,” he kissed me on the head. “but don’t worry about that.” he kissed me one more time. “get some sleep.” I nodded. He pulled on his boots. 

“be safe.” I called after him as he moved toward the door. He grinned at me. 

“always.” then he was gone. I sighed and plopped back on the bed smiling to myself. 13 squealing and rolling around. we had sex with Simon! We did so many dirty things! I blushed at the memory of me and Simon. I squealed as I rolled over in my bed bringing the pillow he used to my nose. My hips were sore, and I felt...well used. I grinned as I rolled off my bed to my feet moving toward my bathroom, I need a good hot shower.


	11. It's Her Dream Come True!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steph finds out Kirstin gets hers. She had an amazing moment with Negan and Simon, and Nami shows her true colors.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, i'm not done with story! i will slowly update it. but my muse has been obsessed with Marvel right now. sorry!

As I exited my bathroom in my robe, and towel drying my hair I froze. Negan sat on my bed; Lucille rested against the side table. He was hunched over, his eyes closed, his face drawn in sadness, his lips pulled down in a tired frown.  _  oh shit! Negan!  _  13 shouted.  _  is he going to get mad about Simon?  _

“hi.” I said softly as I moved toward him. I looked around wondering where Nami was. “are you okay?” I asked softly as I sat next to him. He slowly looked at me, his eyes opening, a small grin forming on his mouth.

“hey bunny,” he said softly. “I’m fine.” I could smell the alcohol on his breath. He reached out to caress my cheek.

“where’s Nami?” I asked softly. He sighed.

“I’m sorry, but she is punished. I heard about the  fucking  fight she had with Kirstin. So, I decided a few  fucking  days from you was the best punishment.” I nodded in understanding.  _  holy shit! It's just you and Negan tonight!  _  13 let out an excited scream. “I’m sorry about this morning, bunny.” I studied his face; he drew his lower lip between his teeth as he studied me back. “ I didn’t  mean to hurt your feelings.” he leaned down to kiss me. 

“It’s okay, Simon told me that you were upset with something else.” I answered. Then bit my lip worried I might have got Simon in trouble, what if he couldn’t tell me those things.

“he did?” I nodded. “what he say?”

“something bad happened at an outpost.” I answered. He gave a small nod, letting my face go. The sad look was back on his face. “Do you want a drink? I can give you a back rub too, you seem tense.” I saw the corner of his mouth curved in a smile.

“that  sounds  good.” he answered. I smiled and moved toward my kitchenette.  I moved to the cabinet that Nami had put some bottles of liquor for Negan. I heard the rustling of clothes and turned to  see Negan  removing his jacket. I quickly turned back to the task at hand. I had no idea the difference of the bottles so I grabbed one that was brown and poured some in the glass.

“i don’t know what is what but here you go!” I said cheerfully as I moved back toward him. He had sat back on the bed as I handed him the glass. He took it from me with a thanks and took a sip.

“scotch?” I shrugged.

“it was what Nami put in the cabinet.” I answered. He didn’t say anything but took a big gulp. I moved to my bathroom to get the lotion as I returned back to the room, I saw Negan lain out on his stomach , shirt off,  on my bed. My heart pounded as I moved toward him. 13 screaming in excitement and rolling around. It's just a massage. I told myself.  _  ugh yeah in your robe!  _  13 retorted. “ready?” I asked Negan, he nodded.

“Be gentle please.” I nodded.

“okay, I'm not as good a Frankie, but I'll try.” I told him. He laughed nodding. I put the lotion on my hands and rubbed them together to get it warmed up.  _  don’t mess this up!  _ 13 shouted I ignored her, as I slowly placed my hands on his back, moving a firm movement. He gave a soft groan. As I worked on his back in silence. 

“I know about Simon.” I froze. Negan turned his head so he was looking at me.  _  run! _  13 shouted. I stared down at him, heart pounding. 

“are you going to iron my face?” I asked I could feel my lip trembling. He slowly turned on his back, he placed a hand behind his head. He studied me, then shook his head.

“of course not, bunny, what the fuck?” he answered. “I’ve actually known about him for a while.” I sat down on my knees next to him. “it was the way he looked at you, but I found out when you attacked Kirstin. He admitted to having feelings for you when I questioned him.”

“is he in trouble?” I asked softly. Negan shook his head.

“no, I think you  two  should stay together.” I felt my heart flutter at that statement.

“really?” he nodded. “yeah, the fucker seems more focused now.” he laughed. “and you need somebody when Nami and I aren’t around.”

“you’re okay with it?” Negan rubbed at his beard.

“sure, but he can’t fuck or touch Nami.” I nodded excitedly. “or else.”

“I don’t think they like each other.” I whispered. Negan laughed as he sat up downing the rest of his drink. “thank you, Negan, you’re so cool!” I hugged him as he placed the cup down. He hugged me back, kissing me on the head. With a quick movement he rolled me over on the opposite side of the bed. 

“alright bunny, sleepy time.” he yawned as he pulled the blankets over us. “I’m fucking exhausted.” I nodded. He pulled me close and kissed me on the head, I cuddled deeper in his arms, and closed my eyes.  _  awwww, I wanted to have sex with Negan!  _  13 whimpered. But I drifted off to sleep dreaming of Negan and Simon telling me to be careful.

I didn’t see Negan or Simon for two days, but  Nami  spent the night with me teaching me things. She was very dominant; it was different from Simon. Nami wouldn’t let me draw or write unless she was bored, then she would ask me to read my stories to her. 13 was vocal about not liking Nami, she seemed...different when we were alone. 

I honestly missed Simon and Negan.  I was worried that something had happened to them, but one of the saviors at the gate told me that a majority of the men had left with them to deal with a “problem”. 

So, I worked in the kitchen. I would see Kirstin around; she had gotten a job in the gardens , and  judging by the  workers  complaining about her to others she wasn’t doing a good job. Ellen was in charge and I heard a few choice words she had for Kirstin. 

I overheard a few saviors talking one day, they were laughing about Kirstin being bullied. I didn’t believe that until I saw it with my own eyes. I went to the gardens to get a few veggies for the lunch rush, I saw Kirstin on the ground curled up in a ball, and the other workers pouring dirt on her.

“so, what if you were a wife?” one of the women sneered as she kicked Kirstin in the stomach.

“you’re a nobody now.” another snapped dumping fertilizer on her. I took a step back in surprise. Kirstin whimpered covering her head.

“Negan wouldn’t even look at you bitch!” another girl snarled grabbing Kirstin's hair. My heart pounded as I watched what was happening. I could hear 13 laughing in the back of my head.  _  this is what she deserves!  _  there was a part of me that wanted to help her, but why? Why would I want to do that? She was  a horrible person, she bullied me! She did deserve this! I noticed Kirstin looking at me, as if she wanted me to help her. I looked away and moved toward Ellen, she was nearby ignoring what was going on.

“Hey Ellen!” I greeted running up to the woman that was busy fertilizing the new crops. “do you have the veggies for lunch?” I asked. She turned to me smiling.

“I sure do, darling.” she smiled at me. I heard Kirstin cry out. I looked over to see her head being smashed in the fertilizer.

“what happened there?” I asked. Ellen looked over her shoulder, before returning to the basket in front of her.

“said something racist.” I ohh’d so she still didn’t learn her lesson. “told us that Negan was going to punish us for treating her like a slave.” I took the basket she handed me. I took one more look at Kirstin, and quickly moved away, my heart pounding. Honestly, there was nothing I could do, she was never going to change.

Later that day, I headed to my secret spot to see Kirstin sitting there crying. I sighed. Great another thing she ruined. I rolled my eyes and turned around to leave.

“why didn’t you stop them?” Kirstin asked. I stopped and turned back at her. “you always stop people bullying people, why didn’t you help me?” she asked. I stared down at her. A sharp heat of anger burst through me.

“how fucking dare, you.” I snarled. She snapped her head to look up at me. “you’re a fucking hypocrite.” I moved toward her. She stared up at me eyes wide, mouth open, skin blanched. “why the fuck should I stand up for you? You are a horrible person! You deserve this. You don’t know when to quit.” she opened her mouth to fight back. “Shut up!” I screamed. “ you bullied me all my life, you found out I liked Simon, you went to fuck him, you found out I liked Negan, you became his wife, you have humiliated me, hurt me and you think I should fucking save you? Are you insane? You did this to yourself; you deserve this. Karma is a grade  A  bitch!” I shouted. “so, go fuck yourself and if I find you in my spot again, I will shove you down these stairs until your neck breaks.” I snapped. Kirstin started to cry.

“You were so nice before.” she whimpered. I laughed.

“right, like I should be nice to you. You are the sister of a rapist, you refuse to believe what he did to us,  that’s  not right. You're not right in the head. For the  rest  of my life I'll make sure you and I never cross paths again.”  I then turned to leave.

“you bitch!” I heard Kirstin shout. I spun to see her charging at me. I took a quick side step, and she crashed in to the wall behind us. I braced myself but the door opened and Negan and Simon stepped in to the stairwell.

“there you are!” Simon said smiling at me. I gave a happy squeal and threw myself at them.

“you’re back!” I shouted hugging them. Simon kissed me on the head, so did Negan. 

“Negan?” we all looked up to see Kirstin standing there. Her face scrunched up as she started to cry. He looked down at her, he let me go. “don’t you love me?” she asked moving toward him, he caught her before she could hug him. Jealousy ripped through me.  “please.” she started to cry harder. I moved toward her protective of Negan, but  Simon's  grip on me tightened.

“come on pup.” he whispered pulling me toward the exit. “they need to talk.” I looked up at him.

“but what if she tricks him to be his wife  agai n ?” I asked. He shook his head. As Simon pulled me through the door, I saw Negan speaking softly to Kirstin.

“trust me,” he kissed me on the mouth. “I know him.” I nodded and followed him to his room. 

Once we entered  my room,  Simon gave a groan as he as he threw himself on his bed. I pulled off my shoes, as I watched him kick his off. I jumped on the bed next to him hugging him. 

“oh, it looks like someone missed me.”  he teased.  I nodded nuzzling his chest. He kissed me on the head. 

“tell me what happened.” I said as I threw my leg over his torso. Simon rubbed at his face.

“ I  don’t think you’ll like what happened.” he said softly. I looked at him in confusion, he peeked at me between his fingers. “it’s too gruesome.” I thought for a second.

“did Negan bash someone's head?” I asked softly. He nodded. “does this have to do with our people that died at the outpost?” Simon turned to look at me.

“I overheard the saviors talking about it. Also,  Cassey  was crying because her husband was killed . Kenny was killed too.” I felt my eyes gloss over. Simon gave a groan of distress and pulled me close hugging me tightly. 

“I didn’t want that darkness to get to you.” he whispered. He kissed me on the head. “ I  wanted you to keep smiling.” I kissed him on his jaw.

“I’ll keep smiling don’t worry.” he nodded and yawned, Snuggling close to me. I smiled at him as his eyes drooped close, and his breathing became even. I closed my eyes and let myself drift off to sleep. 

I gave a small sound as I felt the bed dip next to me. I could smell the leather of Negan jacket. I rolled over to see him lie down next to me, Simon's grip on my torso tighten, as he snuggled closer nuzzling my neck. Negan gave a groan as he stretched out, he rolled on his side moving closer to me. 

“hi,” I whispered as he wrapped his arms around me. Simon snorted but continued to sleep. “are you okay?”  Negan nodded rubbing at his eyes. “and Kirstin?”

“she won’t bother you anymore, I made it fucking clear.” he whispered kissing me on the forehead. I smiled up at him. He snuggled close, and with a yawn he was out.

I woke up to someone kissing my neck. I gave a soft moan, as the lips traveled to my chest. I slowly opened my eyes to see Negan's head near my chest, my shirt was pushed up exposing my bra to him. He looked up at me a grin on his lips.   _  oh shit!  _  13 shouted  _ oh shit, this is happening! _

“morning darling.” he cupped my breast, squeezing them. I bit my lip in pleasure. “look at her  Si , she makes the cutest face.” Simon made a humming sound. I looked over to see him on my other side watching me.  _  oh yes! This is like our  _ _ fanfiction _ _!!!!  _  13 screamed. My face heated up. He had a small smile on his face. I looked back at Negan. “oh, shy?” Negan teased. I looked at Simon, he leaned down kissing me on the mouth. Negan pulled off my pants and underwear in a quick movement.

“It’s okay.”  Simon  whispered. He kissed me again. Negan smiled down at me as Simon pulled away resting against the wall again. I shyly looked back  down at Negan, he kissed me hard on the mouth ,  his fingers finding my wetness. I gave a small gasp turning my face from Negan burying it in his shoulder. 

“Oh, come on bunny don’t be shy.” he whispered kissing me on the neck. “you make the cutest fucking faces.” I gave a gasp as he entered two fingers inside me.  “oh , shit the way you are clenching me, is making me hard.” he whispered covering my chest in kisses and bites.  I clutched at his shirt, whimpering as he  fingerfucked  me.   he  Pulled away from me, and sat on his knees pulling off his shirt, he reached down pulling off mine, I sat up as he reached behind me, his finger nimbly undoing my bra. my face burning red as Simon kissed at my bare shoulders. As my bra slid off me, I reached up covering my breast. Face red now that I was completely naked in front of them. Simon reached out pulling me back into his lap, my back against his bare chest. _  this is happening Steph!  _  13 screamed.  _  oh gods! we’re going to have sex with negan! _

“oh no ,  my dear.”  Simon  whispered biting at my earlobe. “you’ve hidden those away from us. We get to see them.” I whimpered as he moved my hands from my breast. Negan gave a moan reaching out to cup them.  Simon continued to kiss my neck and shoulders, his hands rubbing up and down my arms in a comforting manner.

“shit...they barely fit in my hands.” he smiled at me, then took one of my nipples in his mouth. I cried out. One of Simon’s hands moved to cup my mound. Negan bit and sucked greedily at my breast, Simon fingered me. With his other hand he took me by the chin and kissed me hard on the mouth, his fingers working me. I was close. Simon ripped his fingers from me, I gave a whimper.

“no! No!” I whimpered grinding myself against his lap.  he gave a laugh as he kissed the back of my neck. Negan gave a groan as he kissed at my breast, he quickly moved to undo his pants.

“Shit, I can’t wait.” he whispered kissing me on the mouth. He pulled my hips against his. “I need to feel how tight your pussy is.” he rubbed his cock against my clit a few times before entering me with a hard thrust. I cried out grabbing Simons thighs in my hand. Negan, gave a growl. “Fuck...” he moaned. Simon's hands massaged at my breast; Simon continued to kiss the back of my neck, whispering dirty thing in my ear. 13 was rolling around screaming in glee.

 I gave a cry as negan begun to pound into me. His movement rough and powerful, the complete opposite of Simon. Pleasure ripped through me, his grunts music to my ears. I couldn’t stop the sounds coming from my mouth. 

“fuck,  simon  you didn’t tell me how tight she was.” Negan panted. “she fucking clenching me so...” he let out a loud grunt as he continued his relentless pounding against me. I felt Simon move his hand gently over my thigh and begun to feverishly circle my clit with his fingers. I screamed in pleasure arching against his hand and Negan's hard thrust. Negan shifted pushing me against Simon. “shit, bunny.” he groaned as he worked against me. His hip snapping violently. Simon’s fingers never stopping. I could feel my orgasm mounting, Negan was kissing me, now. He pulled away to bit e  me where he can. 

“Negan,” I whimpered. He grinned down at me. “please.” I cried out as  Simon  bit my neck. 

“look at that  Si ,” negan panted. “she said please.”  Simon  gave a small chuckle as he continued to kiss my neck.  I screamed as my orgasm came out of nowhere. I clenched at Negan, my hands gripping his shoulders, I screamed their names, as another orgasm ripped through me.  “Fuck!” Negan shouted, arching against me as he came. I whimpered as Simon's fingers gently tapped on my clit. Negan groaned, as he kissed me on the mouth, he pulled away from me falling on his heels.  _  oh shit, that was intense.  _  13 whimpered.  _  more please. _   I slumped against Simon breathing hard, my mind fogged with pleasure. Simon continued to massage my breast, his hand moving to my stomach. I whimpered as Negan watched us. 

“my turn Honey.”  S imon  whispered his hands moving to my hips. “on your knees.” I looked up at him, his eyes were hooded with lust. He gave me a quick kiss before  i  moved to my knees. Negan grinned down at me, as I moved toward him. Simon’s hands massaged at my hips. “be a good girl and suck off Negan.” he said. I gave a cry as he smacked my ass.  _  oh shit, more please!  _  13 moaned as she fell over.  He rubbed at my rear. I gave a small nod, impressed that Negan was hard again. Simon smacked me again. I gave a small moan. “what do you say?”

“yes...sir.” I whispered; I felt his fingers gliding against my slit.

“you hear that Simon?” Negan said moving closer to me, he had removed his pants, now he was naked in front of me. “she’s so fucking obedient.” Simon rubbed himself against me. I whimpered as I pushed my ass against him. 

“Don’t be impatient,” Simon whispered kissing me on the neck. “we have all day.” Negan kissed me on the mouth, I could feel his grin against my mouth.

“we’re going to show you just how much we fucking like you.” Negan whispered. 

I gave a small groan as  Simon  pulled my arms through arm holes of  Negan's  white shirt. He gave a small laugh as I slumped against him, I was exhausted, my hips hurt in a delicious way, I knew I was covered in bite marks, and scratches ,  I knew that purple and red marks covered my flesh, but I didn’t care. My mouth was sore from being used, my core ached from their violent thrust, but...  _  that was awesome! _  13 shouted sighing as she lounged on a sofa smoking a cigarette. 

“how do you feel?”  Simon  asked softly bring me in his arms. Negan came out of the bathroom in his boxers, in one hand a bowl of water ,  in the other a hands towel. 

“sore, but it was worth it.” I whispered, voice hoarse from the screaming and shouting I had done. Simon pulled us toward the wall so he was against it. Negan sat at the edge of the bed.

“ open  them pretty legs so I can clean you up.” he said as he wrung the wet towel. I felt my face flush. I looked up at  Simon , he nodded.  “oh, still shy?”  Negan  gave a deep chuckle as he leaned down to kiss my thigh.  “come on, be good for daddy.” I flinched at the word daddy. 

_ Stop crying, be good for daddy!  _ Bryce's  words came out of nowhere. I whimpered in fear moving from  Negan  and curling up against Simon, slamming my eyes shut.  _ I said stop crying and fucking suck Daddy!  _ I could feel the phantom pain from the blade on my hips.

“no...” I whimpered. 

“Bunny?”

“honey?” both men asked at the same time. I felt Negan's hand on my hip, Simon rubbing my arms in comfort.  I shook my head; I could feel my body trembling. “what’s wrong?”  _  you have to tell them  _ 13 said softly.  _  it’s better to tell them. You can’t keep this inside. _

“ Bryce  would call himself daddy...” I whispered.  Keeping my eyes closed, I refused to look at them. I didn’t want the pity look that everyone gave me. I felt my heart pounding against my chest.  “he...liked it when...we called him daddy. If we didn’t, he would cut us.”

“oh, shit.” I heard  Negan  whisper. 

“I’m sorry.” I whispered. I felt another pair of hands on my back.

“no, it’s okay.”  Negan  whispered I felt him kiss the back of my head. “ I'm  so fucking sorry, bunny.” I slowly looked at him, he wasn’t Bryce. He was  Negan ,  he cared about me, he didn’t force me in to this. We had fun, he taught me things... I reached out gently placing a hand against his cheek. I looked up at Simon, he watched me with worry.

“I’m okay now.” I said softly. “he’s gone. You two are here.” I looked at Simon. Both men looked at each other. “don’t worry, just don’t call yourself...” I swallowed hard. “daddy.” the word made a flash of fear strike my heart. Both men nodded. “besides, I like ‘sir’, better.” I answered thinking about it. “more authoritative, and sexy sounding.” I looked at Negan. “like imagine we’re having sex and you’re choking me and I'm like ‘fuck me harder sir!’ like doesn’t that sound better than ‘fuck me harder daddy.’?” Negan and Simon groaned at the same time; both pushed their heads into my body.

“fuck, bunny.” Negan groaned looking up at me. “if I wasn’t fucking hard, I am now.” Simon gave a nod.

“you can’t say things like that in such a cute way.” Simon groaned. “it makes us want to fuck you.” I blushed. Simon kissed my neck; Negan kissed my neck on the opposite side of Simon.

“we can if you want .”  I said softly. “it hurts a little but I can push past it.” I answered. “I do that with Nami.”  Simon pulled away from my neck, Negan as well.

“she makes you have sex with her when it hurts?” Negan asked. I nodded.

“well, she says that it’ll go away.” I answered. I noticed Negan look up at Simon, I turned to him but he kissed me on the nose. Negan gave me a kiss on the mouth when I turned back to him. 

“why don’t we take a nap.” Negan said softly. I nodded yawning.

“good idea.” I pulled away from Simon and moved between the men, both cuddled up against me as I laid out on my back. “sweet dreams...” I whispered and sleep took over.

I slowly woke up to heated whispers in the room. I reached for the guys, but the bed was empty. I slowly sat up looking around to see Simon and Negan near my couch, both had their jaws clenched, their eyebrows lowered. Simon was clutching the back of the sofa so tightly that his knuckles turned white. Negan was clenching Lucille.

“what's going on?” I asked softly as I sat up. I rubbed at my eyes. Both men turned to me their faces softening. “are we in trouble?” I asked softly stretching. Negan shook his head.

“nothing bunny.” he answered. I noticed that he was dressed, but I could see underneath his jacket he wore no shirt. “Simon and I were just discussing work.” I made a noise of understanding. I shifted, my hips screamed in protest and my  pussy  hurt. “do you want your shirt back?” I asked. Negan shook his head, he gave Simon one last look before moving toward me, he crouched down by the bed, kissing me gently on the forehead.

“what’s wrong?” I asked softly. He shook his head ,  pushing my hair from my face. He took a glance at Simon.

“do you like being with Nami?” he asked, his gaze returning to me. I froze. I looked at Negan studying his face.  _  if we say no, would he stop being with us?  _  13 asked softly. I thought of Nami, she would be hurt if I told h er  I liked  Negan  and Simon much better.

“yeah, of course.” I said softly smiling at him. He gave a soft nod. Then kissed me again. He slowly stood up to turn to Simon, they didn’t say anything for a while.

“I'll see you later Simon, take care of our girl.” was all he said before giving me a wink and leaving my room. Simon moved toward me as soon as Negan was out of the room.

“am I in trouble?” I asked softly. Simon shook his head, kissing me on the cheek.

“no, we’re just worried.” he took a breath. “how about you go back to sleep and I'll take a shower.” I nodded. He kissed me on the mouth before moving to my bathroom. I groaned and rolled over.  Letting  sleep take me away again.

“what the hell?” I jumped at Nami's voice. I turned to the doorway, I flinched as she slammed the door. “Negan spent the night?” she asked moving toward me. “why didn’t you come get me?” she asked. 

“Negan didn’t...” I started softly. She moved to sit next to me.

“didn’t you miss me?” she asked softly. “why didn’t you think of my feelings?” she asked. I looked at her. Her eyes glossed over. “don’t you like me?” my heart was hit with guilt. She leaned down and kissed me.

“I do.” I said softly as she pulled away. She smiled at me her hand moving under the blanket. I whimpered in pain as her fingers found me. I moved away from her.

“Nami,” I started as I moved away from her. “it hurts.” I whispered. 

“it’s okay, it’ll go away.” she whispered kissing my neck. “don’t you want to make me happy?” I bit my lip. The bathroom door opened and Simon stepped out.

“she said that it hurts leave her alone.” he snapped. Nami turned to him her eyes widen. Her hand snapped away from me. She glared between the two of us.

“you fucked Simon too?” she asked. She moved to her feet. “so, you ’ ll fuck men but when I want to with the strap on, you cry?”

“it’s too big, it hurts.” I explained.

“you don’t have to explain yourself Honey.” Simon spoke up. His glare still trained on Nami. “no means no.” Nami turned to me.

“you’re supposed to be mine, not Negan's.” she snapped at me. “or his.” she sneered. Simon rolled his eyes. “it’s me or him, Steph.” she snapped. I looked at Simon. “I'm a wife, so I think Negan would realize who’s more important.” 

“fuck off.” Simon snarled. Nami glared up at him, then turned to me.

“you made the deal with me,” Nami moved back to sit on the bed next to me. “if you stop being with me, Richard and Gina will no longer have a place to call home.” Nami whispered. I bit my lip in thought. It was true. I looked up at Simon, he shook his head.   I trusted  Simon .

“I’m sorry Nami,” I started softly looking back at her. “But I’m sore and tired.” Nami glared down at me, she didn’t say anything but stormed past me ,  slamm ing  the door shut. I flinched at the sound. Simon moved to sit next to me. Guilt consumed me. 

“It’s okay,” Simon whispered as he kissed me on the forehead. I looked up at him. “She needs to understand that no means no.” I nodded. He pushed my hair from my face, his thumb gently rubbing my cheek. “Go to sleep, honey.” I nodded. Fatigue running through my body. I yawned as I laid back down on my bed. Simon pulled my covers up to my chin and kissed me gently. I fell asleep to  S imon  smiling down at me.


	12. Just When You Think It's Going to Be A Sunny Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stephanie is cornered by Nami, she admits a few things to simon and negan and she was misled.  
> warnings: smut

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys! i'm slowly writing this fic and updating. i really want to finish it since i know how it ends now. I was hit with inspiration with all the negan gifs flooding my tumblr dash, not to mention Steven ogg being a cutie. thank you for your support and reading my fic. just a reminder this will be an au of some sort since i was really sad that Simon was killed off. please enjoy! also i wrote this on my phone so there will be errors and typos.

I laid out on my stomach in Simon’s room, he was painting and I was writing a new chapter to one of my fanfictions. The sound of Simon’s paint brush scraping against the canvas was relaxing; great white noise to my thought process.

“What you up to bunny?” I looked up to see Negan sitting down next to me. I smiled at him.

“writing  a  new chapter of my  fanfiction .” Negan moved to lay on his stomach as well Looking over my notebook.

“Oh, which one? I really fucking like the one with the werewolf.” I felt my face burn red. I still got embarrassed when the guys told me they liked my stories; it was so unreal.  I mean it was  fanfiction  of them! How did they like that?

 “Did werewolf me kill Hubert yet?” 

“No,” Simon spoke up. We both looked at him, he was still painting. “She’s drawing that out, I say just kill the bastard.” I laughed. 

“A story without it’s villain isn’t a story at all, guys.” I told them. Negan boo’ed. I couldn’t help but give them a flattered smile. 

“Well Hubert is an asshole and I think you should have werewolf me rip his fucking throat out.” Negan told me kissing me on the forehead. I nodded.

“Don’t worry there’ll be a big climax.” I assured them.

“i like big climaxes.” negan grinned at me, he leaned over to kiss me on the cheek, my face burned red. I cleared my throat, he laughed. I pulled out my other notebook. 

“But I did write a new chapter with the alien girl.” Negan gave a small :  “yes!”  t a k ing  the book from my hands.

“Oh shit, I like this one.” He informed me. “Your original work blows me away.” I smiled blushing at his words.  _ He loves out writing!  _  13 cried she danced around.  _  Negan likes our writing! _  I watched as Negan flipped to the last chapter he read, he liked to reread chapters before reading the new ones. I watched him pull out his reading glasses ,  plac ing  them on. He made me swore never to tell anyone he needed reading glasses, he told me :  “it wasn’t badass enough.” He smiled at me before looking back down at the notebook.

As I returned to my work, I couldn’t help but think of  Nami .  Negan smelled like her perfume . S he was always on my mind since the last time we spoke, which had been two weeks ago.

 She had ignored me when I went to the wives’ parlor to speak with her, the next day  after simon told her to fuck off . She got up from her seat , moving  to ward  her room, slamming the door on my face. Sherry had comforted me when I started to cry of frustration. If  Nami  no longer wanted me, than that meant I would no longer be with Negan ;  I didn’t want that. After a small chat with sherry, who surprisingly knew about the deal, assured me that Negan wasn’t going to take the apartment away from Richard and Gina. I left the parlor feeling defeated and also a mix of ‘I really didn’t care.”  

“Honey,” Simon's voice brought me out of my thoughts I looked up at him. “when is Gina due?” he asked as he turned in his stool to look at me. I thought about it.

“in a month... or A few weeks, I think.” I answered. Simon tilted his head in thought. “why?”  he was wiping his hands on a hand towel.

“because I saw some cute onesies in the market and thought of grabbing them  for her .” I smiled.

“yeah! She would love that.” I told him. Simon got up from his seat moving toward me and Negan. Negan had rolled on his back holding the notebook over his head. Simon sat on my other side. He kissed me gently on the mouth. A wave of arousal burst through me. Simon pulled away smiling down at me. He pushed me back, until my back hit the ground. I gave a small moan as he  ground  himself against me.  _  oh, please Simon!  _  13 shouted.

“shit, Simon,” Negan laughed. “I’m trying to fucking read here, and you're distracting me with her cute sounds.” we both looked at Negan, he had rolled over on his stomach again, the notebook in front of him on the ground. Simon gave a chuckle, kissing me on the neck. I gave a small gasp as he bit me. “damn it, Simon!” Negan playfully scolded.

“sorry, man. she’s just so fucking cute.” he said kissing me again. He reached under my skirt, his fingers finding my pussy. “no underwear? Bold.” Simon teased my face burned.

“you guys would just rip them. I'm running out of panties.” I answered. He and Negan laughed. Simon rubbed at my clit, making me moan. Negan reached over kissing me on the mouth. I looked up at him. He smiled down at me. 

A knock on the door stopped Simon's fingers, he gave an angry groan as he rolled away from me. I sat up fixing my skirt over my knees, Negan moved to remove his glasses sitting up as well. Simon opened the door ,  Gina stood there  smiling up at him .

“hey,” she greeted smiling. “I'm sorry to interrupt guys but I need Steph for the lunch rush.” I moved to my feet, pulling on my shoes. I kissed Negan and Simon a good bye.

“we’ll finish later.” Simon whispered as he hugged me. I nodded face red. I hugged Gina as I moved past the threshold. 

“hey baby,” she smiled. I took her hand leading her toward the kitchen. “how are you?” she asked. I turned to her smiling.

“I’m fine.” I looked around making sure no one was in the hall way. “I never knew sex could be so fun!” I whispered giggling. Gina gave a laugh.

“I’m glad, are they treating you right? If not, I will knock their ass es  out.” I laughed. 

“yes, they’re very kind, and they like my stories!” she patted my head.

“that’s good.” 

“oh! Simon said he might take me back to our hideout to get a few things we left behind!” Gina gave a smile.

“oh, that’s good baby! If you do go can you get my mother's quilt?” she asked. 

“of course. But it might be a while before we can go.” I explained. She nodded. “so, what do you want me to cook?” I asked.

“I’ve been craving Meatloaf.” I nodded.

“meatloaf it is.”

As I helped Gina sever lunch, I heard someone call my name I looked up to see Sherry and the wives moving up to the counter.

“Hey guys!” I greeted. I couldn’t help but notice  Nami  wasn’t with them.

“hey, lunch was great!” sherry told me. I thanked her. “We were wondering if you made any dessert?” sherry whispered. I gave them a sad smile.

“no girls not yet, but I can tonight if you want?” I offered. Amber gave an excited smile. 

“oh please!” amber said excitedly.

“okay, what would you like?” I asked handing a tray to the worker. He smiled at me ,  mov ing  away.

“cake, with icing!” Frankie spoke up. Amber nodded. I thought for a second.

“well, Richard did make butter and Simon found that packet of powder sugar...” I thought out loud. “oh, and the group went to get the tribute, so there were strawberries.” I nodded. “okay, we’ll make cake!”

“we?” Frankie asked. 

“yep, I’m going to teach you guys how to bake.” the girls nodded.

“okay, what time should we come down?” Sherry asked.

“after dinner? The dinner rush would have died down by then, the kitchen be empty.” the girls nodded again this time excitedly.

“okay we’ll see you then.” as they moved to leave, I hurried around the counter stopping Sherry. “where’s  Nami ?” I asked softly. Sherry looked down at me a sad smile on her face.

“don’t worry about her.” she patted me on the head. She pressed her lips in a thin line for a second before starting again, “Steph, you need to know you’re not the only--”

“there you are!” I looked up to see  Nami , she hugged me tightly around the neck. I stumbled back in with surprise. “I missed you.” she whispered kissing my ear. Sherry glared down at  Nami . “so, what are you talking about?” she asked moving away from me. Sherry shook her head.

“nothing.” she stated, she then looked at me. “see you later Steph.” I gave her a small wave good bye. Sherry gave me a smile before moving away.  Nami  turned to me, she grabbed my hand in an iron grip, I bit my lip from crying  out in pain. She dragged me out the cafeteria. As I protested, she squeezed my hand harder. I bit my lip not wanting her to get angrier. 

Once we were outside, she threw me against the wall of the building, I stumbled falling against the concrete crying out. I pressed myself against the wall looking at her. There was a part on me that wanted to run, but I had a feeling that she would be angrier than she was now.

“what were you and sherry talking about?” she asked, the smile on her face was not warm.

“she just wanted to know if I could make a cake for the wives.” I whispered on the verge of tears. Her hostility making me nervous ,  scared. 

“is that all? Because it kind of looked like she was eye-fucking you.” I shrank back. Sherry was still in love with Dwight, she had confided that in me when I caught her crying in the stairwell a few days ago.

“yes.” I answered she moved closer to me. 

“i missed you, bunny.” I flinched .  the way she said “bunny” was filled with hostility, and venom. “did you miss me?” she asked. I nodded quickly not wanting to upset her. “good, but I'm upset that you haven’t apologized yet.” I looked at her with confusion.

“apologize?” I asked. She glared down at me.

“yes, you should apologize to me for the way you spoke to me and treated me the last time I saw you.” 

“but--”

“no, apologize!” she snapped. “you hurt my feelings, and you made me sad.” I stared at her, she reached out taking my face in her hands. “don’t you want me to be happy Steph?” she kissed me gently. “don’t you like me?” 

“I do.” I found myself lying. All I could think about was Negan smiling down at me earlier, I didn't want to lose that...was I being selfish? Yes.  “but I like Simon and Negan too.” I told her, she rolled her eyes ,  pul ling  away from me, giving a deep sigh.

“Simon? Out of all the saviors?” she growled. Then she smiled turning back to me. “I guess you don’t know about Mary Ann.” she crossed her arms across  her chest.  _ Mary Ann?  _  13 echoed.  _  who is that? _   She laughed at my confused face.

“she’s his wife, his actual wife. not like how Negan has me and the others. They were married before the end. She's pregnant.” she stated. Rejection and hurt stabbed at my heart. “you’re just his side pussy.” she then moved back to kiss me. “but you’ll always be my number one. When you’re ready to apologize I'll be waiting” she kissed me again before leaving. I stood there leaning against the wall. My heart pounding ,  rejection making me want to throw up. 

“Steph!” I looked up to see Gina making way toward me. “baby what's wrong?” she asked as she grabbed my shoulders. I reached up wiping the tears from my face. I gave her a smile.

“nothing.” I lied. “nothing just... nothing.” I whispered. The tears wouldn’t stop, they just kept falling. Gina pulled me in a hug.

“what's wrong?” she pressed. I shook my head still smiling at her, even though the tears wouldn’t stop; But as always, she just knew, so she hugged me tightly  letting  me cry. 

“that bitch said what?” Gina asked an hour later. We sat on my couch eating a late lunch.

“Simon has a wife, a wife-wife.” Gina stared at me.

“like from before the end married?” I gave a sad nod. “she’s pregnant.” Gina reached over hugging me.

“are you sure baby?” I shrugged wiping at my face. Gina sighed. “She’s manipulating you.” I looked up at Gina. “I’m sorry baby but that is manipulation. She's been playing you from the beginning.”

“really?” I asked softly. Gina nodded. “what do I do?” I asked softly.

“stay the fuck away from her.” 

“but what about Negan, what if I lose everything? You have a baby coming Gee.” I asked. Gina sighed.

“oh, baby your hands are tied.” Gina whispered. I gave a frustrated groan ,  cover ing  my eyes with my palms.

 There was frantic knocking at my door. I pulled my hands from my face, looking at Gina. The door  opened; Simon stepped in.

“honey!” he started but stopped when he saw Gina. “oh hey.” he said lamely as he waved at Gina. 

“oh, you have some explaining to do!” she let me go climbed to her feet ,  stomp ing  up to Simon, who backed away. I had a feeling he was scared of Gee. “you have a wife?” she snapped. “a wife-wife? And you didn’t tell my Steph?” she asked. Simon raised his hands in a calm down motion.

“no, I can explain.  Nami  boasted about what she told Steph. So, I'm here to set everything right, ma’am” he answered. Gina narrowed her eyes at him.

“okay, sit your bubble ass down and explain.” she snapped pointing to the couch. Simon came to sit next to me and Gina sat at my opposite side.

“I was married,” he started. “but we were in the act of getting a divorce.” he sighed. “I haven’t seen her for years , then  one day she was rescued with her now husband. She's pregnant with his baby, not mine.” Simon explained. “sometimes I help her with points, since her husband got hurt few months back, but we are not together.” he took my hands in his. “I really care about you Steph.” he whispered. I stared up at him. “I think you should really stay away from  Nami .” I looked at Gina.

“Gina says that she’s manipulating me.” Simon looked at Gina a grateful look on his face, he turned back to me. “she is. I'll talk to Negan about it.” 

“what if he doesn’t want to see me anymore? Or take Gina's place away.” Simon gave me a kiss on the forehead.

“don’t worry about that.” he whispered. “I will deal with it.” Gina reached over to squeeze our hands.

“okay, big boy, I forgive you. You take care of my girl.” she kissed me on the head ,  g et t ing  up. “both of you are making miss my Richard.” she told us as she moved to the front door. I got up following her. I gave her a hug. “and you, I know you’re much braver than you think.” she hugged me tightly. I nodded. She let me go, kissing me on the head with that she was gone.

 I closed the door behind me, moving back to the couch. I found myself sitting on Simons lap wrapping my arms around his neck, pressing my forehead in to his neck.

“I’m an idiot.” I whispered. Simon reached up rubbing my back in comfort. He kissed me on my forehead. 

“no, you are not.”

“I am. there’s a part of me that knows she's manipulating me.” I took a deep breath trying hard not to cry tears of shame. “I was selfish, and thought hey I can deal with her, because I'll get to be with Negan.” I looked up at him. “I'm so selfish.” he gave a small chuckle.

“who isn’t?” he asked. “sometimes you can be selfish, Honey. Lord knows you’re very selfless.” he kissed me on the mouth. I kissed him back. 

“thank you.” I whispered. I shyly found myself kissing his neck. He gave a small groan; I could feel him hardening underneath me. It excited me that I was doing that to him. I bit him, he cursed gripping my hips tightly. I pulled away from him to straddle his lap. We were making out with passion, my hips rolling against his hard cock. 

“fuck,” he moaned pulling away from me, grinding his hips against mine. With a quick movement I reached between us, undoing his pants pulling him free from his boxers. “Shit, honey.” he whispered as I stroked him a few times before I moved to sink on him. I gave a small gasp as he stretched me so good. He cursed again, moving his hand to the back of my head to pulling me close to kiss him. I moved against him in earnest, he grunted in my mouth. “fuck,” he moaned pulling away, he moved his hands on my hips gripping them tightly, he pushed himself into the cushions, thrust ing  against me with need. I cried out as he violently snapped his hips against mine.

“Simon!” I cried as I reached out clutching his shoulders.

“fuck, I love you.” he moaned. “I love you.” our movement were erratic, our cries and moans filling the room. Simon cursed, moving violently against me. I cried out arching against him as my orgasm hit me. He gave a growl and came inside me, biting my neck. I slumped against him panting, he reached up smoothing my hair against the back of my skull, kissing my sweaty forehead.

“I love you too.” I whispered kissing his throat gently. He gave a throaty laugh.

“oh, thank gods, because this would have been awkward.” he joked. I laughed pulling away from him kissing him again. He moved with me pushing me into the cushions. “now, let me show you how much I love you.” he smiled.

As Simon and I exited my room a few hours later, he kissed me on the mouth.

“okay, I have something to do.” he kissed me again. “but I have a surprise for you later.” he kissed me again. I smiled up at him as he pulled away.

“really? What is it?” I asked, he gave me a toothy grin.

“it’s a surprise Honey, so be a good girl if you want it, okay?”

“okay.” with that he gave one last kiss before hugging me. I hugged him back. He gave me one final kiss on the forehead, before going on his way. I gave a sigh moving toward the library, I felt my heart thumping against my chest. I had told Simon I loved him! He loved me back!  _ What about Negan? _  13 asked softly. My heart skipped a beat. I loved  Negan,  too right? It was possible to love two people, right?

“Bunny!” I jumped at Negan’s booming voice. I looked up to see him coming my way, his jacket open . 13 sighed dreamingly. “Where you off to cutie?” He asked moving up to me wrapping an arm around my shoulders pulling me close.

“I don’t know.  I was thinking the library. ” I  answered . Negan led me down the hall, I followed him. “Wh y do you ask ?” I asked smiling up at him.  He grinned down at me.

“ Well, I found something you might like.”  I tilted my head up at him . “It’s my surprise for you .” I found myself smiling up at him.

“Really?” He nodded.

“Yep,” he looked up whistling at his men following us, they nodded silently moving past us. “Let’s go.” As his hand took my heart skipped a beat.

I sat next to  Negan  in the truck,  Arat  driving. My heart pounding, I excitedly looked out the window, it had been a while since I’ve been out of the sanctuary. 

“Where are we going?” I asked looking up at  Negan , he was studying my face, a boyish grin on his lips.

“It’s a surprise bunny.’ He whispered kissing me gently on the forehead. “I know that you’re going to love it though.” I sat back holding his hand, excitement bubbling through me.  _ He's giving us a surprise!  _  13 screamed jumping around in excitement.

Half an hour later  Negan  was waking me up, I gave a small groan stretching.

“Wake up sleeping bea uty .” He teased  pushing my hair from my face, I gave him a sleepy grin. “Ready for that surprise?” He asked. I nodded as he took my hand. Negan helped me out of the truck leading me  into the trees of the woods. As we moved deeper in to the woods  the air begun to smell sweet.

“Smells good!” I chirped looking up at Negan.

“Yeah it fucking does.” He smiled. As we moved into a clearing, I saw the brambles of wild blackberries. I gave a surprised gasp letting go of Negan's hand running toward the thicket. 

“No way! Blackberries!” I turned to  negan . “Me and Gina were craving  a blackberry  cobbler!” I told him. He nodded.

“ Oh,  I know. the kitchen staff are bitching about you two whining about blackberry cobbler.” Negan laughed. I gave a fake pout.

“But nobody grows blackberries.” I told him. He nodded, he held up  an  empty bucket.

“Now, bunny here’s your fucking chance to make your cobbler desires.” I gave an excited squeal  taking the bucket from his hand, kissing him on the cheek  and moving toward the brambles.

“ Negan ,” I called as I begun to pick the berries. “ May you please help me?” I heard him chuckle.

“Of course, my bunny.”  I turned to smile at him.  He moved up next to me, that charming grin on his lips .

As we picked berries we spoke of our lives before  the end.  I told him about my grandfather and cousin , about old friends. Negan told me he used to be a coach, and laughed about the stupid things  his students used to say .

“So, you’re saying that you kissed your professor and didn’t get it on?” He asked. I laughed wiping my mouth with the cloth napkin. We were taking a break, eating an early dinner. Negan was laid out on his side looking up at me, his leather jacket was off, wrapped around my shoulders. 

“No,” I felt my face flush. “he forced the kiss!” I explained. Negan made a noise of understanding. “I found out I wasn’t the only one he kissed.” 

“well, shit, you’re so fucking innocent he probably wanted to take advantage of you.” I gave a sad nod lowering my Tupperware. Nami suddenly coming to mind. The pain I felt when she slammed me against the concrete wall, came back. Negan reached out pinching my cheek. I looked up at him. “what’s wrong?”

“nothing just thinking.” I smiled at him.  he took a bite from his food, watching me as I picked at the food in the tupperware.

“Bunny,” he sat up placing the  tupperware  on the blanket. I looked up at him. “fat joey saw Nami throw you against the concrete wall.”  _ oh no!  _ 13 said softly. “why did she do that?” I felt my eyes gloss over, the tears threatening to  fall.  I looked down at my food. I knew I was going to cry if he kept staring at me. “Stephanie.” his hand came in to my view, he cupped my face. “I need to know.” I found myself telling him the truth, tears streaked my face as I sobbed to him. When I was done, he didn’t say anything, he just held me close.

“I'm sorry.” I whispered. I felt him kiss the top of my head. I looked up at him.

“don’t be, you were scared.” I nodded. He kissed me gently on the forehead. I stared up at him, studying his face. A part of me in awe that here I was in Negan’s arms, and another part scared, that this was nothing but a dream. “I told Simon I loved him.” Negan looked down at me.

“oh.” 

“But I love you too.” he raised an eyebrow.

“you do?” I nodded. “are you sure?” I laughed.

“yeah! I love you Negan.” he didn’t say anything. He stared at me.  _  did we say something wrong?  _  13 asked softly. I looked away pulling from him. “I don’t expect you to say it back silly.” I began to put our food away, back into the basket. “but in a way you do love me.” I looked up at me.

“I do?” he asked that boyish grin on his lips. 

“yeah! You're nice to me, and you brought me to get blackberries!” he laughed. 

“so, are you in love with us or you love us?” he asked. I thought for a second, I felt my face go red. 

“that’s a secret!” he laughed he moved close kissing me gently on the mouth. His hand moving to taking  mine.  “thank you.” I whispered when he pulled away.  _ Girl! What?  _ 13 asked. My face burned with embarrassment,  _ why’d  _ _ You _ _  thank him?  _ He gave me a confused look before snorting and bursting into laughter. 

“why are you thanking me?” he asked laughing.

“I don’t know!” I laughed with him. “ I  guess it was nice of you to bring me here, and have a picnic with me.” I told him. He grinned. “I'm really grateful Negan, thank you.” he kissed me again, this time it was hard and needy. I gave a small whimper as he pushed me back on the blanket. His hands roaming my hips and torso. “wait,” I whispered pulling away. “ arat ? The others?” 

“she and the others were told to stay away from here, and patrol the perimeter.” he answered, his hands moving under my skirt massaging my thighs. I bit my lip. He looked down at me as if he was waiting for my permission.

“okay,” I pulled him down to kiss his neck, I bit at his flesh. He groaned. “but I want to be on top.” 

“fuck me bunny.” he groaned pulling away to kiss me hard on the mouth. With a quick movement Negan was on his back and I was straddled on his hips. I rolled my hips against his. He cupped my breast sitting up to bite at them. I reached up unzipping my hoodie, I was wearing a tank top underneath. He pulled my tank top down exposing my chest to him. I reached between us undoing his belt and pants. He groaned in my chest as I worked his hard cock.

“Negan?” I whimpered as he bit my nipple. his hand moved under my skirt lifting me slightly, and squeezing my ass. I moved my hips rubbing myself against him. We both groaned as I sank on him. He pressed his forehead against mine, our breaths heavy, hands roaming each other's bodies. 

“gods, bunny please move.” I gave a soft laugh. I gently rode him, he clutched me to him, my arms moved to wrap around his neck. He kissed my shoulders, his one of his hands gripping my hips helping me move against him, another was on the back of my head gripping my hair. “like this bunny.” he whispered, I whimpered in pleasure as he helped me work myself on him. 

“Negan.” I whispered afraid of being too loud, I didn’t want walkers making way to us. He kissed my temple, whispering encouragements.  “fuck...” I gave a high-pitched whine as I felt my orgasm building, I was so close. “Negan.” he gave a grunt as his hips moved up word to meet my rhythm. I cried out clutching at him. He kissed me hard on the mouth. 

“fuck!” Negan shouted as he pulled from my kiss. with a quick movement he pushed me on my back, snapping his hips against mine in earnest. “bunny... fuck...Steph!” arching against him crying out as my orgasm hit. Negan gave a groan as he collapsed on top of me. Our breathing heavy, me trembling from aftershocks. Negan gave me a gentle kiss on the neck. 

“Negan?” I whispered. He pushed himself on his elbows to look down at me. “can we do it again?” he gave a laugh kissing me gently.

“ of course,  bunny.”

As I carried the bucket full of blackberries to the kitchen my body was still thrumming from my time with Negan. As we went our separate ways, Negan had kissed me on the head telling me that I was going to love Simon’s surprise. I was excited as I made  way  to the kitchen, my mind filled with all these ideas of what  Simon's  surprise would be.

As I entered the kitchen, I saw it was dinner time. The cooks and cleaners were rushing around getting things ready. As I moved to find Gina, I was stopped by Roy. I frowned at him.

“what the fuck you want?” I asked glaring up at him.

“Simon said that I had to take you to his surprise.” he didn’t sound happy. I narrowed my eyes at him. “look, I'm not too happy either, he said that I had to take you to the location and he’ll show up.” I tilted my head at him. He sighed reached for his walkie talkie. He pressed a button. “Go for Simon, she doesn’t believe me.” the walkie beeped. 

“Honey, trust me.”  _ why Roy?  _  13 asked. “I know you’re wondering why Roy.”  _ oh shit could he read my mind?  _ 13 asked. “because he’s the only one available, Laura is here helping me get things ready. Roy will behave trust me.” I glared up at Roy who rolled his eyes. “Honey trust me.”  Simon  voice came through the walkie.

“fine.” I said I placed the bucket on the table stopping Pops who was passing by with a tray of food. “pops, can you tell  Gina  that we got Blackberries. I’ll be back.” pops looked at Roy. “he’s taking me to Simon’s surprise!” pops gave me a smile.

“oh, girly you’re  gonna  love it.” pops told me, he then turned to Roy. “if anything happens to her, you’re going to get it.”  Roy  rolled his eyes again.

“let’s just go.” he snarled pushing past us. I gave Pops a hug.

“oh, I'm supposed to teach the wives to bake a cake after dinner, if I'm late tell them I'll be back soon.” Pops nodded. I ran after Roy excitement running through me.  _ Oh! I'm so excited about Simon's surprise!  _  13 giggled. I nodded to myself. 

As I caught up with Roy, I watched him enter a small car. I climbed in to the passenger seat excitement overcoming me. I pulled on my seatbelt as Roy started the car, he gave me a look and rolled his eyes. I ignored him, I had better things to think about.

“hey wake up.” I sleepily opened my eyes. The car lights were on and I saw we were at our old hideout!  _ No way!  _  13 shouted jumping up and down excitedly.  _ Simon kept his promise!  _ I saw that the lights in the house was on, I remembered the generator Richard and pops had installed. I was surprised it still worked. “come on.” Roy growled. I undid my seat belt, hurried out of the car moving toward the house.

 I burst through the front door. Memories flooded me, the good memories, the heartfelt. The house was ransacked unfortunately, but I didn’t care. I hurried up the stairs to my old room. As I entered, I was hit with nostalgia. A lot of the furniture was gone, old books were thrown everywhere. My bed was gone, but piles of my old bedding was on the floor. I shifted through the pile looking for my old teddy bear. I gave a victorious cry as his dirty ear poked out from under an old pillow. I snatched up the bear hugging it tightly. I looked around looking for something to put him in for safe keeping. An old backpack tucked in the corner of the room caught my attention. I grabbed it shook the dust off of it, I opened it stuffing Mr. Raspberry Jam inside.

 I moved from my room toward Gina’s and Richard’s room. I had promised to get her, her mother’s quilt. As I searched the ransacked room, I found it folded neatly in the closet. I quickly stuffed it in my backpack. I moved toward the staircase and out the door. As I placed the backpack in the front seat, Roy’s walkie talkie was going off. Simon’s voice was coming through he sounded angry, as well as  Negan .

“where the fuck  is  she?” Negan's voice roared. Confused I picked up the walkie talkie.

“don’t know boss.” came  Arat’s  voice. “we can’t find her.”

“Find her!”  Simon's  voice came.

“Simon!” I said as I pressed the button. Excited to hear their  voices.

“honey?”

“Bunny?” their voice sounded relieved.

“yeah! I'm so glad that that your surprise was taking me back here to get my teddy bear.”

“honey, what are you talking about?”  Simon's  voice came out a little firm. 

“where the fuck  are  you?” Negan demanded.

“I'm here at my old hideout. Remember where we first met?” I answered softly. “ Roy  brought me here.”

“Baby, that wasn’t were Roy was supposed to take you!”  Simon  shouted. 

“but--” I cried out as the walkie was hit out of my hand. I looked up to see Kirstin, in her hand she had a tennis racket. I could hear Simon and Negan shouting my name from the walkie.  “what?” I cried out as Roy came up behind me his arm wrapping around my neck. I cried out grabbing at his arm. I struggled in his hold as he chocked me.  _ No! Kick him! Bite him!  _  13 screamed.

“she said keep her alive.” was the last thing I heard before darkness took me away.


	13. Call Her A Savior

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of steph’s kidnapping, she saves kirstin, gets closer to sherry and meets the new prisoner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finally have a plot line!!! Also i realized that i haven’t wrote a lot of negan/ steph scenes. Also i wrote this on my phone so expect grammar errors and typos sorry.

I woke up to harsh whispering. I slowly sat up looking around.

“what the fuck Kirstin!” Roy snarled. “you said that we wouldn’t be involved!” I tried to move my hair from my face only to see my wrist were shackled together. My eye sight was still adjusting. I saw three figures at the doorway.

“we have to trust her! She can--” Kirstin was cut off. I saw Kirstin turned to look at me. The third figure whispered something before leaving.

“what’s going on?” I asked softly. Roy moved up next to me. He started to undo the cuffs.

“what are you doing?!” Kirstin shrieked. Roy pulled the cuff off of me.

“I'm letting her go this stupid plan’s not going to work babe.” he told her.  she screamed hitting Roy upside the head with the tennis racket. I cried out moving out of the way. Roy fell to the ground his head bleeding. She hit him again.

“You never fucking listen to me!” she screamed hitting him one more time. I watched in horror.

“Are you insane!?” I shouted moving toward Roy, checking on his wound. A cut on his temple bled profusely. Kirstin screamed at me to shut up and ran out the room. “Roy are you okay?” I asked softly he groaned. I looked around realizing I was in their old room. I saw an old shirt hanging off a desk chair. I grabbed it pressing it to his forehead. “put pressure on your wound I'll be back.” he gave a sluggish nod.

Rolling to my feet, I stumbled my legs were prickly. I gave a small groan as I moved toward the room exit. I hurried toward the front door. As I exited the house I saw another car tearing out of the area, Kirstin screaming after them.

“you swore!” she screamed throwing the racket after the car. I moved toward Roy’s car looking for the walkie, it was gone as well as the keys. I gave a curse hitting the door.

 I jumped as loud sound filled the area. Bright lights burst through the sky; my heart fell. Firecrackers.

“Fucking bitch!” Kirstin screamed. A noise caught my attention, I looked up to see walkers coming from all directions moving toward us. I ran toward Kirstin grabbing her arm.

“let’s go!” I shouted pulling her toward the house. She gave a gasp when she realized that walkers were heading our way.

As we ran toward the house, as we burst through the front door. We hurried to slam the door shut. We screamed as walkers pushed at the door reaching through the crack.

 “upstairs!” I shouted. We both let the door go running up the stairs. I moved to get Roy; Kirstin didn’t follow. As I moved into the room, I saw Roy standing. “Roy?” I asked, he turned to me his eyes milky white, he growled. I screamed slamming the door shut as he leaped at me. I moved away from the door. “Kirstin?” I shouted. I looked up to see her closing the attic door. “bitch!” I screamed.

As I moved toward my room, the walkers were rushing up the stairs. I slammed my room door behind me locking it. I looked around trying to find anything to put against the door. I could hear the groaning of the walkers out the door, the door creaked against their weight. I moved toward the window opening it. Something caught my eye; it was Roy's walkie talkie. I snatched it up, before climbing out the window. I slammed the window shut as the door broke apart and a herd of walkers crawled in the room.

I moved from the window stared down at the garden, it was filled with walkers. Tears of fear streamed down my face. I knew I wasn’t going to survive this. I turned on the walkie talkie. 

“Simon? Negan?” my voice cracking with emotion.

“bunny?”

“Honey, are you okay?” I let out a sob.

“No,” I took a breath. “I’m surrounded by walkers. I don’t think I'm going to make it. Roy turned; Kirstin locked me out of the attic.”

“where are you?” Simon asked.

“I’m on the roof.” I took a breath. I could hear the walkers banging against the window. “the windows going to break soon. I love you both.” I cried out as the glass of the window broke. The dead growling and reaching for me. Screaming, I scrambled away from the window, crawling over the tiles. I could hear the walkers snarling and groaning. I felt something grab at my skirt. I spun on my back kicking the face of the walker. My skirt ripped in its grip. I crawled away toward the front of the house.

I slipped, sliding down the roof. I screamed as the horde of walker below came closer and closer. I cried out as I slammed on something hard. I curled up in a ball ready for the hands to rip me apart but it never came. Thinking of my friends, Simon and Negan in my last few minutes.

 Gunshots rang out making me jump. Voices shouted instructions. I slowly sat up to see I was on top of a moving truck bed. I looked over the edge to see people moving toward the walkers, some with spears, other with knives. I screamed as one of the walkers from the roof tumbled next to me. Strong arms pulled me from back. A gunshot rang out, the walker went still, a familiar smell surrounded me.

“Simon?” I asked looking up at him dazed. He didn’t say anything but pulled me in a bear hug.

“oh shit, we thought we lost you.” he whispered his voice cracking, hugging me tightly. I couldn’t help it I burst in to sobs. “it’s okay.” he whispered stroking my hair. “we’re here now.”

“Kirstin-- roy—killed—attic.” I sobbed.

“Bunny? Bunny!” I pulled from Simon to see Negan running up to the truck. Simon helped me down. Negan dropped Lucille as he pulled me in a hug, I wrapped my arms around his neck, he picking me up off the ground. “oh fuck, baby I thought...” he didn’t finish his sentence, he buried his face in my neck.

“I was so scared.” I sobbed.

“I know, baby.” he whispered. “I know.” he gently placed me on the ground. Simon reached out smoothing my hair against my skull.

“Negan,” we all turned to see Arat dragging Kirstin from the house. “we found her in the attic.” Negan growled. He picked up Lucille moving toward the blonde with an enraged stride.

“what the fuck!?” he shouted grabbing Kirstin the arm shaking her. “what the fuck were you thinking?” He roared shaking her again. She looked up at him, tears running down her eyes.

“She killed Roy.” I spoke up. “She killed Roy! I know he was a dick but why?” I asked Kirstin. She turned to me her eyes dead.

“it was an accident.” She answered. “this wasn’t supposed to happen.”

“You’re fucking crazy!” I shouted. Simon pulled me to his chest, as I swung at her. I looked up at Simon. “She killed Roy!”

“She was about to kill you bunny.” Negan spoke. I looked up at him. The tight feeling, I felt in the back of my neck came, The stress, the realization. I stared at Kirstin; the prickling came. I looked up at Simon, he watched me with worry.

“fuck.” I whispered and the tremors came. everything went black.

 

I woke up with a scream ripping from my throat. My nightmare chasing me as I woke up.

“Bunny!” A voice shouted; hands grabbed at me. I screamed slapping at them.

“Honey it’s okay.” Another voice said. I stopped fighting against the hands to see Simon and Negan sitting at either side of me. I stared at them. Heart pounding, the nightmare still fresh in my mind.

I looked around to see I was in Negan’s room. Simon reached out to cup my cheek. His eyes were red and puffy, I turned to look at Negan.

“What happened?” I asked softly.

“You’ve been asleep for a day.” I looked around confused. The memories of yesterday slowly creeping back.

“Kirstin?” I asked softly. Simon nodded.

“Don’t worry she’s in a cell, Negan is going to punish her.” I looked at Negan, he nodded reaching out smoothing my hair down.

“I’m so fucking sorry,” he whispered. “I was supposed to keep you safe.” I reached out taking his hand in mine.

“You did!” I told him giving him a smile. “See, I’m here in your room.” Negan gave me a soft smile. There was a frantic knock at the door. Simon got up moving to open the door.

“Is she awake?” It was Gina. Simon nodded moving aside as a Gina, Richard, and Pops hurried in the room. Negan stood up moving aside so Gina could climb on the bed to hug me.

“Oh, my baby girl!” Gina sobbed. “I was so worried!” She kissed me on the forehead. I hugged her back. Richard moved to hug the three of us and pops hugged us all. We were his self-proclaimed children.

“Shit girly,” pops sobbed. “I thought you were…” he trailed off hugging us tightly.

“I’m okay guys!” I said. “Negan and Simon saved me.” They pulled from me to turn to the men in question. Pops moved to thank Simon and Negan; Richard followed.

“And Kirstin?” Gina asked rubbing my back, she looked up at Negan.

“She will be punished.” He answered. Gina nodded. She looked down at me.

“I have to go back to work baby, but I want you to rest.” She looked at Simon and Negan. “No sex. Dr. Carson made that clear.” Simon and Negan grinned at her.

“We know.” They sang. Gina patted both men on the cheek before leaving, Richard gave me one quick hug before following Gina. Pops patted me on the head, then left. Simon kissed me gently on the mouth, Negan followed.

“rest up bunny.” Negan smoothed my hair against the back of my skull. “we’ll see you later.” I nodded.

“do not get out of this bed, until tomorrow.” Simon told me. I nodded again. Simon placed my backpack on my lap. “I brought you, your stuff so you don’t get bored.” I smiled up at him.

“thank you!” I pulled my backpack toward me. “be safe okay.” they both nodded Kissing me once again.

“remember no getting out of that fucking bed,” Negan told me. “or we’ll spank that precious ass of yours.” my face burned red. Negan laughed.

“it’s true we will.” Simon teased. With that they left.

“Steph?” I looked up to see Nami, she stood by the door. My heart begun to pound. Anxiety tore through me. “oh, I'm so glad you’re okay!” she moved toward me. “when they said you were missing, I was so worried!” she tried to hug me but I moved away from her. She stopped looking at me with faux confusion. “what’s wrong baby?”

“don’t.” I whispered. “you hurt me Nami. I don’t want to see you right now.” I told her remembering my friends’ kind words, and feeling brave. Nami scowled at me.

“I'm here to make sure you’re okay. You should be grateful.” she snapped. I flinched at her tone.

“Nami,” I started she reached out grabbing a fist full of my hair. I cried out in pain. “stop!” I reached up grabbing her wrist. “You're hurting me!” I shouted squeezing her wrist. She cried out releasing my hair. I shoved her away from me. She stumbled back grabbing her wrist. Eyes glossed over; she didn’t say anything but turned around running out Negan's room.

I sat there, staring at the door Nami had fled through. I took a few breaths, my heart pounding against my ribcage. The tears fell. Why was I so stupid?

“Steph!” I looked up to see Sherry entering the room, she moved toward the bed. “Oh honey.” she whispered climbing on the bed hugging me. “What did Nami do?” I sobbed against her as she comforted me. I told Sherry what happened. She gave a frustrated growl. “listen to me.” I looked up at her. “she knows how naive and innocent you can be, she’s going to keep trying.”

“Why me?” Sherry sighed.

“Because in a horrible world like this you’re the only one that keeps smiling.” sherry took breath. “you’re oddly optimistic for the end of the world. Also, she’s a fucking manipulative bitch.” sherry rubbed my back gently.

“she hates Simon.” sherry snorted.

“Of course, she does.” I looked up at her in confusion. “Simon is Negan's right-hand man. Negan listens to Simon, and if Simon is around, she can’t get away with anything. Simon was the one that told Negan to punish Nami for...” Sherry trailed off. “what she did to you while you were drugged.” I looked at her.

“I’m so stupid.” sherry shook her head.

“Naive? Yes. But not stupid sweetheart.”  Sherry squeezed me. “Steph, I was trying to tell you in the cafeteria yesterday, was that you’re not the only one she manipulated.” I looked up at her. Sherry gave a tired sigh. “I should let you rest Sweetie.” she begun to pull away.

“No, please stay.” she smiled gently at me.

“of course.” we cuddled up. Sherry telling me stories about her and Dwight. She mentioned her sister, but as her voice broke, I didn’t push her.

I woke up to Sherry moving, and her whispering to someone. I slowly reached for her, but a gloved hand grabbed mine. I opened my eyes to see Negan smiling down at me.

“How are you doing Bunny?” I reached for him, he let me wrap my arms around his neck. I watched Sherry leave, I gave her a wave as she looked my way, she smiled at me before leaving the room.

“Sleepy.” he gave a soft chuckle rubbing my back.

“then sleep,” he whispered. “I’ll be here.” I gave a slow nod letting my mind drift off to sleep. “I will always be the here...” Negan's voice faded away.

 

The next day Dr. Carson gave me the okay to get back to work. as I made my way to the cafeteria, I noticed not many saviors or workers hung around. Gina was kneading dough when I entered the kitchen, Richard pacing behind her.

“Steph!” he moved toward me. “are you okay?” I nodded.

“yeah, I'm fine Dr. Carson gave me the a-okay!” Richard looked at Gina who was watching me. I noticed the kitchen staff was short. “where is everyone?” I asked.

“I told you.” Richard told Gina. I looked between the two.

“what’s going on?”

“Negan’s called an execution on Kirstin. Everyone's there.” Gina answered.

“What!?” I looked at her in horror. “he can’t kill Kirstin!”

“why not?” Gina asked. “she tried to kill you.” Gina didn’t know about the third figure! I was so tired the other day that it had slipped my mind! I didn’t say anything. I ran for it. Praying that I made it in time.

 

I tore through the area shoving people out of my way.

“Negan!” I shouted, not caring if people looked my way. I shoved fat joey out of the way shouting a “sorry” as I came up to Negan. Kirstin was on her knees in front of him, sobbing. Negan was holding Lucille up. Simon moved toward me a grim look on his face. “Please don’t kill her!” I shouted as Simon wrapped his arms around me pulling toward the crowd. I struggled in his hold. “Please, Simon.” I looked up at him.

“Bring that cute ass bunny over here Si!” Negan called. Simon looked over at Negan, he gave a curt nod pulling me toward Negan. As I came up next to him, he wrapped an arm around my shoulders. “Now tell me baby girl, why I shouldn’t kill Kirstin? She tried killing you, she killed Roy and she kidnapped you.” I looked down at the blonde. There was a part of me that knew what Kirstin did was horrible, But I knew there was someone behind this; the third figure was to blame.

“She was manipulated.” I spoke up. A movement caught my attention, Nami and the wives stepped up to the circle, Laura was their guard. “There was somebody else there. Right Kirstin?” The blonde looked up at me. She glanced at Negan. “Right Kirstin?” I repeated. She looked back at me.

“Why are you trying to save me?” She asked. “I did what they’re accusing me of. I’m guilty.”

“Kirstin, I known you since we were kids you may be a bitch, you may be full of yourself but you’re not a killer.” She raised an eyebrow. “Okay, you killed Roy, but did you know that someone can die if you hit them hard enough in the temple?” She looked at Simon then at Negan shaking her head. “See. You’re easily manipulated.”

“Gods, I hate you.” She snarled tears suddenly running down her face. “You— you and your stupid smile, your stupid way you see people. You’re so fucking nice it make me sick. I fucking hate you.” She wiped at her face. “Why are you trying to save me!?” She shouted.

“Because I know your dumb ass!” I shouted back. “Your brother fucked you up. You’re a fucking victim!” She burst in to tears. I turned to Negan. “Please, please don’t kill her. She was manipulated!” He looked down at me cupping my face in his hand.

“What do you have in mind to punish her then?” He asked. I looked down at Kirstin she continued to sob. I looked at her pretty blonde hair, her flawless skin. I looked up at Simon. He stared back at me his warm brown eyes filled with worry. I turned back to Negan knowing the answer to his question.

“Take away her beauty. Her hair and flawless skin.” I whispered. Kirstin looked up at me eyes wide. “I’m sorry Kirstin, this might be the only way you’ll learn.”

“You should fucking thank Stephanie; she just saved your fucking life.” Negan told Kirstin. He turned to Simon. “Get the iron ready.” Simon nodded moving away from me. Negan turned to me smiling, he squeezed my shoulder. “You always surprise me you know that bunny.” He whispered. He gave me a soft kiss on the temple. I looked up noticing that Nami was glaring at me. Negan removed his arm from my shoulder to look at Simon as he came up behind us.

“Get her in a chair.” Simon called, two saviors moved grabbing Kirstin by the arms, another pushed a seat underneath the girl. They tied Kirstin to a chair, her sobs echoing in the area. Sherry made a ‘come here’ gesture with her hand, I nodded moving toward her, but stopped when Negan grabbed my arm.

“Where do you think you’re going?” He asked. “You’re going to be the one to give her, her makeover.” My mouth opened in shock.

“What?” I squeaked.

“You’re the one she tried to kill you, baby.” He whispered. Simon handed me a pair of scissors. I stared down at the scissors. I looked at Kirstin who stared at me while tears continued to streak down my face. “Cut her hair baby.” I looked at Negan in horror, he gently pushed me toward Kirstin. I looked up at Simon, then at Sherry. She had a horrified look on her face.

“do it, honey.” Simon caught my attention. He moved up to me. “She needs to be punished. I know this is horrible, but she needs to learn, they all do.” I looked at Kirstin’s blonde hair, she loved her hair, she loved taking care of it. It always looked soft and healthy. I slowly moved up to Kirstin, she shrieked at me, tried to kick me.

“it’s better than having your head bashed in.” I hissed at her. She looked at me.

“you fucking bitch.” she snarled, she looked at Negan. “anyone but her! Negan snapped his fingers; two saviors came for the grabbing Kirstin by the shoulders and neck holding her still. I took a breath grabbing her hair twisting it in my left hand. I sliced the wad off. I stared at the golden strands in my hand. I dropped it looking at Negan.

“continue.” he told me. I looked back at Kirstin, I did as I was told. I managed to cut all of her hair off, keeping what was left over close to her skull. Kirstin sobbed cursing me. I dropped the scissors to the ground, my heart pounding. I tried to leave to sherry, but Negan grabbed my arm again. I looked up at him. “bunny,” he started softly. "you’re not finished.” Simon came up to us, the red-hot iron in his gloved hand.

“no,” I whimpered. Negan pulled me close mouth on my ear. “please.”

“I know baby,” he whispered lowly. “but she has to be punished, these people have to see what happens when someone breaks the rules.” he gave me a soft kiss on the ear. “I know you’re not like me, but you have to do this.” I looked up at him eyes glossed over. Simon handed me a leather glove. I looked up at him.

“it’ll be fast honey, I promise.” he said softly. I gave a whimper as Negan slipped my hand in the glove. Simon held out the iron, I took it gently. Negan wrapped a hand around my wrist moving me closer to Kirstin.

“we’re doing both cheeks.” he told me. “now just press it to her face.” I looked away, closing my eyes. I felt Negan move my hand forward. Kirstin shrieked in pain. I bit the inside of my cheek from crying. The smell was horrible. “see not so hard.” he pulled my hand back, and pushed it forward again, the smell returned, Kirstin screamed. Negan pulled my hand away. “you did a fucking fantastic job!” he told me. I felt the iron being pulled from my hand. “good job bunny.” Negan whispered kissing me on the head. I didn’t want to open my eyes; I didn’t want to see Kirstin in such a manner. “Simon, take our bunny away from this mess.” I felt two hands grab my shoulder. I gave a dry sob as I was pulled in to warmth.

“Don't look okay.” Simon whispered. I nodded. My legs felt jelly like, it was hard to breathe the smell making me sick. I stumbled as we moved from the area. Simon wrapped an arm around my waist hoisting me against him.

When Fresh air hit my face, I finally opened my eyes. I felt nausea rush through me. I pulled from Simon, vomiting.

“fuck,” I heard Simon whisper. He rubbed at my back, whispering comforting things. “it’s okay honey.”

“that was horrible.” I whispered.

“I know.” Simon answered. “but she had to be punished.” I looked over at him. He pulled me into a hug. “fuck, no matter how much I want to protect you I fail every time.” Simon voice cracked. “I hate that you have to see all this shit. I just want you to keep smiling...” I covered my mouth with my hand.

“I’ll keep smiling Simon.” I told him. “you guys always protect me!” he smiled at me.

“why are you covering your mouth?” he asked.

“I just threw up.”

“so?” he leaned down trying to kiss me I squealed.

“no! I just threw up!” he laughed then kissed me on the forehead. I thought of Kirstin. “what happens now?” I asked softly.

“she’ll be looked after while she heals then locked up.” I made a sound of understanding. We heard someone call his name. “look honey, I have to go; but I promise we can spend time later okay?” I nodded. He kissed me on the cheek.

“be safe, Simon.” he smiled at me.

“Always.” he gave me one more kiss before he left. I looked up to see Regina exit the building, I gave her a smile. She nodded her head at me before following after Simon. A familiar smell drifted from her. _Nami's perfume?_   I watched after Regina, remembering what Sherry had told me.

 

As I made way to my secret spot, I heard soft sobs. I peeked over the railing to see Sherry sitting on the steps a level below me. _Our friend’s crying_ 13 spoke surprising me.  13 had been really quiet for the past few days. Sherry wiped at her face with a handkerchief. Worried for my friend, I moved down toward her.

“are you okay Sherry?” I asked softly as I came up beside her. She jumped looking up at me. She shook her head. “what’s wrong? Is Nami picking on you now?” she gave a soft laugh.

“no, honey.” she gave me a teary smile. “I think I'm pregnant.” my heart skipped a beat.

“Negan?” I whispered. She shook her head.

“no, Dwight.” looked at her in shock.

“but Negan's number one rule is no cheating!” I moved down to sit next to her. She gave a slow nod.

“I still love my husband.” she paused. “husband-husband.” I thought about Dwight. He still loves Sherry; I could see it when he looks at her.

“how do you know it’s Dwight’s?” I asked. “what if it’s Negan's?” sherry looked at me studying my face. She didn’t answer, just patted me on my head.

“will you come with me to the hospital wing?” she asked softly. I nodded.

“of course!” I smiled at her.

 

I sat on the visitor chair watching Sherry and Dr. Carson speak to one another. The door opened, I looked up to see a strange dirty man enter first, Dwight followed behind clutching at the back of his sweater. Sherry stepped off the hospital seat, I stood up.

“Hi D.” sherry said softly smiling at him. Dwight greeted her back.

“hey Steph.” I gave him a small wave. Sherry looked at the strange man.

“Daryl, right?” she asked. Dwight snapped at her not to speak to the stranger. I looked at sherry, she glanced at me. I reached for Sherry’s hand moving her close to me so Daryl could sit on the hospital seat. _Oh no! Dwight’s gonna see the test!_  13 shouted. But it was too late. Dwight’s head snapped to Sherry. I saw the hurt in his eyes. There was a part of me that wanted to grab him and shout: “no you fool it’s yours!” but I swore to secrecy to Sherry.

“it’s negative.” she hurried looking away from him.

“maybe next time.” he said looking away from her, sherry’s grip on my hand tightened. I looked at her. Her face crestfallen. Sherry looked at Daryl.

“whatever they say, just do it.” she told him. Dwight snapped at her again, we both looked at Dwight, his voice even and cold. Sherry pulled me toward the exit. I gave Dwight a small wave good bye.

As soon as we entered the stairwell, sherry burst in to tears. I hurried to hug her.

“he hates me.” she sobbed. I shook my head.

“why didn’t you tell him?” I asked. She shook her head.

“there are too many ears, he’ll get punished again!”

“He loves you.” I whispered. She wiped at her face.

“really?” I nodded.

“yeah!” I tilted my head in thought. “he’s hurt right now.” I told her taking her hands in mind. “but tell him!” she shook her head.

“I have to protect him, Steph.” I took a breath, she was right. If Negan found out Sherry slept with Dwight...he could kill him this time.

“come on, I'll walk you to the parlor.” I smiled at her she nodded.

 

As we arrived at the parlor, I saw Negan exiting the parlor.

“there you are dear wife!” he called. “oh! And my bunny!” 13 moaned. _Hello my sexy Sir._ She called. “where were you two?” he asked.

“I wasn’t feeling well so sherry took me to see Dr. Carson.” I answered. He gave me a worried look. Sherry gave me a hug, thanking me before she moved inside the parlor, she patted Negan on the shoulder.

“are you okay?” he asked softly. I studied his face.

“of course.” he looked up as a few saviors passed. He grabbed my hand pulling me aside, away from prying eyes and ears.

“no, bunny. Are you okay with what happened with Kirstin?” I looked at my shoes, my purple converse that had unicorns, negan had gifted them to me they were dirty now.

“not really.” I answered softly. “I threw up.”

“I know, baby.” he whispered. "Simon told me.”  he reached out taking my chin in his hand making me look up at him. “I had to show them that they can’t get away with that shit.” I nodded. He leaned down kissing me gently on the mouth. When we pulled away, I couldn’t help but smile up at him.

A savior came up next to Negan whispering in his ear. Negan looked at the savior and nodded. The savior left us.

“is something wrong?” I asked softly. Negan shook his head.

“no, in fact a plan of mine just set in motion.” he grinned down at me. He kissed me again. “okay, now you run along.” I nodded.

 

After lunch I hummed as I moved through the back where the motorcycles were. It was easier to get the room this way. I rubbed the back of my neck. Gina was avoiding me. I had tried to chat with her about Kirstin, but she was “too busy” to chat. _don’t worry! It's just her hormones_ 13 informed me. _She'll be okay, just give her time._ I agreed with 13.

I cried out as someone slammed into me. We both stumbled to the ground. I looked over to see Daryl.

“oh! my goodness are you okay?” I asked rolling to my feet helping him. He didn’t say anything as he climbed to his feet. “did I hurt you?” I asked. He looked around, snapped his arm from my grip, running to the motorcycles. “wait! You're bleeding!” I shouted following him.

I jumped as the door closet to us burst open, saviors begun to pour out, the door Daryl had exited and I was about to enter opened more savior rushed out. I looked at them with confusion. We were surrounded. Fat joey pointed a gun at Daryl.

“Joey what are you doing?” I asked panicked.

“fuck, Steph what are you doing here?” Simon snapped. I jumped as he stalked toward me.

“I was going to my room when I crashed in to him.” I pointed to Daryl. I heard whistling, and turned in time to see Negan approaching us.

“Bunny, what the fuck are you doing here?” he asked as he entered the circle. I gave a squeak as Simon grabbed my arm.

“wrong place, wrong time.” he told Negan who nodded. Simon dragged me toward the entrance.

“what about Daryl?” I asked softly. Simon didn’t answer. Once we were inside the building Simon turned to me.

“how do you know his name?” he asked.

“I heard Sherry call him that.” I answered. Simon stared down at me. “am I in trouble?” I asked softly. He shook his head.

“no, honey.” he pulled me in a hug. “I saw him near you and I got worried.” I hugged him back.

“is he dangerous?” I asked. Simon nodded.

“he hit Negan.” I gave a gasp.

“I know.” he gave me a kiss. “okay, you go and rest, and I'll catch up with you later?” I nodded. he smiled down at me kissing me again. He pulled away from me, he cupped my face in his hands. “fuck you are too cute!” he kissed me again. I gave a laugh. We looked up as Fat Joey poked his head in.

“Negan's looking for you.” Simon nodded. He gave me a quick peck again before leaving. I moved toward my room, fatigue moving through my body.

 

A knock at my bedroom door woke me up. I gave a groan as I rolled off my bed. I pulled on my robe as I sluggishly moved to the door. I gave a yawn as I opened the door. Dwight stared down at me.

“oh! Hi.” he looked around before shoving in to my room, closing the door behind him. “hey!”

“what do you know about Sherry’s pregnancy test?” he asked. _quick play dumb!_ 13 shouted.

“what’s a pregnancy test?” _too dumb girl!_  13 face palmed shaking her head. Dwight shook his head, laughter threatening to spill. “okay, but you can’t tell Sherry I told you.” Dwight nodded. “she told me that if she was pregnant that it would have been your baby.” Dwight's eyes widen.

“really?” I nodded.

“she’s still in love with you.” I told him. A genuine smile bloomed on his face. “maybe you can talk to her, she was really hurt when you yelled at her.” Dwight nodded. Without a word he hugged me. I tensed up; Dwight never seemed like the hugg-y type. I awkwardly patted his back.

“thank you, Steph. I thought she didn’t love me, but this is the best news I heard all week.”  my door burst open.

“Bunny! I need some loving...” Negan trailed off as me and Dwight pulled away. he narrowed his eyes at us. “what the fuck is going on here?”

“she said she’ll bake me a cake for my birthday.” Dwight smiled at Negan. I nodded smiling at Negan.

“get the fuck out.” he snapped. Dwight nodded; he gave me a small wave as he closed the door behind him. Negan locked the door, as he stared at me. I suddenly felt guilt rip through me I hated lying to him and Simon. He placed Lucille against the wall, moving up to me. “so, what were you two talking about?” he asked.

“birthday cake.” I whispered.

“in your room?” I nodded.

“I was taking a nap.” he slowly reached up cupping my face. He studied my face. 

“why was he touching you?”

“it was a hug; he was super happy.”

“about a damn cake?” I bit my lip in thought. “you’re being really suspicious bunny.” he growled. _just tell him the truth girl!_ 13 shouted. _but I promised sherry!_  I argued. _fine just think quick!_

“I love you Negan.” I told him. Thinking of  when my heroines in my fanfic submit to their love interest. “I belong to you and Simon. Nobody else.” a grin slowly formed on his mouth.

“now, that’s what I fucking want to hear.” he kissed me hard on the mouth. I reached up grabbing his hips pulling him closer, his hardness already poking my stomach. “fuck...” he moaned pulling away. _I love how he moans!_   13 fell over hearts dancing around her. “we’re not done talking-” I pushed him against my bed, he cried out as he bounced on my mattress. I had to make sure to keep him busy. I fell to my knees between his legs.

“no more talking.” I told him as I undid his belt and unzipped his pants.

“shit, bunny--”

“no talking!” I told him pulling his hard cock from his pants. Without a word I took him in my mouth. He hissed in pleasure arching up. His hands buried in my hair. I worked him with my mouth praying that he would forget his questions about Dwight. Negan growled pulled my head up. I pulled from him breathing hard. He grabbed my arm pulling me on top of him kissing hard, he rolled over so I was underneath him.

“on your stomach.” he demanded. I gave a nod rolling over my stomach his hand slid over my hips pushing my sleeping shirt over my ass. I cried out as he entered me fast and hard. “who do you belong to?” he asked in my ear, as he begun to thrust. His pants in my ear. “who?”

“you, Negan!” I moaned pushing against his hips. I grabbed at my sheets arching.

“Fuck, Steph.” he whispered. “Steph...” he pounded against me. He was hitting my g spot, making me see stars. I could hear 13 squealing somewhere about Negan's hard cock inside me. Negan interlaced his fingers with mine. His forehead pressing in to the back of my head.

It didn’t take too long for me to come. I cried out his name as I saw stars. He grunted against me.

“fuck!” came with a growl arching against. “fuck...” he whispered. The only thing heard in the room was out labored breathing. I basked in the feeling of him on top of me, the feeling of him inside me. I wiggled my hips against him. He groaned. “let me take a breath Bunny.” he laughed pulling out of me, I gave a soft moan. He rolled off me landing next to me. I turned to look at him. “I'm heading to a new community today.” he told me.

“new?” he nodded.

“Alexandria. I have to teach some prick a lesson.” I thought for a second.

“are they the people that killed our friends?” I asked softly. He nodded he leaned forward kissing me.

“don’t think about that Steph.” he whispered once he pulled away. “just think about how good I'm going to make you fucking feel.” he moved down the ground moving between my legs. _oh fuck..._ 13 squealed.  _he’s so talented with his tongue._ I moaned in agreement as Negan worked me with his mouth. Taking Negan's advice to heart, I drifted along the pleasure he was giving.

 


	14. She Tried She Really Did

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nami tried to paint Negan as a bad guy, Steph is whisked away to Simon's surprise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> now that i have a plot line and everything... this story just feels different.

“now, Simon has some duties to finish,” Negan told me as we both exited my bedroom. “but he’s gonna give you that fucking surprise you missed the other day, tonight okay?” I nodded excitement running through me again. “so be good.” I gave a laugh.

“you know I'm a good girl!” he grinned down at me.

“oh, I fucking know.” he kissed me on the mouth pulling me close. Negan gave a sigh as he pulled from me. “be safe bunny.” I smiled up at him. With a squeeze to my hip, he moved down the hall whistling.

The silence of the library made it easy for me to write my journal entry. As  I poured my feelings on to the paper before me, it made me realized how quiet my life was before I took Negan's deal. It made me wonder, would Simon and I have the relationship we had now? Would Negan even know who I was? Would Kirstin and I still be at each other throats? I sighed closing my eyes. Sure, I been through a lot, but I wouldn’t change anything. 

“Steph?” I looked up at Gina as she sat down next to me. I turned to her.

“Are you mad at me?” I asked. She gave me a tired smile.

“no, never.” she sighed rubbing her belly. “I'm sorry.” her eyes glossed over. 

“Gina, I’m  sorr —” I started but she raised her hand cutting me off.

“no,” she shook her head. “I was so mad at Kirstin, I wanted Negan to kill her, I wanted her to pay for what she almost did. Then you wanted to save her, and I got mad at you . I was so mad at you, I just wanted you to shrug and say oh well, but that’s not you baby. You...believe in people. And I can’t change that, and I don’t want you to change.” she wiped her eyes. She reached out hugging me.  “you’re my family,  you know that?  I thought I had lost what was left of my family.  You were my rock in this harsh and destroyed world.  You were there for me When  Siomara  died. If you hadn’t saved me, I wouldn’t be here, with a husband and a baby.” Gina hugged me. “I’m so sorry.” I hugged her back.

“it’s okay Gee!” I told her rubbing her back. “besides, I saved Kirstin because, she was being manipulated!” Gina pulled away to look at me.

“what?” I told Gina about the third figure. “that’s insane!” Gina tilted her head in thought. “who do you think it is?” she asked. “Nami?” I shook my head.

“Nami can’t leave the sanctuary remember?” Gina nodded.

“you need to be careful.” Gina whispered taking my hands in hers. I nodded. “have Simon teach you to fight, okay.” I smiled at her nodding.

“I’m gonna see him tonight!”

“good.” she kissed me on the forehead. “okay, I'm going to take a nap.” I nodded. I moved to my feet helping her.

“do you want me to walk you to your room?”

“no, you finish writing. I love you.”

“I love you too.” I watched her leave the library.  _  she’s still our best friend!  _  13 shouted jumping around. As I sat back at the table, I flinched to see Nami sitting across from me.  _ How the fuck...?   _  13 whispered.

“hi.” she smiled at me. I looked around. “I'm not here to start anything.”  _  DON’T TRUST THIS BITCH!  _  13 screamed. 

“you hurt me.” I stated. She sighed.

“I know I'm sorry.” I was surprised to hear her apologize. She reached out taking my hands in hers. A part of me wanted to rip my hands from her grip, but I knew she would hurt me if I tried.

“what do you want Nami?” I asked. Her lips twitched. She didn’t like my tone.

“how much do you know about Negan?” she asked. I tilted my head at her. “ you  don’t know him like we, the  _ wives, _  know him.”  _  kick her in the head and run!  _  13 told me swinging her  verion  of Lucille. Curiosity peaked in me.

“what do you mean?” she smiled.

“come on baby, I'll show you.” 

We moved through prison. I could hear sobbing coming  from  one of the  cells. _  Kirstin.  _ I looked around anxiety pulsing through me. I knew I was not supposed to be here. The saviors had made it clear. One time a year back, I  accidentally  made way here and was yelled at.

 “Here.” Nami stopped at a cell. Regina was leaning against the wall. “Hi Ginny.” she batted her eyelashes at the taller woman.

“five minutes.” Regina stated as she opened the cell. Nami tilted her head in the doorway. I peeked in to see Daryl leaning against the wall.

“Daryl?” I asked. His head snapped up to look at me. Nami came up beside me.

“this is Daryl, Negan bashed his friends head in.” I looked at Nami with my mouth open. She nodded. “he killed two innocent people Steph.” I looked back at Daryl. “tell her Daryl.”

“He came out of nowhere. He played a game to choose who would die.” Daryl spoke his voice deep and growly. I pulled my backpack to my front grabbing my water bottle. I held it out to him. He stared at it with confusion.

“you might be thirsty.” I whispered. He didn’t say anything but took it from my hand opening it to down the water. Once it was empty, he handed it back to me. I put it away.

“he killed Maggie’s husband, Glenn, he was going to be a father.” I looked down at my feet. Mind reeling, Negan didn’t know right?

“see, baby.” Nami said. “Negan's not a hero.” I looked at her. “Simon stood by and watched. They killed innocent people.” I thought about Negan and Simon, they didn’t just kill people. If that was true, they would have killed me and the other if we first met. Simon had saved us from bad men, we had lived here in the sanctuary peacefully. Negan believed people were resources. 

“Negan and Simon would do that in retaliation.” I spoke softly. I looked at Daryl. “your people killed my friends at the outpost!” Daryl looked at me eyes   wide. “you killed Kenny!” Nami grabbed my hand giving it a painful warning squeeze.

“no! Negan is a bad guy!” she snapped. I looked at Regina, the taller woman looked away as if she was ashamed. I snapped my hand from Nami’s iron grip.

“at least he killed two! You and your people killed forty, men and women in their sleep! You guys are cowards! They had kids, families! And you’re pissed because Negan killed two of your people?” I shouted. I looked at Nami. “how dare you? We lost friends, family. And you’re saying the  _ negan _  is a bad guy?” I looked down at Daryl. “I’m sorry your friends were killed, but you brought this upon yourselves.” I gave Nami a glare before moving away from the cell, down the hall.

“Steph!” she shouted chasing after me. I ignored her. I cried out as she shoved me, I slammed in to the wall. I  spun  around in time as she pressed her body against mine. “Negan is a monster!”

“you’re the fucking monster!” I shouted shoving at her, I was surprised how strong she was. she hit me hard across the face. I saw stars as pain exploded through my cheek.

“shut up! He forced you to have sex him! He's a rapist!” she screamed her hands wrapping around my neck.

“No! You forced me to have sex with you! I always wanted Negan! Not you!" I shouted back kicking at her, scratching her face. Her hands getting tighter.  _  we can’t breathe!  _  13 screamed clutching at her throat. 

She screamed as she was thrown away from me. I leaned against the wall fear enveloping me. Breathing hard, throat hurting. Hands grabbed at my throat I whimpered looking up.

“are you okay Steph?” Simon asked looking over my neck, his hand gently rubbing at my skin. “Fucking bitch.” Simon snarled pulling his gun from the holster pointing it to Nami, she was against the wall sobbing, her hands on her head.

“Simon don’t!” I reached out grabbing his arm. He looked down at me. “she’s a wife.” he took an angry breath. Regina was at Nami’s side comforting her. He was shaking as he returned his gun to his holster. “take her back to the pussy parlor.” Simon snapped at Regina. The taller woman nodded scooping Nami up bridal style. Once Regina was out of sight, Simon turned to me.

“what the hell are you doing down here?” he asked. I looked up at him, grabbing at his shirt. I pressed my forehead in to his chest. Realizing how close I had been to death. Simon wrapped his arms around my body. “Steph,” he whispered rubbing my back comfortingly as I cried. “Oh, my poor baby. I'm here.”

“Nami,” I stammered. “she wanted me to meet Daryl.” Simon growled. 

“Fucking Nmai.” he muttered. He pulled away from me taking my hand. “tell me everything.” I did, I told him as we left the Cell area.

“she said Negan’s a monster.” I finished as we came up to Simon’s Jeep. He gave a frustrated sound as he leaned against the door of his truck. He pulled me against him holding me close. He kissed me on the head.

“do you think he’s a monster?” Simon asked. I shook my head. I looked up at him. 

“No, he just has to do what he has to.” I bit my lip thinking of Daryl. “Daryl's people killed our people in their sleep. They were lucky Negan only killed two.” Simon raised an eyebrow; he rubbed my back in small circles. I buried my face in his chest, taking in his scent. “she said Negan was a rapist!” my voice was muffled. Simon’s hands paused, then he continued.

“Nami is a fucking idiot.” he whispered. I nodded. I looked up at him, he kissed me gently on the mouth. “promise me that you’ll stay away from that psycho.” I gave him a nod. “and that you’ll tell Negan what happened between you and Nami.” I nodded again. He kissed me one more time. 

“I promise Simon.” He hugged me tightly. I hugged him back smiling into his chest. We stayed holding each other for a few minutes. I pulled away from him. “what were you doing in the cells?” Simon looked down at me.

“I had to check on Daryl before I took you to your surprise.” he answered. I smiled up at him.

“Negan told me!” he smiled down at me. 

“ okay,  honey let’s go!” I nodded ecstatically.  “maybe this will cheer you up.”

“oh please!” he kissed me on the head pulling us from the truck.

“keep your eyes closed honey.” Simon's voice was nearby. I nodded keeping my hands over my eyes. “I would ask you to take a step, but I know how clumsy you can be.” I pouted.

“hey, I'm not that clumsy!” I told him. I heard him give a laugh.

“okay, take two steps forward.” I nodded. I stumbled as I stepped on my shoelace. I felt an arm wrap around my waist holding me steady.

“See,” Simon teased his mouth near my ear. “I told you.” my face burned red. 13 facepalmed. “go ahead Honey open your eyes.” I pulled my hands from my face, gasping at the view before me.

We stood in a garden, fairy lights hung from strings around us, lighting the area in a soft glow. a fort sheet was pulled up not far, dozens of blankets and pillows underneath the fort. I saw a large picnic basket was near the pillows. I turned to Simon a big smile on my face.

“do you like it?” he asked. Instead of answering I threw myself at him hugging him tightly. 

“I love it!” I squealed. He laughed.

“Good, now come on.” he pulled me toward the fort. “Okay, so I found a movie projector, and some reels from an abandoned movie theater.” Simon told me his voce laced with excitement. “but we have to keep the volume low because of the walkers okay?” I nodded. I pulled off my shoes climbing on to the blankets and snuggling against the pillows.

“this is so cool!” I told him as he fiddled with the projector. As the movie popped on the sheet in front of us, I gave a squeal. “I love this movie!” I told Simon as he sat down next to me. He kissed me on the head.

“I know, I remember you telling me about it.” Simon reached for the picnic basket. “I also got us snacks!” He pulled Tupperware of food from the basket placing it next to him. I found myself hugging Simon again, grateful that he was doing this. He turned to me smiling.

“thank you, Simon.” I whispered. “I really need this after …" he nodded kissing me on the head.

“I know Honey, now relax and watch the movie.” I nodded, we cuddle up against each other, eyes on the movie.

Into the second movie, Simon and I were making out. 

“fuck,” Simon whispered pulling away from me. “I can’t believe I'm making out with you right now.” he told me. I giggled.

“what?” he smiled down at me.

“is this the sweater we met in?”  he slid his hands under my sweater.  I nodded. Arousal coursing through me.

“yeah! It's my favorite!” he kissed me again.

“I really liked you, you know.” he said once he pulled away. I tilted my head up at him. 

“yeah right.”

“no, for real. the first time you jumped in my arms, I saw hearts.” I laughed. He smiled down at me. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you. Then I kissed Kirstin and you hated me.” I toyed with the button on his shirt.

“I didn’t hate you. I was hurt.” Simon nodded.

“but then I saw you had a massive crush on Negan, and I knew I lost.” Simon sighed. “all the girls like Negan, he’s hot.” 

“I actually liked him because he was kind to me.” Simon raised an eyebrow. “he complimented my sweater, after he saved me.”

“saved you?” Simon asked. I nodded.

“yeah! Remember Devon?” Simon nodded. “he was making fun of me, and told me that I would be good as a practice girl, then he tried to force me to kiss him, he ripped my shirt open. Negan came out of nowhere throwing Devon aside, he apologized for Devon’s behavior, told me that what Devon tried to do was unacceptable. Then Devon was taken away.” I nuzzled Simon’s chest. “i saw Devon on the fence as a walker.” I whispered. “I knew what Negan did and how serious he was.” memories of how I embarrassed myself in front of Negan made way. I shook my head laughing. 

“that’s funny?” Simon asked. I shook my head.

“no .  remember when you carried me away after I  accidentally  threw Negan's birthday present in his face and I had to get stitches here?” I said pointing to my eyebrow  where the scar was at.  Simon laughed nodding.

“I was so worried when I saw your face covered in blood.” Simon kissed me on the head. “Negan loved the gift; he was heartbroken that you were avoiding him that day. I had to remind him that you did embarrass yourself.”

“does he still have the scarf I made?” I asked softly. Simon smiled at me.

“It’s the one he wears honey.” I smiled at him. 

“really?” Simon nodded.

“Steph, I never apologized for that day.” Simon said softly.

“what day?” 

“when you kicked Kirstin in the face? When she stole your book and humiliated you.”

“oh! When you knocked me down and held the knife to my neck?” Simon nodded a grim look on his face. I patted his arm.

“it’s okay, I hit a wife you had to do that. It's your job!” Simon shook his head.

“fuck, why are you so sweet?” he pulled me close kissing me hard on the mouth. “I love you; you know that?” he asked. I nodded.

“I love you too.” I pulled him down kissing him on the mouth, my hands exploring his hard chest and shoulders, his hands roaming over my stomach and hips. He pulled away hurrying to undo his shirt. I helped him pull the fabric from his body. He helped me out of my sweater, his hands grabbing at my breast.

“fuck I love you.” he whispered his mouth on my neck and shoulders in sloppy kisses.

“Simon,” I whispered as I reached down to undo his pants. Slipping my hand inside the to grab his  cock.  he moaned in my neck, working himself in my hand. He kissed me hard against the mouth, pushing my maxi skirt over my hips. His hand fin d ing my pussy. I gasped arching against him as his thumb rubbed my clit in small circles.

Without another word he pulled his hand from me. I pulled my hand from his pants, as he pushed the fabric down past his hips. He kissed me hard on the mouth, entering me in the same motion. 

I cried out as he worked his hips against mine, kissing me, gently working me in a slow manner. His whisper of encouragements in my ear, his hand groping and squeezing. 

This was different from how we normally had sex, it was slow, and sensual. 13 danced around screaming about Simon’s scent, his kisses...  _  we’re making love bitch!  _  13 shouted. Simon kissed me gently on the mouth. I clutched at him, whimpering in pleasure. 

“I love you.” I whispered in his ear as he worked me. Simon gave a small grunt kissing me again.  I faded in the pleasure he was giving me, in to the emotions I felt around him. The pleasure that I finally understood carried me away.

Simon and I were facing each other, studying each other faces. He gave me a gentle smile, his hand stroking my hip. I reached out  booping  him on the nose with my finger tip.

“ boop .” he laughed, reaching up taking my hand in his kissing my palm. Simon rested my hand against his bare chest, his thumb rubbing small circles on the back of my hand.

“i got something for you.” he whispered. I studied his brown eyes I liked how they changed shape when he smiled. 

“now I feel bad because I didn’t get you anything.” he pulled my hand from his chest giving it one more kiss before he rolled over grabbing his pants. 

“don’t be. I like spoiling you.” he answered as He rolled on his back digging through his pockets. he rolled on his side to face me again. He held the item up to me. “tada.” it was a pretty silver ring with a purple stone in the shape of a heart, it was hanging off a silver necklace. I sat up looking at the ring. I didn’t say anything but stared at the ring. “it’s a promise ring.” I looked at Simon as he sat up as well, the blankets low on his hips.

“promise ring?” I asked gently taking the ring from his hand. He nodded. “why are you giving me a promise ring?

“You’re my girlfriend.” I looked up at him. 

“girlfriend?” I repeated. He nodded.

“yeah. Did you think I was just sleeping with you for the hell of it?” he teased. he leaned down kissing me on the mouth. 

“what about Negan?” I asked softly when he pulled away. Simon slid a hand through his hair.

“this ring means I'm committed to you. I know you love Negan too, so that’s fine. But that mean nobody else. Just me and Negan.” I nodded. Simon tilted his head. “well, I know that you’re not going to cheat on us, you like us too much.”

“well, yeah! I write  fanfiction  about you two!” he laughed pulling me close. He helped me put on the necklace. 

“keep it safe okay?” I nodded. Simon reached for his drink.

“I don’t have a gift for you.” I said sadly. Simon took a swig of his drink. An Idea came to mind. “I know you can put it in my butt!” Simon choked on his drink.

“what?” he coughed wiping at his mouth.

“I don’t have a gift for you, and I overhead from the other cooks that some men like anal sex and it feel s  good.” Simon stared at me with his mouth wide open. “also, I think it might be good research for my stories.” I tilted my head in thought. “I mean I am worried about poop, and I don’t know if you have lube, but--” simon pulled me in a kiss.

“why are you so cute?” he laughed kissing me again. I pushed him on his back, straddling his hips.

“so yes, on the anal?” I asked. he laughed again , reaching  up to pull me in a kiss.  _ Well, we didn’t hear a no… _  13 sang.


End file.
